Roger
Zelazny
Knight
of Shadows
I
Her name was Julia, and I'd been damn certain she was dead
back on April 30 when it all began. My finding her grisly remains and
destroying the doglike creature which I'd thought had killed her were pretty
much the way it started. And we had been lovers, which I suppose was how things
had really commenced. Long before.
Perhaps I could have trusted her more. Perhaps I should
never have taken hex on that shadow-walls which led to denials that took her
away from me, down dark ways and into the studio of Victor Melman, a nasty
occultist I later had to kill-the same Victor Melman who was himself the dupe
of Luke and Jasra. But now, perhaps-just barely-I might have been in a position
to forgive myself for what I'd thought I'd done, for it seemed that I hadn't
really done it after all. Almost.
That is to say, I learned that I hadn't been responsible for
it while I was in the act of doing it. It was when I drove my knife into the
side of the mysterious sorcerer
Mask, who had been on my case for some time, that I discovered
that Mask was really Julia. My half brother Jurt, who's been trying to kill me
longer than anyone else in the business, snatched her away, and they vanished
then, immediately following his transformation into a kind of living Trump.
As I fled the burning, crumbling Keep there at the Citadel
of the Four Worlds, a falling timber caused me to dodge to my right, trapping
me in a cul-de-sac of crashed masonry and burning beams. A dark metal ball
flashed past me then, seeming to grow as it moved. It struck the wall and
passed through it, leaving a hole one could dive through-a hint I was not slow
in taking. Outside I jumped the moat, using my Logrus extensions to knock aside
a section of fence and a score of troops, before I turned back and shouted,
Mandor!
Right here, came his soft voice from behind my left
shoulder.
I turned in time to see him catch a metal ball, which
bounced once before us and dropped into his extended hand.
He brushed ashes from his black vest and ran a hand through
his hair. Then he smiled and turned back toward the burning Keep.
You've kept your promise to the Quecn, he remarked, and I
don't believe there's anything more for you here. Shall we go now?
Jasra's still inside, I answered, having it out with
Sharu.
I thought you were done with her.
I shook my head.
She still knows a lot of things I don't. Things I'll be
needing.
A tower of flame began to rear itself above the Keep, halted
and hovered a moment, heaved itself higher.
I didn't realize, he said. She does seem to want control
of that fountain fairly badly. If we were to snatch her away now, that fellow
Sharu will claim it. Does that matter?
If we don't snatch her away, he may kill her. Mandor
shrugged.
I've a feeling she'll take him. Would you care to place a
small wager?
Could be you're right, I said, watching the fountain
continue its climb skyward, following another pause. I gestured toward it.
Thing looks like an oil gusher. I hope the winner knows how to cap it-if there
is a winner. Neither one of them may last much longer, the way the place is
coming apart.
He chuckled.
You underestimate the forces they've generated to protect
themselves, he said. And you know it isn't all that easy for one sorcerer to
do in another by sorcerous means. However, you've a point there when it comes
to the inertia of the mundane. With your permission..?
I nodded.
With a quick underhand toss he cast the metal ball across
the ditch toward the burning building. It struck the ground and with each
bounce thereafrer it seemed to increase in size. It produced a cymballike crash
each time it hit, entirely out of proportion with its apparent mass and
velocity, and this sound increased in volume on each successive bounce. It
passed then into the burning, tottering ruin that was the near end of the Keep
and for several moments was gone from sight.
I was about to ask him what was going on when I saw the
shadow of a large ball pass before the opening through which I had fled. The
flames-save for the central tower from the broken Fount-began to subside, and a
deep rumbling sound came from within. Moments later an even larger circular
shadow passed, and I began to feel the rumbling through the soles of my boots.
A wall tumbled. Shortly thereafter part of another wall
fell. I could see inside fairly clearly Through the dust and smoke the image of
the giant ball passed again. The flames were snuffed. My Logrus vision still
granted me glimpses of the shifting lines of power which flowed between Jasra
and Sharu.
Mandor extended a hand. A minute or so later a small metal
ball came bouncing our way, and he caught it. Let's head back, he said. It
would be a shame to miss the end.
We passed through one of the many gaps in the fence, and
sufficient rubble filled the ditch at one point for us to walk across on it. I
spent a barrier spell then, to keep the re-forming troops of the prenuses and
out of our way for a time.
Entering through the broken wall, I saw that Jasra stood
with her back to the tower of fire, her arms upraised. Streaks of sweat lined
her face zebra through a mask of soot, and I could feel the pulsing of the
forces which passed through her body. About ten feet above her, face purple and
head twisted to one side as if his neck were broken, Sharu hung in the middle
of the air. To the untutored he might have seemed magically levitated. My
Logrus sight gave me view of the line of force from which he hung suspended,
however, victim of what might, I suppose, be termed a magical lynching.
Bravo, Mandor stated, clapping his hands slowly and softly
together. You see, Merlin? I'd have won that bet.
You always were a better judge of talent than I was, I
acknowledged.
...and swear to serve me, I overheard Jasra saying. Sharu's
lips moved.
And swear to serve you, he gasped.
She lowered her arms slowly, and the line of force which
held him began to lengthen. As he descended toward the Keep's cracked floor;
her left hand executed a gesture similar to one I had once seen an orchestra
conductor employ in encouraging the woodwinds, and a great gout of fire came
loose from the Fountain, fell upon him, washed over him, and passed on down
into the ground. Flashy, though I didn't quite see the point...
His slow descent continued, as if someone in the sky were
trolling for crocodiles. I discovered myself holding my breath as his feet
neared the ground, in sympathetic anticipation of the eased pressure on his
neck. This, however, did not come to pass. When his feet reached the ground,
they passed on into it, and his descent continued, as if he were an occulted
hologram. He sank past his ankles and up to his knees and kept going. I could
no longer tell whether he was breathing. A soft litany of commands rolled from
Jasra's lips, and sheets of flame periodically separated themselves from the
Fountain and splashed over him. He sank past his waist and up to his shoulders
and slightly beyond. When only his head remained visible, eyes open but unfocused,
she executed another hand move. went, and his journey into the earth was
halted.
You are now the guardian of the Fount, she stated,
answerable only to me. Do you acknowledge this?
The darkened lips writhed.
Yes, came a whispered reply.
Go now and bank the fires, she ordered. Commence your
tenure.
The head seemed to nod at the same time it began sinking
again. After a moment only a cottony tuft of hair remained, and an instant
later the ground swallowed this, too. The line of force vanished.
I cleared my throat. At the sound Jasra let her arms fall
and turned toward me. She was smiling faintly.
Is he alive or dead? I asked, and then added, Academic
curiosity.
I'm not really certain, she responded. But a little of
both, I think. Like the rest of us.
Guardian of the Fount, I reflected. Interesting
existence.
Beats being a coatrack, she observed. I daresay.
I suppose you feel I owe you some gratitude now, for my
restoratin, she stated.
I shrugged.
To tell you the truth, I've other things to think about, I
said.
You wanted an end to the feud, she said, and I wanted
this place back. I still have no kind thoughts toward Amber, but I am willing
to say we're even.
I'll settle for that, I told her. And there is a small
loyalty I may share with you.
She studied me through narrowed eyes for a moment, then
smiled.
Don't worry about Luke, she said.
But I must. That son of a bitch Daft-
She continued to smile.
Do you know something I don't? I asked.
Many things, she replied.
Anything you'd care to share?
Knowledge is a marketable commodity, she observed, as the
ground shook slightly and the fiery tower swayed. I'm offering to help your
son and you're offering to sell me the information on how to go about it? I
inquired.
She laughed.
If I thought Rinaldo needed help, she said, I'd be at his
side this moment. I suppose it makes it easier to hate me if you feel I lack
even maternal virtues.
Hey, I thought we were calling things even, I said.
That doesn't preclude hating each other, she replied.
Come on, lady! Outside of the fact that you tried to kill
me year after year, I've got nothing against you. You happen to be the mother
of someone I like and respect. If he's in trouble, I want to help him, and I'd
as soon be on good terms with you.
Mandor cleared his throat as the flames dropped ten feet,
shuddered, dropped again.
I've some fine culinary spells, he remarked, should
recent exertions have roused some appetites.
Jasra smiled almost coquettishly, and I'd swear she batted
her eyelashes at him. While he makes a striking appearance with that shock of
white hair, I don't know that you'd exactly call Mandor handsome. I've never
understood why women are as attracted to him as they usually seem to be. I've
even checked him out for spells on that particular count, but he doesn't wear
one. It must be some different order of magic entirely.
A fine idea, she responded. I'll provide the setting if
you'll take care of the rest.
Mandor bowed; the flames collapsed the rest of the way to
the ground and were damped therein. Jasra shouted an order to Sharu, the
Invisible Guardian, telling him to keep them that way Then she turned and led
us toward the downward stair.
Underground passage, she explained, to more civilized
shores.
It occurs to me, I remarked, that anyone we encounter
will probably be loyal to Julia.
Jasra laughed.
As they were to me before her and to Sharu before me, she
replied. They are professionals. They come with the place. They are paid to
defend the winners, not to avenge the losers. I will put in as appearannce and
make a proclamation after dinner, and I will enjoy their unanimous and
heartfelt loyalty until the next usurpation. Mind that third step. There's a
loose flagstone.
So she led us on, through a section of fake wall and into a
dark tunnel, heading in what I believed to be a northwesterly direction toward
the area of the Citadel which I had investigated somewhat on my previous
journey this way. That was the day I had rescued her from Mask/Julia and taken
her back to Amber to be a coatrack in our citadel for a while. The tunnel we
entered was totally dark, but she conjured a darting dot, bright in its
will-o'-the-wispiness, which preceded us through the gloom and the damp. The
air was stale and the walls were cobwebby. The floor was of bare earth, save
for an irregular patch of flagstones down its middle; there were occasional
fetid puddles at either hand; and small dark creatures flashed past us-both on
the ground and in the air-every now and then.
Actually, I did not need the light. Probably none of us did.
I held to the Sign of the Logrus, which provided a magical way of seeing,
granting a silvery, directionless illumination. I maintained it because it
would also give me a warning against magical effects-which might include booby
trap spells about the premises or, for that matter, a bit of treachery on
Jasra's part. One effect of this seeing was to note that the Sign also hovered
before Mandor, who, to my knowledge, has never been much into trust either. Something
cloudy and vaguely Pattern-like also occupied a similar position vis-b-vis
Jasra, completing the circle of wariness. And the light danced on before us.
We emerged from behind a stack of barrels into what appeared
to be a very well-stocked wine cellar. Mandor paused after six paces and
carefully removed a dusty bottle from the rack to our left. He drew a corner of
his cloak across its label.
Oh, my! he observed.
What is it? Jasra inquired.
If this is still good, I can build an unforgettable meal
around it.
Really? Better bring several to be sure then, she said. These
go back before my time-perhaps before Sharu's time even.
Merlin, you bring these two, he said, passing me a pair. Carefully,now.
He studied the rest of the rack before selecting two more,
which he carried himself.
I can see why this place is often under siege, he remarked
to Jasra. I'd have been inclined to have a go at it myself had I known about
this part.
She reached out and squeezed his shoulder.
There are easier ways to get what you want, she said,
smiling.
I'll remember that, he replied. I hope you'll hold me to
it.
I cleared my throat.
She gave me a small frown, then turned away. We followed her
out a low doorway and up a creaking flight of wooden stairs. We emerged in a
large pantry and passed through it into an immense, deserted kitchen.
Never a servant around when you need one, she remarked,
casting her gaze about the room.
We won't be needing one, Mandor said. Find me a congenial
dining area and I'll manage.
Very well, she replied. This way then.
She led us through the kitchen; then we passed through a
series of rooms till we came to a stairway, which we mounted.
Ice fields? she asked. Lava fields? Mountains? Or a
storm-tossed sea?
If you are referring to a choice of views, Mandor
responded, give me the mountains.
He glanced at me, and I nodded.
She conducted us to a long, narrow room, where we unfastened
a series of shutters to behold a dappled range of round-topped peaks, The room
was cool and a bit dusty with shelves running the length of the near wall. These
held books, writing implements, crystals, magnifying glasses, small pots of
paint, a few simple magical instruments, a microscope, and a telescope. There
was a trestle table at the room's middle, a bench on either side of it.
How long will it take to prepare this? Jasra asked.
A minute or two, Mandor said.
In that case, she said, I would like to repair myself
somewhat first. Perhaps you would also.
Good idea, I said.
Indeed, Mandor acknowledged.
She led us to what must have been guest quarters, not too
far away, and left us with soap, towels, and water. We agreed to meet back in
the narrow room in half as hour.
Think she's planning something nasty? I asked as I drew
off my shirt.
No, Mandor replied. I like to flatter myself in thinking
that she would not want to miss this meal. Nor, do I feel, would she want us to
miss seeing her at her best, having so far seen her at something less than
that. And a possibility of gossip, confidences... He shook his head. You may
never have been able to trust her before and may never again. But this meal
will be a Time-out if I'm any judge.
I'lI hold you to that, I said as I splashed and lathered.
Mandor gave me a crooked smile, then conjured a corkscrew
and opened the bottles-to let them breathe a littlebefore he tended to
himself. I trusted his judgment, but I hung on to the Sign of the Logrus in
case I had to duel with a demon or avoid a falling wall.
No demons sprang; no masonry toppled. I entered the dining
room behind Mandor and watched him transform it with a few words and gestures. The
trestle table and the benches were replaced by a round table and
comfortable-looking chairs-the chairs so situated as to provide a good view of
the mountains from each. Jasra had not yet arrived, and I was carrying the two
wine bottles whose respiration Mandor found most appealing. Before I could even
set them down, Mandor conjured an embroidered tablecloth and napkins; delicate
china, which looked as if it had been hand decorated by Miru; finely wrought
silverware. He studied the tableau a moment, banished the silverware, summoned
a set with a different pattern. He hummed as he paced and regarded the layout
from various angles. Just as I moved forward to place the bottles on the table,
he summoned a crystal bowl filled with floating flowers as a centerpiece. I
took a step backward then as crystal goblets appeared.
I made a small growling noise, and he seemed to notice me
for the first time in a while.
Oh, set them there. Set them there, Merlin, he said, and
an ebony tray appeared on the table to my left. We'd better check to see how
the wine is holding up, before the lady arrives, he said then, pouring some of
the ruby fluid into two of the goblets.
We sampled these, and he nodded. It was better than Bayle's.
By far.
Nothing wrong there, I said.
He rounded the table, went to the window, and looked out. I
followed. Somewhere up in those mountains, I supposed, was Dave in his cave.
I feel almost guilty, I said, taking a break like this. There
are so many things I should be tending to
Possibly even more than you suspect, he said. Look upon
this less as a break than a retrenchment. And you may learn something from the
lady.
True, I replied. I wonder what, though.
He swirled his wine in his glass, took another small sip,
and shrugged.
She knows a lot. She may let something slip, or she may
feel expansive at the attention and grow generous. Take things as they're
dealt.
I took a drink, and I could be nasty and say my thumbs began
to prickle. But it was actually the Logrus field that warned me of Jasra's
approach along the hall outside. I did not remark upon it to Mandor, since I
was certain he felt it, too. I simply turned toward the door, and he matched my
movement.
She had on a low over-one-shoulder (the left) white dress,
fastened at the shoulder with a diamond pin, and she wore a tiara, also of
diamonds, which seemed almost to be radiating in the infrared range amidst her
bright hair. She was smiling, and she smelled good, too. Involuntarily I felt
myself standing straighter, and I glanced at my fingernails to be certain they
were clean.
Mandor's bow was more courtly than mine, as usual. And I
felt obliged to say something pleasant. So, You're looking quite... elegant,
I observed, letting my eyes wander to emphasize the point.
It is seldom that I dine with two princes, she remarked.
I'm Duke of the Western Marches, I said, not a prince.
I was referring to the House of Sawall, she replied.
You've been doing homework, Mandor noted, recently
I'd hate to commit a breach of protocol, she said.
I seldom use my Chaos title at this end of things, I
explained.
A pity, she told me. I find it more than a little...
elegant. Aren't you about thirtieth in the line of succession?
I laughed.
Even that great a distance is an exaggeration, I said.
No, Merle, she's about right, Mandor told me. Give or
take the usual few.
How can that be? I asked. The last time I looked-
He poured a goblet of wine and offered it to Jasra. She
accepted it with a smile.
You haven't looked recently, Mandor said. There have been
more deaths.
Really? So many?
To Chaos, Jasra said, raising her goblet. Long. may she
wave.
To Chaos, Mandor replied, raising his.
Chaos, I echoed, and we touched the goblets together and
drank.
A number of delightful aromas came to me suddenly. Turning,
I saw that the table now bore serving dishes. Jasra had turned at the same
moment, and Mandor stepped forward and gestured, causing the chairs to slide
back to accommodate us.
Be seated, please, and let me serve you, he said.
We did, and it was more than good. Several minutes passed,
and apart from compliments on the soup nothing was said. I did not want to be
the first with a conversational gambit, though it had occurred to me that the
others might feel the same way.
Finally, Jasra cleared her throat, and we both looked at
her. I was surprised that she suddenly seemed slightly nervous.
So, how are things in Chaos? she asked.
At the moment, chaotic, Mandor replied, not to be
facetious. He thought a moment, then sighed and added, Politics.
She nodded slowly, as if considering asking him for the
details he did not seem to care to divulge, then deciding against it. She
turned toward me.
Unfortunately, I'd no opportunity to sight-see while I was
in Amber, she said. From what you told me, though, life seems a bit chaotic
there also.
I nodded.
It's good that Dalt's gone, I said, if that's what you
mean. But he was never a real threat, just a nuisance. Speaking of whom-
Let's not, she interrupted, smiling sweetly. What I
really had in mind was anything else.
I smiled back.
I forgot. You're not a fan of his, I said.
It's not that, she responded. The man has his uses. It's
just"-she sighed-'politics, she finished.
Mandor laughed, and we joined him. Too bad I hadn't thought
to use that line about Amber. Too late now.
I bought a painting awhile back, I said, by a lady named
Polly Jackson. It's of a red '57 Chevy I like it a lot. It's in storage in San
Francisco right now. Rinaldo liked it, too.
She nodded, stared out the window.
You two were always stopping in some gallery of other, she
said. Yes, he dragged me to a lot of them, too. I always thought he had good
taste. No talent, but good taste.
What do you mean, 'no talent'?
He's a very good draftsman, but his own paintings were
never that interesting.
I had raised the subject for a very special reason, and this
wasn't it. But I was fascinated by a side of Luke I'd never known, and I
decided to pursue the matter.
Paintings? I never knew he painted.
He's tried any number of times, but he never shows them to
anyone because they're not good enough.
Then how do you know about them?
I'd check out his apartment periodicaliy
When he wasn't around?
Of course. A mother's privilege.
I shuddered. I thought again of the burning woman down the
Rabbit Hole. But I didn't want to say what I felt and spoil the flow now that I
had her talking. I decided to return to my original trail.
Was it in connection with any of this that he met Victor
Melman? I asked.
She studied me for a moment through narrowed eyes, then
nodded and finished her soup.
Yes, she said then, laying her spoon aside. He took a few
lessons from the man. He'd liked some of his paintings and looked him up. Perhaps
he bought something of his, too. I don't know. But at some point he mentioned
his own work and Victor asked to see it. He told Rinaldo he liked it and said
he thought he could teach him a few things that might be of help.
She raised her goblet and sniffed it, sipped her wine, and
stared at the mountains.
I was about to prompt her, hoping she'd go on, when she
began to laugh. I waited it out.
A real asshole, she said then. But talented. Give him that.
Uh, what do you mean? I asked.
After a time he began speaking of the development of
personal power, using all those circumlocutions the halfenlightened love to
play with. He wanted Rinaldo to know he was an occultist with something pretty
strong going for him. Then he began to hint that he might be willing to pass it
along to the right person.
She began laughing again. I chuckled myself, at the thought
of that trained seal addressing the genuine article in such a fashion.
It was because he realized Rinaldo was rich, of course,
she continued. Victor was, as usual, broke himself at the time. Rinaldo showed
no interest, though, and simply stopped taking painting lessons from him
shortly after that-as he felt he'd learned all he could from him. When he told
me about it later, however, I realized that the man could be made into a
perfect cat's-paw. I was certain such a person would do anything for a taste of
real power.
I nodded.
Then you and Rinaldo began the visitation business? You
took turns clouding his mind and teaching him a few real things?
Real enough, she said, though I handled most of his
training. Rinaldo was usually too busy studying for exams. His point average
was generally a little higher than yours, wasn't it?
He usually had pretty good grades; I conceded. When you
talk of empowering Melman and turning him into a tool, I can't help thinking
about the reason; You were priming him to kill me, in a particularly colorful
fashion.
She smiled.
Yes, she said, though probably not as you think. He knew
of you, and he had been trained to play a part in your sacrifice. But he acted
on his own the day he tried it, the day you killed him. He had been warned
against such a solo action, and he paid the price. He was anxious to possess
all of the powers he thought would come of it, rather than share them with
another. As I said-an asshole.
I wanted to appear nonchalant, to keep her going. Continuing
my meal seemed the best measure to indicate such poise. Then I glanced down,
however, I discovered that my soup bowl had vanished. I picked up a roll, broke
it, was about to butter it when I saw that my hand was shaking. A moment later
I realized that this was because I wanted to strangle her.
So I took a deep breath and let it go, had another drink of
wine. An appetizer plate appeared before me, and a faint aroma of garlic and
various tantalizing herbs told me to be calm. I nodded thanks to Mandor, and
Jasra did the same. A moment later I buttered the roll.
Several mouthfuls after that, I said, I confess that I do
not understand. You say that Melman was to play a part in my ritual slaying-but
only a part?
She continued eating for a half minute or so, then found
another smile.
It was too appropriate an opportunity to pass up, she told
me then, when you broke up with Julia and she grew interested in the occult. I
saw that I would have to get her together with Victor, to have him train her,
to teach her a few simple effects, to capitalize on her unhappiness at your
parting, to turn it into a full-blown hatred so intense that she would be
willing to cut your throat when the time came for the sacrifice.
I choked on something which otherwise tasted wonderful.
A frosty crystal goblet of water appeared beside my right
hand. I raised it and washed everything down. I took another sip.
Ah, that reaction is worth something, anyhow, Jasra
remarked. You must admit that having someone you once loved as executioner
adds spice to vengeance.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw that Mandor was nodding. And
I, also, had to agree that she was right.
I must acknowledge it as a well-conceived bit of revenge,
I said. Was Rinaldo in on this part?
No, you two had grown too chummy by then. I was afraid he'd
warn you.
I thought about it for another minute or so, then, What
went wrong? I asked.
The one thing I'd never have guessed, she said. Julia
really had talent. A few lessons from Victor, and she was better than he was at
anything he could do-except painting. Hell! Maybe she paints, too. I don't
know. I'd dealt myself a wild card, and it played itself.
I shuddered. I thought of my conversation with the ty'iga at
Arbor Horse, back when it was possessing Vinta Bayle. Did Julia develop the
abilities she sought? it had asked me. I'd told it that I didn't know. I'd
said that she'd never shown any signs... And shortly thereafter I'd remembered
our meeting in the supermarket parking lot and the dog she told to sit that may
never have moved again... I'd recalled this, but
And you never noticed any indication of her talent? Jasra
ventured.
I wouldn't say that, I replied as I began to realize why
things were as they were. No, I wouldn't say that.
... Like that time at Baskin-Robbins when she caused a
change of flavors 'twixt cone and lip. Or the storm she'd stayed dry in without
an umbrella...
She frowned a puzzled frown and narrowed her eyes as she
stared. I don't understand, she said. If you knew, you could have trained
her yourself: She was in love with you. You would have been a formidable team.
I writhed internally She was right, and I had suspected, had
probably even known, but I'd been suppressing it. I'd possibly even triggered
its onset myself, with that shadow walk, with my body energies...
It's tricky, I said, and very personal.
Oh. Matters of the heart are either very simple or totally
inscrutable to me, she said. There doesn't seem to be a middle ground.
Let's stipulate simple, I told her. We were already
breaking up when I noticed the signs, and I'd no desire to call up the power in
an ex-lover who might one day want to practice on me.
Understandable, Jasra said. Very. And ironic in the
extreme.
Indeed, Mandor observed, and with a gesture he caused more
steaming dishes to appear before us. Before you get carried away with a
narrative of intrigue and the underside of the psyche, I'd like you to try a
little breast of quail drowned in Mouton Rothschild, with a bit of wild rice
and a few amusing asparagus tips.
I had driven her to her studies by showing her another layer
of reality, I realized. And I had driven her away from me because I had not
really trusted her enough to tell her the truth about myself. I suppose this
said something about my capacity for love as well as trust. But I had felt this
all along. There was something else. There was more...
This is delicious, Jasra announced.
Thank you. He rose, rounded the table, and refilled her glass
manually rather than use a levitation trick. As he did, I noticed that the
fingers of his left hand lightly brushed her bare shoulder. He sloshed a little
into my glass as an afterthought then and went back and sat down.
Yes, excellent, I observed as I continued my quick
introspect through the dark glass suddenly cleared.
I had felt something, had suspected something from the
beginning, I knew now. Our shadow walk was only the most spectacular of a
series of small, off the-cuff tests I had occasionally thrown her way, hoping
to catch her off guard, hoping to expose her as what? Well, a potential
sorceress. So?
I set my utensils aside and rubbed my eyes. It was near,
though I'd been hiding it from myself for a long while...
Is something the matter, Merlin? I heard Jasa asking.
No. Just realized I was a little tired, I said. Everything's
fine.
A sorceress. Not just a potential sorceress. There had been
the buried fear, I now understood, that she was behind the April 30 attempts on
my life-and I had suppressed this and kept on caring for her. Why? Because I
knew and did not care? Because she was my Nimue? Because I had cherished my
possible destroyer and hidden evidence from myself? Because I'd not only loved
unwisely but had had one big death wish following me around, grinning, and any
time now I might cooperate with it to the utmost?
I'll be okay, I said. It's really nothing.
Did it mean that I was, as they say, my own worst enemy? I
hoped not. I didn't really have time to go through therapy, not when my life
depended on so many external things as well.
A penny for your thoughts, Jasra said sweetly.
II
They're priceless, I answered. Like your jokes. I must
applaud you. Not only did I know nothing of this at the time, but I didn't make
any correct guesses when I did have a few facts to rub together. Is that what
you wanted to hear?
Yes, she said.
I'm pleased there came a point where things went wrong for
you, I added.
She sighed, nodded, took a drink of wine.
Yes, it came, she acknowledged. I was hardly expecting
any recoil from such a simple bit of business. I still find it hard to believe
that there's that much irony running around loose in the world.
If you want me to appreciate the whole thing, you're going
to have to be a little more explicit, I suggested.
I know. In a way, I hate trading that vaguely puzzled
expression you're wearing for one of delight at my own discomfort. On the other
hand, there may still be material able to distress you in some fresh fashion on
the other side of it. .
Win a few, lose a few, I said. I'm willing to bet there
are still features of those days that puzzle you.
Such as? she asked.
Such as why none of those April thirtieth attempts on my
life succeeded.
I assume Rinaldo sabotaged me some way, tipped you off.
Wrong.
What, then?
The ty'iga. She's under a compulsion to protect me. You
might recall her from those days, as she resided is the body of Gail Lampron.
Gail? Rinaldo's girlfriend? My son was dating a demon?
Let's not be prejudiced. He'd done a lot worse his freshman
year.
She thought a moment, then nodded slowly.
You've got a point there, she admitted. I'd forgotten
Carol. And you still have no idea-beyond what the thing admitted back in
Amber-as to why this was going on?
I still don't know, I said.
It casts that entire period in an even stranger light, she
mused, especially since our paths have crossed again. I wonder..?
What?
Whether she was there to protect you or to thwart me-your
bodyguard or my curse?
Hard to say, since the results came to the same thing.
But she's apparently been hanging around you most recently,
which would seem to indicate the former.
Unless, of course, she knows something we don't.
Such as?
Such as the possibility of a conflict developing between us
again.
She smiled.
You should have gone to law school, she said. You're as
devious as your relatives back in Amber. I can be truthful, though, in saying I
have nothing planned that could be taken that way.
I shrugged.
Just a thought. Please continue with Julia's story. She
proceeded to eat several mouthfuls. I kept her company, then discovered I could
not stop eating. I glanced at Mandor, but he remained inscrutable. He'll never
admit to magically enhancing a flavor or laying a compulsion on diners to clean
their plates. Either way, we did finish the course before she spoke again. And
I could hardly complain, considering.
Julia studied with a variety of teachers after you two
broke up, she began. Once I hit upon my plan, it was a simple matter to cause
them to do or say things which would disillusion or discourage her and set her
to looking for someone else. It was not long before she came to Victor, who was
already under our tutelage. I ordered him to sweeten her stay and to skip many
of the usual preliminaries and to proceed to teaching her about an initiation I
had chosen for her-
That being? I interrupted. There are an awful lot of
initiations around, with a variety of specialized ends.
She smiled and nodded, breaking a roll and buttering it.
I led her myself through a version of my own-the Way of the
Broken Pattern.
Sounds like something dangerous from the Amber end of
Shadow.
I can't fault your geography, she said. But it is not all
that dangerous if you know what you're doing.
It is my understanding, I said, that those Shadow worlds
which contain shadows of the Pattern can only hold imperfect versions and that
this always represents a hazard.
It is a hazard only if one does not know how to deal with
it.
And you had Julia walk this-Broken Pattern?
My knowledge of what you refer to as walking the Pattern is
restricted to what my late husband and Rinaldo have told me of it. I believe
that you follow the lines from a definite external beginning to an interior
point where the power comes to you?
Yes, I acknowledged.
In the Way of the Broken Pattern, she explained, you
enter through the imperfection and make your way to the center.
How can you follow the lines if they are broken or
imperfect? The real Pattern would destroy you if you departed the design.
You don't follow the lines. You follow the interstices,
she said.
And when you emerge... wherever? I asked.
You bear the image of the Broken Pattern within you.
And how do you conjure with this?
Through the imperfection. You summon the image, and it is
like a dark well from which you draw power.
And how do you travel among shadows?
Much as you do-as I understand it, she said. But the
break is always with you.
The break? I don't understand.
The flaw in the Pattern. It follows you through Shadow. It
is always there beside you as you travel, sometimes as a hair-fine crack,
sometimes a great chasm. It shifts about; it may appear suddenly, anywhere-a
lapse in reality. This is the hazard for those of the Broken Way. To fall into
it is the final death.
It must lie within all of your spells then also, like a
booby trap.
All occupations have their hazards, she said. Avoiding
them is a part of the art.
And this is the initiation through which you took Julia?
Yes.
And Victor?
Yes.
I understand what you are saying, I replied, but you must
realize that the broken Patterns are drawing their power from the real one.
Of course. What of it? The image is almost as good as the
real thing, if you're careful.
For the record, how many useful images are there?
Useful?
They must degenerate from shadow to shadow. Where do you
draw the line and say, 'Beyond this broken image I will not risk breaking my
neck'?
I see what you mean. You can work with perhaps the first
nine. I've never gone farther out. The first three are best. The circle of the
next three is still manageable. The next three are a lot riskier.
A bigger chasm for each?
Exactly.
Why are you giving me all this esoteric information?
You're a higher-level initiate, so it doesn't matter. Also,
there is nothing you could do to affect the setup. And finally, you need to
know this to appreciate the rest of the story.
All right, I said.
Mandor tapped the table, and small crystal cups of lemon
sherbet appeared before us. We took the hint and cleared our palates before
resuming the conversation. Outside, the shadows of clouds slid across the
mountain slopes. A faint music drifted into the room from somewhere far back
along the corridor. Clinking and scraping noises, sounding like distant
pick-and-shovel work, came to us from somewhere outside-most likely at the
Keep.
So you initiated Julia, I prompted.
Yes, Jasra said.
What happened then?
She learned to summon the image of the Broken Pattern and
use it for magical sight and the hanging of spells. She learned to draw raw
power through the break in it. She learned to find her way through Shadow-
While minding the chasm? I suggested.
Just so, and she had a definite knack for it. She'd a flair
for everything, as a matter of fact.
I'm amazed that a mortal can traverse even a broken image
of the Pattern and live.
Only a few of them do, Jasra said. The others step on a
line or die mysteriously in the broken area. Ten percent make it, maybe. That
isn't bad. Keeps it somewhat exclusive. Of them, only a few can learn the
proper mantic skills to amount to anything as an adept.
And you say that she was actually better than Victor, once
she knew what she was about?
Yes. I didn't appreciate just how good until it was too
late.
I felt her gaze upon me, as if she were checking for a
reaction. I glanced up from my food and cocked an eyebrow.
Yes, she went on, apparently satisfied. You didn't know
that was Julia you were stabbing back at the Fount, did you?
No, I admitted. I'd been puzzled by Mask all along. I
couldn't figure any motive for whatever was going on. The flowers were an
especially odd touch, and I never really understood whether it was you or Mask
behind the bit with the blue stones.
She laughed.
The blue stones, and the cave they come from, are something
of a family secret. The material is a kind of magical insulator, but two
pieces-once together-maintain a link, by which a sensitive person can hold one
and track the other-
Through Shadow?
Yes.
Even if the person doing the tracking otherwise has no
special abilities along these lines?
Even so, she said. It's similar to following a shadow
shifter while she's shifting. Anyone can do it if she's quick enough, sensitive
enough. This just extends the practice a little further. It's following the
shifter's trail rather than the shifter herself.
Herself, herself... You trying to tell me it's been pulled
on you?
'That's right.
I looked up in time to see her blush.
Julia? I said.
You begin to understand.
No, I said. Well, maybe a little. She was more talented
than you'd anticipated. You already told me that. I get the impression she
suckered you on something. But I'm not sure where or how.
I brought her here, Jasra said, to pick up some equipment
I wanted to take along to the first circle of shadows near Amber. She did have
a look at my workroom in the Keep at that time. And perhaps I was overly
communicative then. But how was I to know she was making mental notes and
probably formulating a plan? I'd felt her too cowed to entertain such thoughts.
I must admit she was a pretty good actress.
I read Victor's diary, I said. I take it you were masked
or hooded and possibly using some sort of voicedistorting spell the whole
time?
Yes, but rather than awe Julia into submission, I think I
roused her cupidity for things magical. I believe she picked up one of my
tragoliths-the blue stones-at that time. The rest is history.
Not for me.
A bowl of totally unfamiliar but delicious-smelling
vegetables appeared, steaming, before me.
Think about it.
You took her to the Broken Pattern and conducted her
initiation... I began.
Yes.
The first chance she had, I continued, she used the...
tragolith to return to the Keep and learn some of your other secrets.
Jasra applauded softly, sampled the veggies, quickly ate
more. Mandor smiled.
Beyond that I draw a blank, I admitted.
Be a good boy and eat your vegetables, she said.
I obeyed.
Basing my conclusions concerning this remarkable tale
solely upon my experience of human nature, Mandor suddenly observed, I would
say that she wished to test her talons as well as her wings. I'd guess she went
back and challenged her former master-this Victor Melman-and fought a sorcerous
duel with him.
I heard Jasra's intake of breath.
Is that truly only a guess? she asked.
Truly, he answered, swirling his wine in his goblet.
And I would guess further that you had once done something
similar with your own teacher.
What devil told you that? she asked.
It is only a guess that Sharu was your teacher-and perhaps
more than that, he said. But it would' explain both your acquisition of this
place and your ability to catch its former lord off guard. He might even have
had a stray moment before his defeat for a wishful curse that the same fate
attend you one day. And even if not, these things do sometimes have a way of
running full circle with people in our trade.
She chuckled.
The devil called Reason, then, she said, a note of
admiration in her voice. Yet you summon him by intuition, which makes it an
art.
It is good to know he still comes when I call. I take it
Julia was surprised, however, by Victor's ability to thwart her.
True. She did not anticipate that we tend to wrap
apprentices in a layer or two of protection.
Yet her own defenses obviously proved adequate-at least.
True. Though that, of course, was tantamount to defeat. For
she knew that I would learn of her rebellion and come soon to discipline her.
Oh, I observed:
Yes, she stated. That is why she faked her death, which I
must admit had me completely fooled for a long while.
I recalled the day I had visited Julia's apartment, found
the body, been attacked by the beast. The corpse's face had been partly
destroyed, the remaining features gory. But the lady had been the right size,
and general resemblances had jibed. And she had been in the right place. And
then I had become the object of the lurking doglike creature's attention, which
had distracted me more than a little from the minutiae of identity. By the time
my struggle for my life was concluded, to the accompaniment of approaching sirens,
I was more interested in flight than in further investigation. Thereafter,
whenever I had returned in memory to that scene, it was Julia dead whom I
beheld.
Incredible, I said. Then whose body was it that I found?
I've no idea, she replied. It could have been one of her
own shadow selves or some stranger off the street. Or a corpse stolen from the
morgue. I've no way of knowing.
It was wearing one of your blue stones.
Yes. And its mate was on the collar of the beast you
slew-and she opened the way for it to come through.
Why? And why all that business with the Dweller on the
Threshold as well?
Red herring of the first water. Victor thought I'd killed
her, and I thought he had. He assumed I'd opened a way from the Keep and sent
the heating beast after her. I guessed he'd done it, and I was irritated he'd
hidden his rapid development from me. Such things seldom bode well.
I nodded.
You breed those creatures around here?
Yes, she replied, and I show them, too, in several
adjacent shadows. I've a number who've taken blue ribbons.
I'll stick with pit bulls, I said. They're a lot cuter
and better behaved. So, she left a body and a hidden corridor to this place,
and you thought Victor had done her in and was setting things up for a raid on
your sanctum sanctorum.
More or less.
And he thought she'd become sufficiently dangerous to
you-as with the corridor-that you'd killed her?
I don't really know that he ever found the corridor. It was
fairly well hidden, as you learned. Either way, neither of us was aware of what
she'd really done.
That being?
She'd also planted a piece of tragolith on me. Later, after
the initiation, she used its mate to track me through Shadow to Begma.
Begma? What the hell were you doing there?
Nothing important, she said. I mention it only to show
her subtlety. She did not approach me at that time. I know of it, in fact, only
because she told me of it later. She trailed me then from the perimeter of the
Golden Circle back here to the Citadel. The rest you know.
I'm not sure that I do.
She had designs on this place. When she surprised me, I was
surprised indeed. It was how I became a coatrack.
And she took over here, donning a goalie mask for public
relations purposes. She dwelled here for a time, building her powers,
increasing her skills, hanging umbrellas on you-
Jasra growled softly, and I remembered that her bite was
worse. I hastened into a fresh area of speculation. I still don't understand
why she spied on me on occasion and sometimes threw flowers.
Men are exasperating, Jasra said, raising her wineglass
and draining it. You've managed to understand everything but her motive.
She was on a power trip, I said. What's to understand
past that? I even recall a long discussion we once had concerning power.
I heard Mandor chuckle. When I glanced at him, he looked
away, shaking his head.
Obviously, Jasra said, she still cared about you. Most
likely, a great deal. She was playing games with you. She wanted to rouse your
curiosity. She wanted you to come after her, to find her, and she probably
wanted to try her power against your own. She wanted to show you that she was
worthy of all those things you'd denied her when you denied her your
confidence.
So you know about that, too.
There were times when she spoke freely to me.
So she cared for me so well that she sent men with
tragoliths to track me to Amber and try to slay me. They almost succeeded,
too.
Jasra looked away, coughed. Mandor immediately rose, circled
the table, and refilled her goblet, interposing himself between us. At that
time, while she was wholly blocked from my sight, I heard her say softly,
Well, not exactly. The assassins were... mine. Rinaldo wasn't around to warn
you, as I'd guessed he was doing, and I thought I'd have one more shot at you.
Oh, I observed. Any more wandering around out there?
They were the last, she said.
That's a comfort.
I'm not apologizing. I'm just explaining, to clear our
differences. Are you willing to cancel this account, too? I've got to know.
I already said I was willing to call things even. It still
goes. Where does Jurt come into all this? I don't understand how they got
together and what they are to each other.
Mandor added a touch of wine to my own glass before
returning to his seat. Jasra met my eyes.
I don't know, she said. She had no allies when we fought.
It had to have happened while I was rigid.
Have you any idea where she and Jurt might have fled?
No.
I glanced at Mandor, and he shook his head.
Neither have I, he said. However, a peculiar thought has
occurred to me.
Yes?
Besides the fact that he has negotiated the Logrus and come
into his powers, is it necessary for me to point out that Jurt-apart from his
scars and missing pieces bears you a strong resemblance?
Jurt? Me? You've got to be kidding!
He glanced at Jasra.
He is right, she said. It's obvious that the two of you
are related.
I put down my fork and shook my head.
Preposterous, I said, more in self-defense than as a
matter of certainty. I never noticed.
Mandor shrugged, very slightly.
You want a lecture on the psychology of denial? Jasra
asked me.
No, I said. I want a little while in which to let this
sink in.
Time for another course anyway, Mandor announced, and he
gestured widely and it was delivered.
Will you be in trouble with your relatives for having
released me? Jasra asked after a while.
By the time they realize you're gone, I hope to have a good
story ready, I answered.
In other words, you will be, she said.
Maybe a little.
I'll see what I can do.
What do you mean?
I don't like to be obligated to anyone, she said, and
you've done more for me than I have for you in this. If I come upon a means of
turning their wrath away from you, I'll employ it.
What could you possibly have in mind?
Let it go at that. Sometimes it's better not to know too
much.
I don't like the sound of this at all.
An excellent reason for changing the subject, she said. How
great an enemy has Jurt become?
To me? I asked. Or are you wondering whether he'll be
returning here for second helpings?
Both, when you put it that way
I believe he'll kill me if he can, I said, glancing at
Mandor, who nodded.
I fear that is so, he stated.
As for whether he'll be back here for more of whatever it
is that he got, I continued, you're the best judge. How close did he seem to
be to possessing the full powers one might gain from that ritual at the
Fountain?
It's hard to say exactly, she said, as he was testing
them under very chaotic conditions. Fifty percent, maybe. Just a guess. Will
that satisfy him?
Perhaps. How dangerous does that make him?
Very When he gets the full hang of things. Still, he must
realize that this place will be heavily guarded even against someone such as
himself-should he decide to return. I suspect he'll stay away. Just Sharu-in
his present circumstances-would be a formidable obstacle.
I went on eating.
Julia will probably advise him not to try it, she
continued, familiar as she is with the place.
I nodded my acceptance of the notion. We would meet when we
met. Nothing much I could do now to forestall it.
Now may I ask you a question? she said.
Go ahead.
The ty'iga...
Yes.
Even in the body of the duke Orkuz's daughter, I am certain
that she did not just walk into the palace and wander on up to your
apartments.
Hardly, I replied. She's with an official party.
May I ask when the party arrived?
Earlier in the day, I answered. I'm afraid, though, that
I can't go into any detail as to-
She dipped her well-ringed hand in a gesture of denial.
I'm not interested in state secrets, she said, though I
know Nayda usually accompanies her father in a secretarial capacity.
So?
Did her sister come along or did she stay home?
That would be Coral, wouldn't it? I asked.
Yes.
She did, I replied.
Thank you, she said, and returned to her food.
Damn. What was that about? Did she know something concerning
Coral that I didn't? Something that might bear on her present, indeterminate
state? If so, what might it cost me to find out?
Why? I said then.
Just curious, she replied. I knew the family in...
happier times.
Jasra sentimental? Never. What then?
Supposing the family had a problem or two? I asked.
Apart from Nayda's possession by the ty'iga?
Yes, I said.
I would be sorry to hear that, she said. What problem?
Just a little captivity thing involving Coral.
There came a small clatter as she dropped her fork and it
fell upon her plate.
What are you talking about? she asked.
A misplacement, I said.
Of Coral? How? Where?
It depends partly on how much you really know abort her, I
explained.
I'm fond of the girl. Don't toy with me. What happened?
More than a little puzzling. But not the answer I was after.
You knew her mother pretty well?
Kinta. I'd met her, at diplomatic functions. Lovely lady.
Tell me about her father.
Well, he's a member of the royal house, but of a branch not
in the line of succession. Before he was prime minister, Orkuz was the Begman
ambassador to Kashfa. His family was in residence with him, so naturally I saw
him at any number of affairs-
She looked up when she realized I was staring at her through
the Sign of the Logrus, across her Broken Pattern. Our eyes met, and she
smiled.
Oh. You did ask about her father, she said. Then she
paused, and I nodded. So there's truth in that rumor, she observed at last.
You didn't really know?
There are so many rumors in the world, most of them
impossible to check. How am I to know which of them hold truth? And why should
I care?
You're right, of course, I said. Nevertheless...
Another of the old boy's by-blows, she said. Does anyone
keep score? It's a wonder he had any time for affairs of state.
Anyone's guess, I said.
To be frank then, in addition to knowing the rumor I'd
heard, there was indeed a family resemblance. I couldn't judge on that count,
though, not being personally acquainted with most of the family. You're saying
there's truth in it?
Yes.
Just because of the resemblance, or is there something
more?
Something more.
She smiled sweetly and retrieved her fork.
I've always enjoyed that fairy-tale revelation which sees
one rise in the world.
I also, I said, and I resumed eating.
Mandor cleared his throat.
It seems hardly fair, he said, to tell only part of a
story.
You're right, I agreed.
Jasra returned her gaze to me and sighed.
All right, she said, I'll ask. How did you know for
cer-Oh. Of course. The Pattern.
I nodded.
Well, well, well. Little Coral, Mistress of the Pattern. This
was a fairly recent occurrence?
Yes.
I suppose she is off somewhere in Shadow now-celebrating.
I wish I knew.
What do you mean?
She's gone, but I don't know where. And it's the Pattern
that did it to her.
How?
Good question. I don't know.
Mandor cleared his throat.
Merlin, he said, perhaps there are some matters he
rotated his left hand that on reflection you may wish-
No, I said. Ordinarily discretion would rule-perhaps even
with you, my brother, as a Lord of Chaos. And certainly in the case of Your
Highness"-I nodded to Jasra-"save that you are acquainted and may
even have a touch of affection for the lady. I decided against laying it on
too thick and quickly added, Or at least no malice toward her.
As I said, I'm very fond of the girl, Jasra stated,
leaning forward.
Good, I replied, for I feel at least partly responsible
for what happened, even though I was duped in the matter. So I feel obliged to
try to set things right. Only I don't know how.
What happened? she asked.
I was entertaining her when she expressed a desire to see
the Pattern. So I obliged her. On the way she asked me questions about it. It
seemed harmless conversation, and I satisfied her curiosity. I was not familiar
with the rumors concerning her parentage, or I would have suspected something. As
it was, when we got there, she set foot upon the Pattern and commenced walking
it.
Jasra sucked in her breath.
It would destroy one not of the blood, she said. Correct?
I nodded.
Or even one of us, I said then, if any of a number of
mistakes be made.
Jasra chuckled.
Supposing her mother'd really been carrying on with a
footman or the cook? she remarked.
She's a wise daughter, I said. At any rate, once one
begins the Pattern, one may not turn back. I was obliged to instruct her as she
went along. That, or be a very poor host and doubtless damage Begman-Amber
relations.
And spoil all sorts of delicate negotiations? she asked,
half seriously.
I'd a feeling just then that she'd welcome a digression
concerning the exact nature of the Begman visit, but I wasn't biting.
You might say that, I said. At any rate, she completed
the Pattern, and then it took her away.
My late husband told me that from its center one can
command the Pattern to deliver one anywhere.
True, I said, but it was the nature of her command that
was a bit unusual. She told the Pattern to send her wherever it wanted.
I'm afraid I don't understand.
Neither do I, but she did, and it did.
You mean she just said, `Send me wherever you want to send
me,' and she was instantly dispatched for points unknown?
You've got it.
That would seem to imply some sort of intelligence on the
part of the Pattern.
Unless, of course, it was responding to an unconscious
desire on her part to visit some particular locale.
True. I suppose there is that possibility. But have you no
means of tracing her?
I'd a Trump I'd done of her. When I tried it, I reached
her. She seemed pent in a dark place. Then we lost touch, and that's it.
How long ago was this?
A matter of hours by my subjective reckoning, I said. Is
this place on anything near Amber time?
Close enough, I believe. Why didn't you try again?
I've been somewhat occupied ever since Also, I've been
casting about for some alternate way of approaching this.
There came a clinking, rattling sound, and I smelled coffee.
If you're asking whether I'll help you, Jasra said, the
answer is yes. Only I don't really know how to go about it. Perhaps if you were
to try her Trump again with me backing you-we might reach her.
All right, I said, lowering my cup and fumbling forth the
cards. Let's give it a try.
I will assist you also, Mandor stated, rising to his feet
and coming to stand to my right.
Jasra came over and stood to my left. I held the Trump so
that we all had a clear view.
Let us begin, I said, and I moved forward with my mind.
III
A patch of light I had taken to be a stray sunbeam drifted
from its position on the floor to a spot beside my coffee cup. It was
ring-shaped, and I decided not to remark upon it since neither of the others
seemed to take note of it.
I reached after Coral and found nothing. I felt Jasra and
Mandor reaching also, and I tried again, joining forces with them. Harder.
Something? Something... I recalled wondering what Vialle
felt when she used the Trumps. It had to be something other than the visual
cues with which the rest of us were familiar. It might be something like this.
Something. What I felt was a sense of Coral's presence. I
regarded her form upon the card, but it would not come alive. The card itself
had grown perceptibly cooler, but it was not the same ice-edged chill I
normally felt on achieving communication with one of the others. I tried
harder. I felt Mandor and Jasra increasing their efforts also.
Then Coral's image on the card faded, but nothing came to
replace it. I sensed her presence, however, as I regarded the void. The feeling
came closest to that of attempting to make contact with someone who was asleep.
I cannot tell whether it's simply a difficult place to
reach, Mandor began, or-
I believe she is under a spell, Jasra announced.
That could account for a part of it, Mandor said.
But only part, came a soft, familiar voice from near at
hand. There are awesome powers holding her, Dad. I've never seen anything like
this before.
The Ghostwheel is right, Mandor said. I'm beginning to
feel it.
Yes, Jasra began, there is something...
And suddenly the veil was pierced, and I beheld the slumped
form of Coral, apparently unconscious, lying upon a dark surface in a very dark
place, the only illumination coming from what seemed a circle of fire drawn
about her. She couldn't have brought me through if she wanted to, and
Ghost, can you take me to her? I asked.
Her image faded before he could reply, and I felt a cold
draft. It was several seconds before I realized that it seemed to be blowing
upon me from the now-icy card.
I don't think so, I wouldn't want to, and it may be that
there is no need, he answered. The force that holds her has become aware of
your interest and even now is reaching toward you. Is there some way you can
turn off that Trump?
I passed my hand across its face, which is usually
sufficient. Nothing happened. The cold breeze even seemed to increase in
intensity. I repeated the gesture along with a mental order. I began to feel
whatever it was, focusing upon me.
Then the Sign of the Logrus fell upon the Trump, and the
card was torn from my hand as I was cast backward, striking my shoulder against
the edge of the door. Mandor lurched to his right as this occurred, catching
hold of the table to steady himself. In my Logrus vision I had seen wild lines
of light flash outward from the card before it fell away.
Did that do the trick? I called out.
It broke the connection, Ghost replied.
Thanks, Mandor, I said.
But the power that was reaching for you through the Trump
knows where you are now, Ghost said.
What makes you privy to its awareness? I inquired.
It is a surmise, based upon the fact that it's still
reaching for you. It is coming the long way roundacross space-though. It could
take as long as a quarter of a minute before it reaches you.
Your use of the pronoun is a little indefinite, Jasra
said. Is it just Merlin that it wants? Or is it coming for all of us?
Uncertain. Merlin is the focus. I've no idea what it will
do to you.
I lurched forward during this exchange and retrieved Coral's
Trump.
Can you protect us? she asked.
I've already begun transferring Merlin to a distant place. Shall
I do this for you also?
As I looked up from pocketing the Trump, I noted that the
chamber had become something less than substantial-translucent, as if
everything were made of colored glass.
Please, the cathedral-window form of Jasra said softly.
Yes, came my fading brother's faint echo.
Then I was passed through a fiery hoop into a place of
darkness. I stumbled against a stone wall, felt my way along it. A quarter
turn, a lighter area before me dotted with bright points...
Ghost? I asked.
No answer.
I don't appreciate these interrupted conversations, I
continued.
I moved forward until I came to what was obviously a cave
mouth. A clear night sky hung before me, and when I stepped outside a cold wind
rubbed up against me. I retreated several paces, shivering.
I had no idea where I might be. Not that it really mattered
if it brought me a breathing spell. I reached through the Logrus Sign for a
great distance before I located a heavy blanket. Wrapping it about myself, I
sank to a seated position upon the cave's floor. Then I reached again. It was
easier to find a stack of wood and no trick at all to ignite a portion of it. I'd
also been looking forward to one more cup of coffee. I wondered...
Why not? I reached again, and the bright circle rolled into
view before me.
Dad! Please stop! came the offended voice. I've gone to a
lot of trouble to tuck you away in this obscure corner of Shadow. Too many
sendings, though, and you'll call attention to yourself.
Come on! I said. All I want is a cup of coffee.
I'll get one for you. Just don't use your own powers for a
while.
Why won't your action draw just as much attention?
I'm using a roundabout route. There!
A steaming mug of some dark stoneware stood on the floor of
the cave near my right hand.
Thanks, I said, taking it up and sniffing it. What did
you do with Jasra and Mandor?
I sent each of you off in a different direction amidst a
horde of fake images flitting hither and yon. All you have to do now is lie low
for a while. Let its attention subside.
Whose attention? What's attention?
The power that has Coral. We don't want it to find us.
Why not? I seem to recall your wondering earlier whether
you were a god. What's for you to fear?
The real thing. It seems to be stronger than I am. On the
other hand, I seem to be faster.
That's something, anyway
Get a good night's sleep. I'll let you know is the morning
whether it's still hunting you.
Maybe I'll find out for myself.
Don t go manifesting unless it's a matter of life or
death.
That wasn't what I meant. Supposing it finds me?
Do whatever seems appropriate.
Why do I have a feeling you're keeping things from me?
I guess you're just suspicious by nature, Dad. It seems to
run in your family I've got to go now.
Where? I asked.
Check on the others. Run a few errands. See to my personal
development. Check my experiments. Things like that. Bye. `
What about Coral?
But the circle of light which had hovered before me spun
from brightness to dimness and vanished. An unarguable end to the conversation.
Ghost was getting more and more like the rest of us-sneaky and misleading.
I sipped the coffee. Not as good as Mandor's, but
acceptable. I began wondering where Jasra and Mandor had been sent. I decided
against trying to reach them. In fact, it might not be a bad idea, I decided,
to fortify my own position against magical intrusion.
I resummoned the Sign of the Logrus, which I had let slip
while Ghost was transporting me. I used it to set wards at the cave mouth and
about my situation within. Then I released it and took another sip. As I did, I
realized that this coffee could not possibly keep me awake. I was coming off a
nervous jag, and the weight of all my activities was suddenly heavy upon me. Two
more sips, and I could hardly hold the cup. Another, and I noticed that each
time I blinked my eyelids were closing a lot more easily than they opened.
I set the cup aside, drew my blanket more tightly about me,
and found a relatively comfortable position on the stone floor, having become something
of an expert on the activity back in the crystal cave. The flickering flames
mustered shadow armies behind my eyelids. The fire popped like a clash of arms;
the air smelled of pitch.
I went away. Sleep is perhaps the only among life's great
pleasures which need not be of short duration. It filled me, and I drifted. How
far and for how long, I cannot say.
Nor can I say
what it was that roused me. I know only that I was somewhere else and the next
moment I had returned. My position had changed slightly, my toes were cold, and
I felt that I was no longer alone. I kept my eyes closed, and did not alter my
breathing pattern. It could be that Ghost had simply decided to look in on me.
It could also be that something was testing my wards.
I raised my eyelids
but the smallest distance, peering outward and upward through a screen of
eyelashes. A small misshaped figure stood outside the cave mouth, the fire's
remaining glow faintly illuminating his strangely familiar face. There was
something of myself in those features and something of my father.
Merlin, he said
softly. Come awake now. You've places to go and things to do.
I opened my eyes
wide and stared. He fitted a certain description... Frakir throbbed, and I
stroked her still.
Dworkin..? I
said.
He chuckled.
You've named
me, he replied.
He paced, from
one side of the cave mouth to the other, occasionally pausing to extend a hand
partway toward me. Each time he hesitated and drew it back.
What is it? I
asked. What's the matter? Why are you here?
I've come to
fetch you back to the journey you abandoned.
And what journey
might that be?
Your search for
the lady somewhere astray who walked the Pattern t'other day
Coral? You know
where she is?
He raised his
hand, lowered it, gnashed his teeth.
Coral? Is that
her name? Let me in. We must discuss her.
We seem to be
talking just fine the way we are.
Have you no
respect for an ancestor?
I do. But I also
have a shapeshifting brother who'd like to mount my head and hang it on the
wall of his den. And he might just be able to do it real quick if I give him
half a chance. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, my wits finishing the job of
reassembling themselves. So where's Coral?
Come. I will
show you the way, he said, reaching forward. This time his hand passed my ward
and was immediately outlined in fire. He did not seem to notice. His eyes were
a pair of dark stars, drawing me to my feet, pulling me toward him. His hand
began to melt. The flesh ran and dripped away like wax. There were no bones
within, but rather an odd geometry-as if someone had sketched a hand quickly in
a three-dimensional medium, then molded some fleshlike cover for it. Take my
hand.
I found myself
raising my hand against my will, reaching toward the fingerlike curves, the
swirls of the knuckles. He chuckled again. I could feel the force that drew me.
I wondered what would happen if I took hold of that strange hand in a special
way.
So I summoned the
Sign of the Logrus and sent it on ahead to do my handclasping for me.
This may not have
been my best choice of actions. I was momentarily blinded by the brilliant,
sizzling flash that followed. When my vision cleared, I saw that Dworkin was
gone. A quick check showed that my wards still held. I perked up the fire with
a short, simple spell, noted that my coffee cup was half full, and warmed its
tepid contents with an abbreviated version of the same rendering. I reshrouded
myself then, settled, and sipped. Analyze as I might, I couldn't figure what
had just happened.
I knew of no one
who had seen the half mad demiurge in years, though according to my father's
tale, Dworkin's mind should have been largely mended whet Oberon repaired the
Pattern. If it had really been Jurt, seeking to trick his way into my presence
and finish me off, it was an odd choice of form for him to assume. Come to
think of it, I wasn't at all certain that Jurt even knew what Dworltin looked
like. I debated the wisdom of calling for Ghostwheel to solicit an inhuman
opinion on the matter. Before I could decide, however, the stars beyond the
cave mourh were occulted by another figure, much larger than
Dworkin's-heroically proportioned even.
A single step
brought it within range of the firelight, and I spilled coffee when I beheld
that face. We had never met, but I had seen his likeness in many places in
Castle Amber.
I understand
that Oberon died in redrawing the Pattern, I said.
Were you present
at the time? he asked.
No, I replied,
but coming as you do, on the heels of a rather bizarre apparition of Dworkin,
you must excuse my suspicions as to your bona fides.
Oh, that was a
fake you encountered. I'm the real thing.
What was it then
that I saw?
It was the
astral form of a practical joker-a sorcerer named Jolos from the fourth circle
of Shadow.
Oh, I
responded. And how am I to know you're not the projection of someone named
Jalas from the fifth?
I can recite the
entire genealogy of the royal House of Amber.
So can any good
scribe back home.
I'll throw in
the illegitimates.
How many were
there, anyway?
Forty-seven,
that I know of.
Aw, come on!
How'd you manage?
Different time
streams, he said, smiling.
If you survived
the reconstruction of the Pattern, how come you didn't return to Amber and
continue your reign? I asked. Why'd you let Random get crowned and muddy the
picture even further?
He laughed.
But I didn't
survive it, he said. I was destroyed in the process. I am a ghost, returned
to solicit a living champion for Amber against the rising power of the Logrus.
Granted,
arguendo, that you are what you say you. are, I replied, you're still in the
wrong neighborhood, sir. I am an initiate of the Logrus and a son of Chaos.
You are also an
initiate of the Pattern and a son of Amber, the magnificent figure answered.
True, I said,
and all the more reason for me not to choose sides.
There comes a
time when a man must choose, he stared, and that time is now. Which side are
you on?
Even if I
believed that you ate what you say, I do not feel obliged to make such a
choice, I said. And there is a tradition in the Courts that Dworkin himself
was an initiate of the Logrus. If that is true, I'm only following in the
footsteps of a venerable ancestor.
But he renounced
Chaos when he founded Amber.
I shrugged.
Good thing I
haven't founded anything, I said. If there is something specific that you
want of me, tell me what it is, give me a good reason for doing it and maybe
I'll cooperate.
He extended his
hand.
Come with me,
and I will set your feet upon the new Pattern you must follow, in a game to be
played out between the Powers.
I still don't
understand you, but I am certain that the real Oberon would not be stopped by
these simple wards. You come to me and clasp my hand, and I will be glad to
accompany you and take a look at whatever it is you want me to see.
He drew himself
up to an even greater height.
You would test
me? he asked.
Yes.
As a man, it
would hardly have troubled me, he stated. But being formed out of this
spiritual crap now, I don't know. I'd rather not take the chance.
In that case, I
must echo your sentiment with respect to your own proposal.
Grandson, he
said levelly, a ruddy light entering his eyes, even dead, none of my spawn may
address me so. I come for thee now in a less than friendly fashion. I come for
thee now, and this journey shall I hale thee amid fires.
I took a step
backward as he advanced.
No need to take
it personally... I began.
I shaded my eyes
as he hit my wards, and the flashbulb effect began. Squinting through it, I saw
something of a repetition of the flensing of Dworkin's flesh by fire. Oberon
became transparent in places; other places he melted. Within him, through him,
as the outward semblance of the kind passed away, I saw the swirls and curves,
the straits and channels-black-lined, geometrizing abstractly inside the
general outline of a large and noble figure. Unlike Dworkin, however, the image
did not fade. Having passed my wards, its movement slowed, it continued toward
me nevertheless, reaching. Whatever its true nature, it was one of the most
frightening things I had ever encountered. I continued to back away, raising my
hands, and I called again upon the Logrus.
The Sign of the
Logrus occurred between us. The abstract version of Oberon continued to reach,
scribbled spirit hands encountering the writhing limbs of Chaos.
I was not
reaching through the Logrus's image to manipulate it against that apparition. I
felt an unusual dread of the thing, even at our distance. What I did was more
on the order of thrusting the Sign against the image of the king. Then I dived
past them both, out the cave mouth, and I rolled, scrabbling for handholds and
toeholds when I struck a slope, coming up hard against a boulder and hugging it
as the cave erupted with the noisy and flash of an ammo dump that had taken a
hit.
I lay there
shuddering, my eyes squeezed shut, for perhaps half a minute. Any second, I
felt, and something would be on my ass-unless, perhaps, I crouched perfectly
still and tried hard to look like another rock...
The silence was
profound, and when I opened my eyes, the light had vanished and the shape of
the cave mouth was unaltered. I rose slowly to my feet, advanced even more slowly.
The Sign of the Logrus had departed, and for reasons I did not understand I was
loath to call it back. When I looked within the cave, there were no signs that
anything at all had occurred, save for the fact that my wards were blown.
I stepped inside.
The blanket still lay where it had fallen. I put out a hand and touched the
wall. Cold stone. That blast must have taken place at some other level than the
immediate. My small fire was still flickering feebly. I recalled it yet again
to life. But the only thing I saw in its glow which I had not seen previously
was my coffee cup, broken where it had fallen.
I let my hand
remain upon the wall. I leaned. After a time, there came an uncontrollable
tightening of my diaphragm. I began laughing. I am not sure why. The weight of
everything which had transpired since April 30 was upon me. It just happened
that laughter had edged out the alternative of beating my breast and howling.
I thought I knew
who all the players were in this complex game. Luke and Jasra seemed to be on
my side now, along with my brother Mandor, who'd always looked out for me. My
mad brother Jurt wanted me dead, and he was now allied with my old lover Julia,
who didn t seem too kindly disposed toward me either. There was the ty'iga-an
overprotective demon inhabiting the body of Coral's sister, Nayda, whom I'd
left sleeping in the midst of a spell back in Amber. There was the mercenary
Dalt who, now I thought of it, was also my uncle-who'd made off with Luke for
points and purposes unknown after kicking Luke's ass in Arden with two armies
watching. He had nasty designs on Amber but lacked the military muscle to
provide more than occasional guerrilla-style annoyance. And then there was
Ghostwheel, my cybernetic Trump dealer and minor-league mechanical demigod, who
seemed to have evolved from rash and manic to rational and paranoid-and I
wasn't at all sure where he was headed from here, but at least he was showing
some filial respect mixed in with the current cowardice.
And that had been
pretty much it.
But these latest
manifestations seemed evidence that there was something else at play here also,
something that wanted to drag me off in yet another direction. I had Ghost's
testimony that it was strong. I had no idea what it really represented. And I had
no desire to trust it. This made for an awkward relationship.
Hey, kid! came
a familiar voice from down the slope. You're a hard man to find. You don't
stay put.
I turned quickly,
moved forward, stared downward.
A lone figure was
toiling up the slope. A big man. Something flashed in the vicinity of his
throat. It was too dark to make out his features.
I retreated
several paces, commencing the spell which would restore my blasted wards.
Hey! Don't run
off! he called. I've got to talk to you.
The wards fell
into place, and I drew my blade and held it, point lowered, at my tight,
entirely out of sight from the cave mouth when I turned my body. I ordered
Frakir to hang invisible from my left hand also. The second figure had been
stronger than the first, to make it past my wards. If this third one should
prove stronger than the second, I was going to need everything I could muster.
Yeah? I called
out. Who are you and what do you want?
Hell! I heard
it say I'm no one in particular. Just your old man. I need some help, and I
like to keep things in the family.
I had to admit,
when it reached the area of firelight, that it was a very good imitation of
Prince Corwin of Amber, my father, complete with black cloak, boots, and
trousers, gray shirt, silver studs, and buckle-and even a silver rose-and he
was smiling that same quirky sort of smile the real Corwin had sometimes worn
on telling me his story, long ago... I felt a kind of wrenching in my guts at
the sight. I'd wanted to get to know him better, but he'd disappeared, and I'd
never been able to find him again. Now, for this thing-whatever it was-to pull
this impersonation... I was more than a little irritated at such a patent
attempt to manipulate my feelings.
The first fake
was Dworkin, I said, and the second was Oberon. You're climbing right down
the family tree, aren't you?
He squinted and
cocked his head in puzzlement as he advanced, another realistic mannerism.
I don't know what
you're talking about, Merlin, he responded. I-
Then it entered
the warded area and jerked as if touching a hot wire.
Holy shit! it
said. You don't trust anybody, do you?
Family
tradition, I replied, backed up by recent experience.
I was puzzled,
though, that the encounter had not involved more pyrotechnics. Also, I wondered
why the thing's transformation into scrollwork had not yet commenced.
With another
oath, it swirled its cloak to the left, wrapping it abut its arm; its right
hand crossed toward an excellent facsimile of my father's scabbard. A
silverchased blade sighed as it arced upward, then fell toward the eye of the
ward. When they met, the sparks rose in a foot-high splash and the blade hissed
as if it had been heated and were now being quenched in water. The design on
the blade flared, and the sparks leaped again this time as high as a man-and in
that instant I felt the ward break.
Then it entered,
and I fumed my body, swinging my blade. But the blade that looked like
Grayswandir fell and rose again, in a tightening circle, drawing my own
weapon's point to the right and sliding straight in toward my breast. I did a
simple parry in quarte, but he slipped under it and was still coming in from
the outside. I parried sixte, but he wasn't there. His movement had been only a
feint. He was back inside and coming in low now. I reversed myself and parried
again as he slid his entire body in to my right, dropping his blade's point,
reversing his grip, fanning my face with his left hand.
Too late I saw
the right hand rising as the left slid behind my head. Grayswandir's pommel was
headed straight for my jaw.
You're
really... I began, and then it connected. The last thing I remember seeing was
the silver rose.
That's life:
Trust and you're betrayed; don't trust and you betray yourself. Like most moral
paradoxes, it places you in an untenable position. And it was too late for my
normal solution. I couldn't walk away from the game.
I woke in a place
of darkness. I woke wondering and wary. As usual when wondering and wary, I lay
perfectly still and let my breathing continue its natural rhythm. And I
listened.
Not a sound.
I opened my eyes
slightly.
Disconcerting
patterns. I closed them again.
I felt with my
body for vibrations within the rocky surface upon which I was sprawled.
No vibes.
I opened my eyes
entirely, fought back an impulse to close them. I raised myself onto my elbows,
then gathered my knees beneath me, straightened my back, turned my head.
Fascinating. I hadn't been this disoriented since I'd gone drinking with Luke
and the Cheshire Cat.
There was no
color anywhere about me. Everything was black, white, or some shade of gray. It
was as if I had entered a photographic negative. What I presumed to be a sun
hung like a black hole several diameters above the horizon to my right. The sky
was a very dark gray, and ebon clouds moved slowly within it. My skin was the
color of ink. The rocky ground beneath me and about me shone an almost
translucent bone-white, however. I rose slowly to my feet, taming. Yes. The
ground seemed to glow, the sky was dark, and I was a shadow between them. I did
not like the feeling at all.
The air was dry,
cool. I stood in the foothills to an albino mountain range, so stark in
appearance as to rouse comparison with the Antarctic. These stretched off and
up to my left. To the right-low and rolling-toward what I guessed to be a
morning sun, lay a black plain. Desert? I had to raise my hand and shade'
against its .. what? Antiglow?
Shit! I tried
saying, and I noticed two things immediately.
The first was
that my word remained unvoiced. The second was that my jaw hurt where my father
or his simulacrum had slugged me.
I repeated my
silent observation and withdrew my Trumps. All bets were off when it came to
messing with sendings. I shuffled out the Trump for the Ghostwheel and focused
my attention upon it.
Nothing. It was
completely dead to me. But, then, it was Ghost who'd told me to lie low, and
maybe he was simply refusing to entertain my calf. I thumbed through the others.
I paused at Flora's. She was usually willing to help me out of a tight spot. I
studied that lovely face, sent out my call to it...
Not a golden curl
stirred. Not a degree's drop in temperature. The card remained a card. I tried
harder, even muttering an enhancement spell. But there was nobody home.
Mandor, then. I
spent several minutes on his card with the same result. I tried Random's.
Ditto. Benedict's, Julian's. No and no. I tried for Fiona, Luke, and Bill Roth.
Three more negatives. I even pulled a couple of the Trumps of Doom, but I
couldn't reach the Sphinx either, or a building of bones atop a green glass
mountain.
I squared them,
cased them, and put them away It was the first time I had encountered a
phenomenon of this sort since the Crystal Cave. Trumps can be blocked in any of
a number of ways, however, and so far as I was concerned, the matter was, at
the moment, academic. I was more concerned about removing myself to a more
congenial environment. I could save the research for some future bit of
leisure.
I began walking.
My footsteps were soundless. When I kicked a pebble and it bounced along before
me, I could detect nothing of sound to its passage.
White to the left
of me, black to the right. Mountains or desert. I turned left, walking. Nothing
else in motion that I could see except for the black, black clouds. To the lee
side of every outcrop a near-blinding area of enhanced brightness: crazy
shadows across a crazy land.
Turn left again.
Three pacer, then round the boulder: Upward. Over the ridge, Turn dounhill.
Turn right, Soon a streak of red amid rocks to the left...
Nope. Next time
then...
Brief twinge in
the frontal sinus. No red. Move on.
Crevice to the
right, next turn...
I massaged my
temples when they began to ache as no crevice was delivered. My breath came
heavy, and I felt moisture upon my brow.
Textures of gray
to green and brittle flowers, slate-blue, low on the next talus slope...
A small pain in
my neck. No flowers. No gray. No green.
Then let the
clouds part and the darkness pour down from the sun...
Nothing
... and a sound
of running water from a small fsream, next gully.
I had to halt. My
head was throbbing; my hands were shaking. I reached out and touched the rock
wall to my left. It felt solid enough. Rampant reality Why was it treading all
over me?
And how had I
gotten here?
And where was
here?
I relaxed. I
slowed my breathing and adjusted my energies. The pains in my head subsided,
ebbed, were gone.
Again I began
walking.
Birdsong and
gentle breeze .. Flower in a crannied nook
No. And the first
twinge of returning resistance... What sort of spell might I be under, that I
had lost my power to walk in Shadow? I had never understood it to be something
that could be taken away.
It's not funny,
I tried saying. Whoever you are, whatever you are, how did you do it? What do
you want? Where are you?
Again I heard
nothing; least of all an answer.
I don't know how
you did it. Or why, I mouthed, and thought. I don't feel as if I'm under a
spell. But I must be here for a reason. Get on with your business. Tell me what
you want.
Nada.
I walked on,
continuing in a halfhearted fashion my attempts to shift away through Shadow.
As I did, I pondered my situation. I'd a feeling there was something elementary
that I was overlooking in this entire business.
... And a small
red flower behind a rock, next turn.
I made the turn,
and there was the small red flower I had half consciously conjueed. I rushed
toward it to touch it, to confirm that the universe was a benign, essentially
Merlin-loving place.
I stumbled in my
rush, kicking up a cloud of dust. I caught myself, raised myself, looked about.
I must have searched for the next ten or fifteen minutes, but I could not
locate the flower. Finally, I cursed and turned away No one likes to be a butt
of the universe's jokes.
On a sudden
inspiration I sought through all my packets, should I have even a chip of the
blue stones upon my person. Its odd vibrational abilities might just somehow
conduct me through Shadow back toward its source. But no. Not even a speck of
blue dust remained. They all were in my father's tomb, and that was it. It
would have been too easy an out for me, I guess.
What was I
missing?
A fake Dworkin, a
fake Oberon, and a man who'd claimed to be my father all had wanted to conduct
me to some strange place-to compete in some sort of struggle between the
Powers, the Oberon figure had indicated, whatever that meant. The Corwin figure
had apparently succeeded, I reflected as I rubbed my jaw. Only whai sort of
game was it? And what were the Powers?
The Oberon thing
had said something about my choosing between Amber and Chaos. But, then, it had
lied about other things during the same conversation. The devil with both of
them! I didn't ask to get involved in their power game. I had enough problems
of my own. I didn't even care to learn the tales to whatever was going on.
I kicked a small
white stone, watched it roll away. This didn't feel like something of Jurt's or
Julia's doing. It seemed either a new factor or an old one which had
transformed itself considerably. Where had it first seemed to enter the
picture? I guessed it had something to do with the force which had come rushing
after me on our attempt to reach Coral. I could only assume that it had located
me and this was the result. But what might it be? It would first, I supposed,
be necessary that I learn where Coral lay in her circle of fire. Something in
that place, I presumed, was behind my current situation. Where then? She had
asked the Pattern to send her where she ought to go... I had no way now of
asking the Pattern where that might be-and no way at the moment of walking it,
to have it send me after her.
It was time,
therefore, to resign the game and employ different means to solve the problem.
My Trumps having blown a circuit and my ability to traverse Shadow having
encountered a mysterious blockage, I decided it was time to up the power factor
by an order of magnitude in my favor. I would summon the Sign of the Logrus and
continue my shadow walk, backing every step that I took with the power of
Chaos.
Frakir cut into
my wrist. I sought about quickly after any approaching menaces, but I saw
nothing. I remained wary for several minutes longer, exploring the vicinity.
Nothing occurred, though, and Frakir grew still.
It was hardly the
first time her alarm system had been improperly cued-whether by some stray
astral current or some odd thought of my own. But in a place like this, one
could not afford to take chances. The highest stand of stone in the vicinity
stood at about fifteen to twenty meters, perhaps a hundred paces uphill, to my
left. I made my way over to it and commenced climbing.
When I finally
reached its chalky peak, I commanded a view over a great distance in every
direction. I did not behold another living thing in this strange silent
yin-yang universe.
So I decided that
it had indeed been a false alarm, and I climbed back down. I reached once again
to summon the Logrus and Frakir practically behanded me. Hell. I ignored her,
and I sent out my call.
The Sign of the
Logrus rose and rushed toward me. It danced like a butterfly, hit like a truck.
My newsreel world went away, black and white to black.
IV
Recovering.
My head ached,
and there was dirt in my mouth. I was sprawled face down. Memory made its way
home through the traffic, and I opened my eyes. Still black and white and gray
all about. I spit sand, rubbed my eyes, blinked. The Logrus Sign was not
present, and I could not account for my recent experience with it.
I sat up and
hugged my knees. I seemed to be stranded, all of my extramundane means of
travel and communication blocked. I couldn't think of anything to do other than
get up, pick a direction, and start walking.
I shuddered.
Where would that take me? Just through more of the same-more of this monotonous
landscape?
There came a soft
sound, as of a throat being gently cleared.
I was on my feet
in an instant, having inspected every direction on the way up.
Who's there? I
inquired, having given up on articulation.
I seemed to hear
it again, very near at hand.
Then, I've a
message for you, something seemed to say within my head.
What? Where are
you? Message? I tried asking.
Excuse me, came
the muffled voice, but I'm new at this business. To take things in order, I am
where I've always been-on your wrist-and when the Logrus blasted through here,
it enhanced me additionally, so that I could deliver the message.
Frakir?
Yes, My first
enhancement, that day you bore me through the Logrus, involved sensitivity to
danger, mobility, combat reflexes, and a limited sentience. This time the
Logrus added direct mental communication and expanded my awareness to the point
where I could deliver messages.
Why?
It was in a
hurry, could stay in this place for only an instant, and this was the only way
for it to let you know what is going on,
I didn't realize
the Logrus was sentient.
Something like a
chuckle followed.
Then, It is hard
to classify an intelligence of that order, and I suppose it doesn't really have
much to say most of the time, came Frakir's reply. Its energies are mainly
expended in other areas.
Well, why did it
come through here and blitz me?
Unintentional. It
was a by-product of my enhancement, once it saw that I was the only means of
reaching you with more than a few words or images.
Why was its time
here fo limited? I asked.
It is the nature
of this land, which lies between the shadows, that it be mainly inaccessible
both to the Pattern and the Lagrus.
A sort of
demilitarized zone?
No, it is not a
matter of truce. It is simply that it is extremely difficult for either of them
to manifest here at all. This is why the place is pretty much unchanging.
This is a place
they can't reach?
That's about the
size of it.
How come I never
heard of it before?
Probably because
no one else can reach it too readily either.
So what's the
message?
Basically, that
you not try calling upon the Logrus again while you're here. The place
represents such a distorting medium that there's no assurance how any projected
energy might manifest outside some convenient vessel. It could be dangerous for
you.
I massaged my
throbbing temples. At least it got my mind off my sore jaw.
All right, I
agreed. Any hints as to what I'm supposed to be doing here?
Yes, this is a
trial. Of what, I can't say.
Do I have a
choice?
What do you mean?
May I refuse to
participate?
I suppose. But
then I don't know how you get out of here.
So I do get
released from this place at the end, if I play?
If you're still
living, yes. Even if you're not, I'd imagine.
Then I really
have no choice.
There will be a
choice.
When?
Somewhere along
the way. I don't know where.
Why don't you
just repeat all of your instructions to me?
Can't. I don't
know what all is here. It will surface only in response to a question or a
situation.
Will any of this
interfere with your strangling function?
It shouldn't.
That's something,
anyway. Very well. Have you any idea what I'm supposed to do next?
Yes. You should
begin climbing the highest hill to your left.
Which- Okay, I
guess that's the one, I decided, my gaze settling upon a broken fang of blazing
white stone.
And so I walked
toward it, up a gradually steepening slope. The black sun mounted higher into
the grayness. The eerie silence continued.
Uh, do you know
exactly what we will find whenever we get to wherever we're going? I tried to
say in Frakir's direction.
I am certain that
the information is present, came the reply, but I do not believe that it will
be available until we reach the appropriate locale.
I hope you're
right.
Me, too.
The way continued
to steepen. While I had no way to measure the time exactly, it seemed that more
than an hour passed before I left the foothills and was climbing the white
mountain itself. While I observed no footprints nor saw any other sign of life,
I did, on several occasions, encounter long stretches of natural-seeming trail,
shelflike, leading up that high bleached face. Several more hours must have
passed as I negotiated this, the dark sun riding to mid-heaven and beginning
its descent toward a west that lay beyond this peak. It was annoying not to be
able to curse aloud.
How can I be sure
we're on the proper side of the thing? Or heading for the right area? I asked.
You're still
going in the proper direction, Frakir answered.
But you don't
know how much farther it'll be?
Nope. I'll know
when I see it, though.
The sun is going
to slip behind the mountain fairly soon. Will you be able to see it to know it
then?
I believe the sky
actually brightens here when the sun goes away. Negative space is funny that
way, Whatever, something is always bright here and something is always dark.
There'll be the wherewithal for detection.
Any idea what
we're actually doing?
One of those
damned quest-things, I think.
Vision? Or
practical?
It was my
understanding that they all partake of both, though I feel this one is heavily
weighted toward the latter. On the other wrist, anything you encounter between
shadows is likely to partake of the allegorical, the emblematic-all that crap
people bury in the nonconscious parts of their beings.
In other words,
you don't know either:
Not for sure, but
I make my living as a sensitive guesser.
I reached high,
grabbed handholds, drew myself up to another ledge. I followed it for a time,
climbed again. At length the sun went away, and it made no difference in my
ability to see. Darkness and light changed places.
I scaled a five-
or six-meter irregularity and halted when I finally got a look into the
recessed area it rose to. There was an opening in the face of the mountain to
its rear. I hesitated to label it a cave because it appeared artificial. It
looked as if it had been carved in the form of an arch, and it was big enough
to ride through on horse-back.
What do you know,
Frakir commented, twitching once upon my wrist. This is it.
What? I asked.
The first
station, she replied. You stop here and go through a bit of business before
moving on.
That being?
It's easier just
to go and look.
I hauled myself
up over the edge, got to my feet, and walked forward. The big entranceway was
filled with that sourceless light. I hesitated on the threshold, peered within.
It looked to be a
generic chapel. There was a small altar, a pair of candles upon it sporting
flickering coronas of blackness. There were stone benches carved along the
walls. I counted five doorways apart from the one by which I stood: three in
the wall across from me; one in that to the right; another to the left. Two
piles of battle gear lay in the middle of the room. There were no symbols of
whatever religion might be represented.
I entered.
What am I
supposed to do here? I asked.
You are supposed
to sit vigil, guarding your armor overnight.
Aw, come on, I
said, moving forward to inspect the stuff. What's the point?
That's not a part
of the information I've been given.
I picked up a
fancy white breastplate which would have made me look like Sir Galahad. Just my
size, it seemed. I shook my head and lowered the piece. I moved over to the
next pile and picked up a very oddlooking gray gauntlet. I dropped it
immediately and rooted through the rest of the stuff. More of the same.
Contoured to fit me, also. Only
What is the
matter, Merlin?
The white stuff,
I said, looks as if it would fit me right now. The other armor appears to be of
a sort used in the Courts. It looks as if it would fit me just right when I'm
shifted into my Chaos form. So either set would probably do for me, depending
on circumstances. I can use only one outfit at a time, though. Which am I
supposed to guard?
l believe that's
the crux of the matter. I think you're supposed to choose.
Of course! I
snapped my fingers, heard nothing. How slow of me, that I need to have things
explained by my strangling cord!
I dropped to my knees,
swept both sets or armor and weapons together into one nasty-looking heap.
If I have to
guard them, I said, I'll guard both sets. I don't care to take sides.
I've a feeling
something isn' going to like that, Frakir aaswered.
I stepped back
and regarded the pile.
Tell me about
this vigil business again, I said. What all's involved?
You're supposed
to sit up all night and guard it.
Against what?
Against anything
that tries to misappropriate it, I guess. The powers of Order
or Chaos
Yeah, I see what
you mean. Heaped up together that way, anything might come by to grab off a
piece.
I seated myself
on the bench along the rear wall, between two doorways. It was good to rest for
a bit after my long climb. But something in my mind kept grinding away. Then, after
a time, What's in it for me? I asked.
What do you mean?
Say I sit here
all night and watch the stuff. Maybe something even comes along and makes a
pass at it. Say I fight it off. Morning comes, the stuff is still here, I'm
still here, Then what? What have I gained?
Then you get to
don your armor, pick up your weapons, and move on to the next stage of affairs.
I stifled a yawn.
You know, I don't
think I really want any of that stuff; I said then. I don't like armor, and I'm
happy with the sword I've got. I clapped my hand to its hilt. It felt strange,
but then so did I. Why don't we just leave the whole pile where it is and move on
to the next stage now? What is the next stage anyway?
I'm not sure. The
way the Logrus threw infornration at me it just seems to surface at the
appropriate time. I didn't even know about this place till I saw the entrance.
I stretched and
folded my arms. I leaned my back against the wall. I extended my legs and
crossed them at the ankles.
Then we're stuck
here till something happens or you get inspired again?
Right.
Wake me when it's
over, I said, and I closed my eyes.
The wrist twitch
that followed was almost painful.
Hey! You can't do
that! Frakir said. The whole idea is that you sit up all night and watch.
And a very half
assed idea it is, I said. I refuse to play such a stupid game. If anything
wants the stuff,I'll give it a good price on it.
Go ahead and
sleep if you want. But what if something comes along and decides you had better
be taken out of the picture first?
To begin with, I
replied, I don't believe that anything could care about that pile of medieval
junk, let alone lust after it and in closing, it's your job to warn me of
danger.
Aye, aye,
Captain. But this is a weird place. What if it limits my sensitivity some way?
You're really
reaching now, I said. I guess you'll just have to improvise.
I dozed. I
dreamed that I stood within a magic circle and various things tried to get at
me. When they touched the barrier, though, they were transformed into stick
figures, cartoon characters which rapidly faded. Except for Corwin of Amber,
who smiled faintly and shook his head.
Sooner or later
you'll have to step outside, he said.
Then let it be
later, I replied.
And all your
problems will still be there, right where you left them.
I nodded.
But I'll be
rested, I answered.
Then it's a
trade-off. Good luck.
Thanks.
The dream fell
apart into random images then. I seem to remember standing outside the circle a
little later, trying to figure a way to get back in...
I wasn't certain
what woke me. It couldn't have been a noise. But suddenly I was alert and
rising, and the first thing I beheld was a dwarf with a mottled complexion, his
hands clasped at his throat, lying unmoving in a twisted position near the
armor pile.
What's going
on? I tried saying. But there was no reply.
I crossed and
knelt beside the short big-shouldered guy. With my fingertips, I felt after a
carotid pulse but couldn' t locate one. At that moment, however, I felt a
tickling sensation about my wrist, and Frakir-phasing into and out of
visibility-made her way back into touch with with me.
You took that guy
out? I asked.
There came a soft
pulsation then. Suicides don't strangle themselves, she replied.
Why didn't you
alert me?
You needed your
rest, and it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. Our empathy is too strong,
though. Sorry I woke you.
I stretched.
How long was I
asleep?
Several hours,
I'd judge.
I feel kind of
sorry about this, I said. That scrap heap isn't worth somebody's life,
It is now, Frakir
answered.
True. Now that
someone's died for the stuff have you gotten the word as to what we do next?
Things are a
little clearer, but not enough to act on. We must remain until morning for me
to be certain.
Does the
information you have include anything on whether there's food or drink
available in the neighborhood?
Yes. There's
supposed to be a jug of water behind the altar. Also a loaf of bread. But
that's for morning. You're supposed to be fasting throughout the night.
That'f only if I
take this whole business seriously, I said, turning toward the altar.
I took two steps,
and the world started to come apart. The floor of the chapel trembled, and I
heard my first sounds since my arrival; a deep growling, grating noise came
from somewhere far beneath me. A horde of colors flashed through the air of
this colorless place, half blinding me with their intensity Then the colors
fled, and the room divided itself. The whiteness grew intense in the vicinity
of the archway by which I had entered. I had to raise my hand to shield my eyes
against it. Across from this, a profound darkness occurred, masking the three
doorways in that wall.
What .., is it? I
asked.
Something
terrible, Frakir replied, beyond my ability to access.
I clasped the
hilt of the blade I wore and reviewed the spells I still had hanging. Before I
could do any more than that, an awful sense of presence pervaded the place. So
potent did it seem that I did not feel that drawing my blade or reciting a
spell was the most politic action I might take.
Ordinarily I'd
have summoned the Sign of the Logrus by then, but that way was barred to me
also. I tried clearing my throat, but no sound came forth. Then there came a
movement at the heart of the light, a coalescing...
The shape of a
Unicorn, like Blake's Tyger, burning bright, took form, so painful to behold
that I had to look away
I shifted my gaze
to the deep, cool blackness, but there was no rest for my eyes in that place
either. Something stirred within the darkness, and there came another sound-a
grating, as of metal being scraped on stone. This was followed by a powerful
hissing. The ground trembled again. Curved lines flowed forward. Even before
the brightness of the Unicorn etched its lineaments within that mighty gloom, I
realized it was the head of a one-eyed serpent which had come partway into the
chapel. I shifted my gaze to a point between them, catching each within my peripheral
vision. Far better than any attempt to behold either directly I felt their
gazes upon me, the Unicorn of Order and the Serpent of Chaos. It was not a
pleasant feeling, and I retreated until the altar was at my back.
Both came
slightly farther into the chapel. The Unicorn's head was lowered, horn pointed
directly at me. The Serpent's tongue darted in my direction.
Uh, if either of
you want this armor and stuff, I ventured, I certainly have no object-'
The Serpent
hissed and the Unicorn raised a hoof and let it fall, cracking the floor of the
chapel, the fracture line racing toward me like a streak of black lightning and
halting just at my feet.
On the other
hand, I observed, no insult is intended by the offer, Your Eminences-
Wrong thing to say-again,
Frakir interjected, weakly.
Tell me what's
right, I said, trying for a mental sotto voce.
I don't- Oh!
The Unicorn
reared; the Serpent drew itself upward. I dropped to my knees and looked away,
their gazes having somehow become physically painful. I was trembling, and all
of my muscles had begun to ache.
It is suggested,
Frakir recited, that you play the game the way it is set up.
What metal
entered my backbone I know not. But I raised my head and turned it, looking
first to the Serpent, then to the Unicorn. Though my eyes watered and ached as
if I were trying to stare down the sun, I managed the gesture.
You can make me
play, I said, but you cannot make me choose. My will is my own. I will guard
this armor all night, as is required of me. In the morning I will go on without
it because I do not choose to wear it.
Without it you
may die, Frakir stated, as if translating.
I shrugged.
If it is my
choice to make, I choose not to place one of you before the other.
A rush of wind
blew hot and cold past me, seemed a cosmic sigh.
You will choose,
Frakir relayed, whether you become aware of it or not. Everyone does. You are
simply being asked to formalize your choice.
What's so
special about my case? I asked.
Again that wind.
Yours is a dual
heritage, combined with great power.
I never wanted
either of you for an enemy, I stated.
Not good enough,
came the reply.
Then destroy me
now.
The game is
already in progress.
Then let's get
on with it, I answered.
We are not
pleased with your attitude.
Vice versa, I
answered.
The thunderclap
that followed left me unconscious.
The reason I felt
I could afford total honesty was a strong hunch that players for this game
might be hard to come by.
I woke sprawled
across the pile of greaves, cuirasses, gauntlets, helms, and other good things
of a similar nature, all of them possessed of corners or protuberances, most of
which were jabbing into me. I became aware of this only by degrees, for I had
gone numb in lots of important places.
Hi, Merlin.
Frakir, I
responded. Have I been out for long?
I don't know. I
just came around myself.
I didn't know a
piece of rope could be knocked out.
Neither did I. It
never happened to me before.
Let me amend my
question then: Any idea how long we've been out?
Fairly long, I
feel. Get me a glimpse out the doorway, and I may be able to give you a better
idea.
I pushed myself
slowly to my feet, could not remain standing, dropped. I crawled to the
entranceway, noting in passing that nothing on the heap seemed to be missing.
The floor was indeed cracked. There really was a dead dwarf to the rear of the
chamber.
I looked outside,
beheld a bright sky, black points disposed within it.
Well? I asked
after a time.
If I figure
right, it should be morning soon. Always brightest before the dawn, eh?
Something like
that.
My legs burned as
their circulation was restored. I pushed myself upright, stood leaning against
the wall.
Any new
instructions?
Not yet. I've a
feeling they're due with the dawn.
I staggered to
the nearest bench, collapsed upon it.
If anything comes
in now, all I've got to hit it with is an odd assortment of spells. Sleeping on
armor leaves a few kinks. Almost as bad as sleeping in it.
Throw me at the
enemy and the least I can do is buy you time.
Thanks.
How far back does
your memory go?
To when I was a
little kid, I guess. Why?
I recall
sensations from when I was first enhanced, back in the Logrus. But everything
up until we got here is kind of dreamlike. I just sort of used to react to
life.
A lot of people
are that way, too.
Really? I
couldn't think, or communicate this way before.
True.
Do you think it
will last?
What do you mean?
Might this just
be a temporary condition? Might I just have been enhanced to deal with the
special circumstances in this place?
I don't know,
Frakir, I answered, massaging my left calf. I suppose its possible. Are you
getting attached to the state?
Yes. Silly of me,
I guess. How can I care about something I won't miss when it's gone?
Good question,
and I don't know the answer. Maybe you would have achieved this state anyway
eventually.
I don't think so.
But I don't know for certain.
You afraid to
regress?
Yes.
Tell you what.
When we find a way out of here, you stay behind.
I couldn't do
that.
Why not? You've
come in handy on occasion, but I can take care of myself. Now you're sentient
you should have a life of your own.
But I'm a freak.
Aren't we all? I
just want you to know I understand, and it's okay with me.
She pulsed once
and shut up.
I wished I
weren't afraid to drink the water.
I sat there for
perhaps the better part of an hour, going over everything that had happened to
me recently, looking for patterns, clues.
I can sort of
hear you thinking, Frakir said suddenly, and I can offer you something in one
area.
Oh? What might
that be?
The one who
brought you bere
The thing that
looked like my father?
Yes.
What of him?
He was different
from your other two visitors. He was human. They weren't.
You mean it might
actually have been Corwin?
I never met him,
so I can't say. He wasn't one of those constructs, though.
Do you know what
they were?
No. I only know
one peculiar thing about them, and I don't understand it at all.
I leaned Forward
and rubbed my temples. I took several deep breaths. My throat was very dry, and
my muscles ached.
Go ahead. I'm
waiting.
I don't quite
know how to explain it, Frakir said. But back in my presentient days you
inconsiderately wore me about your wrist when you walked the Pattern.
I recall. I had a
scar for a long time after, from your reaction to it.
Things of Chaos
and things of Order do not mix well. But I survived. And the experience is
recorded within me. Now the Dworkin and the Oberon figures that visited you
back at the cave
Yes?
Beneath their
apparent humanity they were pulsing energy fields within geometrical
constructs.
Sounds sort of
like computer animation.
Maybe it is
something like that. I couldn't say.
And my father
wasn't one of these?
Nope. But that
wasn't what I war getting at. I recognized the source.
I was suddenly
alert.
What do you mean?
The swirls-the
geometrical constructs on which the figure were based-they reproduced sections
of the Pattern at Amber.
You must be
mistaken.
No. What I lacked
in sentience I made up in memory. Both figures were three-dimensional twistings
of Pattern segments.
Why would the
Pattern be creating simulacra to bug me?
I'm just a humble
killing aid. Reasoning is not one of my strong points yet.
If the Unicorn
and the Serpent are involved, I suppose the Pattern might be also.
We know that the
Logrus is.
And it seemed to
me that the Pattern demonstrated sentience the day Coral walked it. Say that's
true and add on the ability to manufacture constructs- Is this the place it
wanted them to bring me? Or did Corwin transport me someplace else? And what
does the Pattern want of me? And what does my father want of me?
I envy your
ability to shrug, Frakir answered. Those are what I take it you call rhetorical
questions?
I guess so.
Information of
another sort is beginning to come to me, so I assume the night is ending.
I sprang to my
feet.
Does that mean I
can eat-and drink? I asked.
I believe so.
I moved quickly
then.
While I am new to
these things, I cannot help wondering whether it might be considered
disrespectful to vault over an altar that way, Frakir commented.
The black flames
flickered as I passed between them.
Hell,I don't even
know what it's an altar to, I answered, and I've always thought of disrespect
as something that had to be identity-specific.
The ground
trembled slightly as I seized the jug and took a deep swallow.
Then, again,
perhaps you have a point there, I said, choking.
I carried the jug
and the loaf around the altar, past the stiffening dwarf and over to the bench
which ran along the back wall. Seating myself, I commenced eating and drinking
more slowly.
What comes next?
I asked. You said that the information was flowing again.
You have kept
vigil successfully, she said. Now you must select what you need from among the
armor and weapons you watched, then pass through one of the three doorways in
this wall.
Which one?
One is the door
of Chaos, one the door of Order, and I know not the nature of the third.
Uh, how does one
make an informed decision in these matters?
I think your way
may be barred by all but the one you're supposed to pass.
Then one does not
really have a choice, does one?
I believe that
the matter of the doorways may be predicated upon the choice one makes in the
hardware department.
I finished the
bread, washed it down with the rest of the water. I got to my feet then.
Well, I said,
let's see what they'll do if I don't make a choice. Too bad about the dwarf.
He knew what he
was doing, what chances he was taking.
That's more than
I can say.
I approached the
right-hand door since it was the nearest. It let into a bright corridor which
grew brighter and brighter as it receded until sight of it was lost to me
beyond a few paces' distance. I kept walking. Damn near broke my nose, too. It
was as if I'd encountered a wall of glass. It figures. I couldn' t picture
myself walking off into the light that way.
You're actually
getting more cynical as I watch, Frakir observed. I caught that thought.
Good.
I approached the
middle one more carefully. It wore gray and seemed to let into a long corridor
also. I could see down it perhaps a little farther than the first, though no
features other than walls, roof, and floor presented themselves. I extended my
arm and discovered that my way was not barred.
Seems to be the
one, Frakir observed.
Maybe.
I moved over to
the left-hand doorway, its passage black as the inside of God's pocket. Again
there was no resistance when I explored for hidden barriers.
Hm. It appears I
do have a choice.
Odd. I haven't
any instructions to cover this.
I returned to the
middle one, took a step forward. Hearing a sound behind me, I turned. The dwarf
had sat up. He was holding his sides and laughing. I tried to turn back then,
but now something barred my return. Suddenly then the scene dwindled, as if I
were accelerating to the rear.
I thought the
little guy was dead, I said.
So did I. He gave
every indication.
I turned away,
back to the direction I'd been headed. There was no feeling of acceleration.
Perhaps it was the chapel that was receding while I stood still.
I took a step
forward, then another. Not a sound from my footfalls. I began walking. After a
few paces I put out my hand to touch the left-hand wall. It encountered
nothing. I tried again with the right. Again nothing. I took a step to the
right and reached again. Nope. I still seemed approximately equidistant from
two shadowy walls. Growling, I ignored them and strode forward.
What's the
matter, Merle?
Do you or do you
not sense walls to the right and left of us? I asked.
Nope, Frakir
replied.
Any idea at all
where we are?
We are walking
between shadows.
Where are we
headed?
Don't know yet.
We're following the Way of Cbaos, though.
What? How do you
know that? I thought we had to pick something Chaosian for the pile to be
admitted here.
At this I gave
myself a quick search. I found the dagger tucked into my right boot sheath.
Even in the dim light I could recognize the workmanship as something from back
home.
We were set up
somehow, I said. Now I know why the dwarf wat laughing. He planted this on me
while we were passed out.
But you still had
a choice-between this and the dark corridor.
True.
So why'd you pick
this one?
The light was
better.
V
A half dozen
steps later even the impression of walls had vanished. Ditto the roof, for that
matter. Looking back, I saw no sign of the corridor or its entrance. There was
only a vast dismal area. Fortunately the floor or ground remained firm
underfoot. The only manner in which I could distinguish the way I traveled from
the surrounding gloom had to do with visibility. I walked a pearl-gray trail
through a valley of shadow, though, technically, I supposed, I walked between
shadows. Picky-picky. Someone or something had grudgingly spilled a minimum of
light to mark my way.
I trudged through
the eerie silence, wondering how many shadows I passed among, then wondering
whether that was too linear a way of considering the phenomenon. Probably.
At that moment,
before I could invoke mathematics, I thought I saw something move off to my
right. I halted. A tall ebon pillar had come into view, barely, at the edge of
vision. But it was not moving. I concluded that it was my own movement which
had given it appearance of motion. Thick, still, smooth-I ran my gaze up that
dark shaft until I lost sight of it. There seemed no way of telling how high
the thing stood.
I turned away I
took a few more paces. I noted another pillar then-ahead of me, to the left. I
gave this one only a glance as I continued. Shortly more came into view at
either hand. The darkness into which they ascended held nothing resembling
stars, positive or negative; my world's canopy was a simple, uniform blackness.
A little later, the pillars occurred in odd groupings, some very near at hand,
and their respective sizes no longer seemed uniform.
I halted, reached
toward a stand of them to my left which seemed almost within touching range. It
wasn't though. I took a step in that direction.
There came a
quick squeeze at my wrist.
I wouldn't do
that if I were you, Frakir observed.
Why not? I
inquired.
It might be easy
to get lost and into a lot of trouble.
Maybe you're
right.
I broke into a
jog. Whatever was going on, my only real desire concerning it was to have it
over with as soon as possible, so that I could get back to matters I considered
important-like locating Coral, springing Luke, finding a way to deal with Jurt
and Julia, looking for my father...
The pillars, at
varying distances, slid by, and items which were not pillars began occurring
among them. Some were squat, asymmetrical; others were tall, tapered; some
leaned upon neighbors, bridged them, or lay broken at their bases. It was
something of a relief to see that monotonous regularity destroyed, in a way
that showed that forces played upon forms.
The ground lost
its flatness then, though it retained a stylized geometric quality in the
stacked, step, and shelflike appearance of its various levels. My own way
remained flat and vaguely lighted as I jogged amid the ruins of a thousand
Stonehenges.
I increased my
pace, and soon I was running past galleries, amphitheaters, forestlike stands
of stone. I seemed to glimpse movement within several of these, but again it
could easily have been a function of velocity and poor lighting.
Sense anything
alive in the neighborhood? I asked Frakir.
No, came the
answer.
Thought I saw
something move.
Maybe you did.
Doesn't mean it's there.
Talking for less
than a day, and you've already learned sarcasm.
I hate to say it,
boss, but anything I learn I pick up from your vibes. Ain't no one else around
to teach me manners and like that.
Touchj, I said.
Maybe I'd better warn you if there's trouble.
Touchj, boss.
Hey, I like these combat metaphors.
Moments later I
slowed my pace. Ahead something was flickering off to the right. There were
moments of blue and red within the changing light intensities. I halted. These
glimpses lasted only a few moments but were more than sufficient to make me
wary. I regarded their apparent source for a long while.
Yes, Frakir said
after a time. Caution is in order, But don't ask me what to expect. It a only a
general feeling of menace that I have.
Perhaps there's
some way I could just sneak by whatever it is.
You'd have to
leave the trail to do that, Frakir replied, and since the trail does run
through the circle of stones where it's coming from, I'd say no.
Nobody told me I
couldn't leave the trail. Do you have any instructions to that effect?
I know you are supposed
to follow the trail. I've nothing specific concerning the consequences of
leaving it, though.
Hm.
The way curved to
the right, and I followed it. It ran directly into the massive circle of
stones, and though I' slowed my pace, I did not deviate. I studied it as I drew
near, however, and noted that while the trail entered; there, it did not emerge
again.
You're right,
Frakir observed. Like the den of the dragon.
But we're
supposed to go this way.
Yes.
Then we will.
I'd slows to a
walk by then, and I followed the shining way between two gray plinths.
The lighting was
different within the circle from without. There was more of it, though the
place was still a study in black and white, with a fairyland sparkle to it. For
the first time here I saw something that appeared to be living. There was
something like grass underfoot; it. was silver and seemed to be studded with
dewdrops.
I halted, and
Frakir constricted in a very odd fashion-less a warning, it seemed, than a
statement of interest. Off to my right was an altar-not at all like the one
over which I had vaulted back in the chapel. This one was a rude slab of stone
set atop a couple of boulders. No candles, linens, or other ecclesiastical
niceties kept company with the lady who lay atop it, her wrists and ankles
bound. Because I recalled a similar bothersome situation in which I had once
found myself, my sympathies were all with the lady-white-haired, blackskinned,
and somehow familiar-my animus with the peculiar individual who stood behind
the altar, faced in my direction, blade upraised in his left hand. The right
half of his body was totally black; the left, blindingly white. Immediately
galvanized by the tableau, I moved forward. My Concerto for Cuisinart and
Microwave spell would have minced him and parboiled him in an instant, but it
was useless to me when I could not speak the guide words.
I seemed to feel
his gaze upon me as I raced toward him, though one side of him was too dark and
the other too bright for me to know for certain. And then the knife hand
descended and the blade entered her breast beneath the sternum with an arcing
movement. At that instant she screamed, and the blood spurted and it was red
against all those blacks and whites, and I realized as it covered the man's
hand that had I tried, I might have uttered my spell and saved her.
Then the altar
collapsed, and a gray whirlwind obliterated my view of the entire tableau. The
blood swirled through it to a barber pole-like effect, gradually spreading and
attenuating to turn the funnel rosy, then pink, then faded to silver, then
gone. When I reached the spot, the grasses sparkled, sans altar, sans priest,
sans sacrifice.
I drew up short,
staring.
Are we
dreaming? I asked aloud.
I do not believe
I am capable of dreaming, Frakir replied.
Then tell me
what you saw.
I saw a guy stab
a lady who wus tied up on a stone surface, Then the whole thing collapsed and
blew away. The guy was black and white, the blood was red, the lady was
Deirdre
What? By God,
you're right! It did look like her-in negative. But she's already dead-
I must remind you
that I saw whatever you thought you saw. I don't know what the raw data were,
just the mixing job your nervous system did on them. My own special perceptions
told me that there were not normal people but were beings on the order of the
Dworkin and Oberon figures that visited you back in the cave.
An absolutely
terrifying thought occurred to me just then. The Dworkin and Oberon figures had
had me thinking briefly of three-dimensional computer simulations. And the
Ghostwheel's shadow-scanning ability was based on digitized abstractions of
portions of Pattern I believed to be particularly concerned with this quality.
And Ghost had been wondering-almost wistfully, it now seemed-concerning the
qualifications for godhood.
Could my own
creation be playing games with me? Might Ghost have imprisoned me in a stark
and distant shadow, blocked all my efforts at communication, and set about
playing an elaborate game with me? If he could beat his own creator, for whom he
seemed to feel something of awe, might he not feel he had achieved personal
elevation-to a level beyond my status in his private cosmos? Maybe. If one
keeps encountering computer simulations, cherchez le deus ex machina.
It made me wonder
just how strong Ghost really was. Though his power was, in part, an analogue of
the Pattern, . I was certain it did not match that of the Pattern or the
Logrus. I couldn't see him blocking this place off from either.
On the other
hand, all that would really be necessary would be to block me. I suppose he
could have impersonated the Logrus in our flash encounter on my arrival. But
that would have required Ghost's actually enhancing Frakir, and I didn't
believe he could do it. And what about the Unicorn and the Serpent?
Frakir, I
asked, are you sure it was really the Logrus that enhanced you this time and
programmed you with all the instructions you're carrying?
Yes.
What makes you
certain?
It had the same
feeling as our first encounter back within the Logrus, when I was enhanced
initially.
I see. Next
question: Could the Unicorn and the Serpent we saw back in the chapel have been
the same sort of things as the Oberon or Dworkin figures back at the cave?
No. I'd have
known. They weren't like them at all. They were terrible and powerful and very
much what they seemed.
Good, I said.
I was worried this might be some elaborate charade on the part of the
Ghostwheel.
I see that in
your mind. Though I fail to see why the reality of the Unicorn and the Serpent
defeats the thesis. They could simply have entered the Gbost's construct to
tell you to stop horsing around because they want to see this thing played out.
I hadn't thought
of that.
And maybe the
Ghost was able to locate and penetrate a place that is pretty much inaccessible
to the Pattern and the Logrus.
I suppose you've
a point there. Unfortunately this pretty much puts me back where I started.
No, because this
place is not something Ghost put together. It's always been around. I learned
that much from the Logrus.
I suppose
there's some small comfort in knowing that, but-
I never completed
the thought because a sudden movement called my attention to the opposite
quadrant of the circle. There I beheld an altar I had not noted before, a
female figure standing behind it, a man dappled in shadow and light lying,
fund, upon it. They looked very similar to the first pair..
No! I cried.
Let it end!
But the blade
descended even as I moved in that direction. The ritual was repeated, and the
altar collapsed, and everything again swirled away. When I reached t site,
there was no indication that anything unusual had occurred upon it.
What do you make
of that one? I asked Frakir.
Sarne forces as
before, but somehow reversed.
Why? What's
going on?
It is a gatbering
of powers. The Pattern and the Logrus both attempting to force their way into
this place, for a little while. Sacrifices, such as those you just witnessed,
belp provide the openings they need.
Why do they wish
to manifest here?
Neutral ground.
Their ancient tension is shifting in subtle ways. You are expected in some
fashion to tip the balance of power one way or another.
I haven t the
faintest idea how to go about such thing.
When the time
comes, you will.
I returned to the
trail and walked on.
Did I pass by
just as the sacrifices were due? I said: Or were the sacrifices due because I
was passing by?
They were marked
to occur in your vicinity. You are a nexus.
Then do you think
I can expect-
A figure stepped
out from behind a stone to my left and chuckled softly. My hand went to my
sword, but his hands were empty, and he moved slowly.
Talking to
yourself. Not a good sign, he remarked. ''
The man was a
study in black, white, and gray In fact, from the cast of the darkness upon his
right-hand side and the lay of the light on his left, he might have been the
first wielder of the sacrificial dagger. I'd no real way of telling. Whoever or
whatever he or it was, I'd no desire to become acquainted.
So I shrugged.
The only sign I
care about here has 'exit' written on it, I told him as I brushed past him.
His hand fell
upon my shoulder and turned me back easily in his direction.
Again the
chuckle.
You must be
careful what you wish for in this place, he told me in low and measured tones,
for wishes are sometimes granted here, and if the granter be depraved and read
'quietus' for your 'exit'-why, then, poof! You may cease to be. Up in smoke.
Downward to the earth. Sideways to hell and gone.
I've already
been there, I answered, and lots of points along the way.
What ho! Look!
Your wish has been granted, he remarked, his left eye catching a flash of
light and reflecting it, tapetumlike, in my direction. No matter how I turned
or squinted, however, could I find sight of his right eye. Over there, he
finished, pointing.
I turned my head
in the direction he indicated, and there upon the top stone of a dolmen shone
an exit sign exactly like the one above the emergency door at a theater I used
to frequent near campus.
You're right, I
said.
Will you go
through it?
Will you?
No need, he
replied. I already know what's there.
What? I
inquired.
The other side.
How droll, I
answered.
If one gets
one's wish and spurns it, one might piss off the Powers, he said then.
You have
firsthand knowledge of this?
I heard a
grinding, clicking noise then, and it was several moments before I realized he
was gnashing his teeth. I walked away then toward the exit sign, wanting to
inspect whatever it represented at nearer range.
There were two
standing stones with a flat slab across the top. The gateway thus formed was
large enough to walk through. It was shadowy, though...
You going through
it, boss?
Why not? This
is one of the few times in my life that I feel indispensable to whoever is
running the show.
I wouldn't get
too cocky... Frakir began, but I was already moving.
Three quick paces
were all that it took, and I was looking outward across a circle of stones and
sparkling grass past a black-and-white man toward another dolmen bearing an
exit sign, a shadowy form within it. Halting, I took a step backward and
turned. There was a black-and-white man regarding me, a dolmen to his rear,
dark Form within it. I raised my right hand above my head. So did the shadowy
figure. I turned back in the direction I had initially been headed. The shadowy
figure across from me also had his hand upraised. I stepped on through.
Small world, I
observed, but I'd hate to paint it.
The man laughed.
Now you are
reminded that your every exit is also an entrance, he said.
Seeing you here,
I am reminded even more of a play by Sartre, I responded.
Unkind, he
answered, but philosophically cogent. I have always found that hell is other
people. Only I have done nothing to rouse your distrust, have I?
Were you or were
you not the person I saw sacrifice a woman in this vicinity? I asked.
Even if I were,
what is that to you? You were not involved.
I guess I have
peculiar feelings about little things-like the value of life.
Indignation is
cheap. Even Albert Schweitzer's reverence for life didn't include the tapeworm,
the tsetse fly, the cancer cell.
You know what I
mean. Did you or did you not sacrifice a woman on a stone altar a little while
ago?
Show me the
altar.
I can't. It's
gone.
Show me the
woman.
She is, too.
Then you haven't
much of a case.
This isn't a
court, damn it! If you want to converse, answer my question. If you don't,
let's stop making noises at each other.
I have answered
you.
I shrugged.
All right, I
said. I don't know you, and I'm very happy that way. Good day.
I took a step
away from him, back in the direction of the trail. As I did, he said, Deirdre.
Her name was Deirdre, and I did indeed kill her, and he stepped into the
dolmen from which I had just emerged, and there he disappeared. Immediately I
looked across the way, but he did not exit beneath the exit sign. I did an
about-face and stepped into the dolmen myself. I did emerge from the other
side, across the way, catching sight of myself entering the opposite one as I
did so. I did not see the stranger anywhere along the way.
What do you make
of that? I asked Frakir as I moved back toward the trail.
A spirit of
place, perhaps? A nasty spirit for a nasty place? she ventured. I don't know,
but I think be was one of those damned consructs, too-and they're stronger
here.
I headed down to
the trail, set foot upon it, and commenced following it once again.
Your speech
patterns have altered enormously since your eahancement, I remarked.
Your nervous
system's a good teacher.
Thanks. If that
guy puts in an appearance again and you sense him before I see him, give me the
high sign.
Right. Actually,
this entire place has the feeling of one of those constructs. Every stone here
has a bit of Pattern scribble to it.
When did you
learn this?
Back when we
first tried the exit. I scanned it for danger then.
As we came to the
periphery of the outer circle, I slapped a stone. It felt solid enough.
He's here! Frakir
warned suddenly.
Hey! came a
voice from overhead, and I looked up. The black-and-white stranger was seated
atop the stone, smoking a thin cigar. He held a chalice in his left hand. You
interest me, kid, he went on. What's your name?
Merlin, I
answered. What's yours?
Instead of
replying, he pushed himself outward, fell in slow motion, landed on his feet
beside me. His left eye squinted as he studied me. The shadows flowed like dark
water down his right side. He blew silvery smoke into the air.
You're a live
one, he announced then, with the mark of the Pattern and the mark of Chaos
upon you. You bear the blood of Amber. What is your lineage, Merlin?
The shadows
parted for a moment, and I saw that his right eye was hidden by a patch.
I am the son of
Corwin, I told him, and you aresomehow-the traitor Brand.
You have named
me, he said, but I never betrayed what I believed in.
That being your
own ambition, I said. Your home and your family and the forces of Order never
mattered to you, did they?
He snorted.
I will not argue
with a presumptuous puppy
I've no desire
to argue with you either. For whatever it's worth, your son Rinaldo is probably
my best friend.
I turned away and
began walking. His hand fell upon my shoulder.
Wait! he said.
What is this talk? Rinaldo is but a lad.
Wrong, I
answered. He's around my age.
His hand fell
away, and I turned. He had dropped his cigar, which lay smoking upon the trail,
and he'd transferred the chalice to his shadow-clad hand. He massaged his brow.
That much time
has passed in the mainlines... he remarked.
On a whim, I
withdrew my Trumps, shuffled out Luke's, held it up for him to see.
That's Rinaldo,
I said.
He reached for
it, and for some obscure reason I let him take it. He stared at it for a long
while.
Trump contact
doesn't seem to work from here, I said.
He looked up,
shook his head, and handed the card back to me.
No, it
wouldn't, he stated. How... is he?
You know that he
killed Caine to avenge you?
No, I didn't
know. But I'd expect no less of him.
You're not
exactly Brand, are you?
He threw back his
head and laughed.
I am entirely
Brand, and I am not Brand as you might have known him. Anything more than that
will cost you.
What will it
cost me to learn what you really are? I inquired as I cased my cards.
He raised the
chalice, held it before him with both hands, like a begging bowl.
Some of your
blood, he said.
You've become a
vampire?
No, I'm a
Pattern-ghost, he replied. Bleed for me, and I'll explain.
All right, I
said. It'd better be a good story, though, and I drew my dagger and pricked
my wrist, which I'd extended to a position above his cup.
Like a spilled
oil lamp, the flames came forth. I don't really have fire flowing around inside
me, of course. But the blood of a Chaosite is highly volatile in certain
places, and this, apparently, was such a place.
It spewed forth,
half into and half past the cup, splashing over his hand, his forearm. He
screamed and seemed to collapse in upon himself. I stepped backward as he was
transformed into a vortex-not unlike those following the sacrifices I had
witnessed, only this one of the fiery variety-which rose into the air with a
roar and vanished a moment later, leaving me startled, staring upward and
applying direct pressure to my smoking wrist.
Uh, colorful
exit, Frakir remarked.
Family
specialty, I responded, and speaking of exits...
I stepped past the
stone, departing the circle. The darkness moved in again, intensified.
Reflexively my trail seemed to brighten. I released my wrist, saw that it had
stopped smoking.
I broke into a
jog then, anxious to be away from that place. When I looked back a little
later, I no longer saw the standing stones. There was only a pale, fading
vortex, drawing itself upward, upward, then gone.
I jogged on, and
the trail began, gradually, to slope until I was running downhill with an easy,
loping gait. The trail ran like a bright ribbon downward and off into a great
distance before it faded from view. I was puzzled, however, to see that it
intersected another glowing line not too far below. These lines quickly faded
off to my right and my left.
Any special
instructions pertaining to crossroads? I inquired.
Not yet, Frakir
answered. Presumably, it's a decision point, with no way of knowing what to
base one on till you get there.
It seemed a vast,
shadowy plain that was spread below, with here and there a few isolated dots of
light, some of them constant, others appearing, then fading, all of them
stationary. There were no other lines, however, than my trail and the one which
intersected it. There were no sounds other than my breathing and that of my
footfalls. There were no breezes, no peculiar odors, and the temperature was so
clement that it claimed no notice. Again there were dark shapes at either hand,
but I'd no desire to investigate them. All I wanted was to conclude whatever
business was in progress and get the hell out and be about my own affairs as
soon as possible.
Hazy patches of
light then began occurring at irregular intervals, both sides of the trail,
wavery, sourceless, blotchy, popping into and out of existence. These seemed
like gauzy, dappled curtains hung beside the trail, and I did not pause to
examine them at first, not till the obscure areas grew fewer and fewer, being
replaced by shadings of greater and greater distinction. It was almost as if a
tuning process were in operation, with increasing clarity of outline indicating
familiar objects: chairs; tables; parked cars; store windows. Before long,
faded colors began to occur within these tableaus.
I halted beside
one and stared. It was a red '57 Chevy with some snow on it, parked in a
familiar-looking driveway I advanced and reached toward it.
My left hand and
arm faded as they entered the dim light. I reached to touch the left fin. There
followed a vague sensation of contact and a faint coolness. I swept my hand to
the right then, brushing away some of the snow. When I withdrew my hand, there
was snow upon it. Immediately the prospect faded to black.
I intentionally
used my left hand, I said, with you on the wrist. What was there?
Thanks a lot. It
seemed a red car with snow on it.
It was a
construct of something picked from my mind. That's my Polly Jackson painting,
upscaled to life size.
Then things are
getting worse, Merle. I couldn't tell it was a construct.
Conclusions?
Whatever's doing
it is getting better at it, or stronger. Or both.
Shit, I observed,
and I turned away and jogged on.
Perhaps something
wants to show you that it can baffle you completely now.
Then it's
succeeded, I acknowledged. Hey, Something! I shouted. You hear that? You
win! You've baffled me completely. Can I go home now? If it's something else
you're trying to do, though, you've failed! I'm missing the point completely!
The dazzling
flash which followed cast me down upon the trail and blinded me for several
long moments. I lay there tense and twitching, but no thunderclap followed.
When my vision cleared and my muscles stopped their spasms, I beheld a giant
regal figure posed but a few paces before me: Oberon.
Only it was a
statue, a duplicate of one which occupied the far end of the Main Concourse
back in Amber, or possibly even the real thing, for on closer inspection I
noted what appeared to be bird droppings upon the great man's shoulder.
Real thing or
construct? I said aloud.
Real,I'd say,
Frakir replied.
I rose slowly.
I understand
this to be an answer, I said. I just don't understand what it means.
I reached out to
touch it, and it felt like canvas rather than bronze. In that instant my
perspective somehow shifted, and I felt myself touching a larger than life-size
painting of the Father of His Country. Then its borders began to waver, it
faded, and I saw that it was part of one of those hazy tableaux I had been
passing. Then it rippled and was gone.
I give up, I
said, walking through the space it had occupied but moments before. The
answers are more confusing than the situations that cause the questions.
Since we are
passing between shadows, could this not be a statement that all things are
real-somewhere?
I suppose. But I
already knew that.
And that all
things are real in different ways, at different times, in different places?
Okay, what you
are saying could well be the message. I doubt that something is going to these
extremes, however, just to make philosophical points that may be new to you but
are rather well worn elsewhere. There must be a special reason, one that I
still don't grasp.
Up until now the
scenes I'd passed had been still lifes. Now, however, a number occurred which
contained people; some, other creatures. In these, there was action some of
it violent, some amorous, some simply domestic.
Yes, it seems to
be a progression. It may be leading up to something.
When they leap
out and attack me, I'll know I've arrived.
Who knows? I
gather that art criticism is a complex area.
But the sequences
faded shortly thereafter, and I was left jogging on my bright trail through
darkness once again. Down, down the still gentle slope toward the crossroads.
Where was the Cheshire Cat when rabbit hole logic was what I really needed?
One moment I was
watching the crossroads as I advanced upon it. An eye blink later I was still
watching the crossroads, only now the scene was altered. There was now a
lamppost on the near right-hand corner. A shadowy figure stood beneath it,
smoking.
Frakir, how'd
they pull that one? I asked.
Very quickly, she
replied.
What do the
vibes read?
Attention focused
in your direction. No vicious intent, yet.
I slowed as I
drew near. The trail became pavement, curbs at either hand, sidewalks beyond
them. I stepped out of the street onto the right-hand walk. As I moved along
it, a damp fog blew past me, hung between me and the light. I slowed my pace
even more. Shortly I saw that the pavement had grown damp. My footsteps echoed
as if I walked between buildings. 9y then the fog had grown too dense for me to
discern whether buildings had actually occurred beside me. It felt as if they
had, for there were darker areas here and there within the gloom. A cold wind
began to blow against my back, and droplets of moisture fell upon me at random
intervals. I halted. I turned up the collar of my cloak. From somewhere
entirely out of sight, high overhead, came the faint buzzing sound of an
airplane. I began walking again after it had gone by. Tinily then, and muffled,
from across the street perhaps, came the sound of a piano playing a
half-familiar tune. I drew my cloak about me. The fog swirled and thickened.
Three paces more,
and then it cleared, and she was standing before me, back against the lamppost.
A head shorter than I was, she had on a trench coat and a black beret, her hair
glossy, inky. She dropped her cigarette and slowly ground it out beneath the
toe of a high-heeled black patent-leather shoe. I glimpsed something of her leg
as she did so, and it was perfectly formed. She removed from within her coat
then a flat silver case, the raised outline of a rose upon it, opened it, took
out a cigarette, placed it between her lips, closed the case, and put it away
Then, without looking at me, she asked, Have you a light?
I hadn't any
matches, but I wasn't about to let a little thing like that deter me.
Of course, I
said, extending my hand slowly toward those delicate features. I kept it turned
slightly away from her so that she could not see that it was empty. As I
whispered the guide word which caused the spark to leap from my fingertip to
the tip of the cigarette, she raised her hand and touched my own, as if to
steady it. And she raised her eyes-large, deep blue, long-lashed -and met mine
as she drew upon it. Then she gasped, and the cigarette fell away
Mon Dieu! she
said, and she threw her arms about me, pressed herself against me, and began to
sob. Corwin! she said. You've found me! It has been forever'
I held her
tightly, not wanting to speak, not wanting to break her happiness with
something as cloddish as truth. The hell with truth. I stroked her hair.
After a long
while she pulled away, looked up at me. A moment or so more, and she would
realize that it was only a resemblance and that she was seeing but what she
wanted to see. So, What's a girl like you doing in a place like this? I
asked.
She laughed
softly.
Have you found a
way? she said, and then her eyes narrowed. You're not-
I shook my head.
I hadn't the heart,
I told her.
Who are you?
she asked, taking a half step backward.
My name is
Merlin, and I'm on a crazy quest I don't understand.
Amber, she said
softly, her hands still on my shoulders, and I nodded.
I don't know
you, she said then. I feel that I should, but... I... don't...
Then she came to
me again and rested her head on my chest. I started to say something, to try to
explain, but she placed a finger across my lips.
Not yet, not
now, maybe never, she said. Don't tell me. Please don't tell me more. But you
ought to know whether you're a Pattetn-ghost.
Just what is a
Pattern-ghost? I said.
An artifact
created by the Pattern. It records everyone who walks it. It can call us back
whenever it wants, as we were at one of the times we walked it. It can use us
as it would, send us where it will with a task laid upon us-a geas, if you
like. Destroy us, and it can create us over again.
Does it do this
sort of thing often?
I don't know.
I'm not familiar with its will, let alone its operations with any other than
myself. Then, You're not a ghost! I can tell! she announced suddenly, taking
hold of my hand. But there is something different about you-different from
others of the blood of Amber...,
I suppose, I
answered. I trace my lineage to the Courts of Chaos as well as to Amber.
She raised my
hand to her mouth as if she were about to kiss it. But her lips moved by, to
the place on my wrist where I had cut myself at Brand's request. Then it hit
me: Something about the blood of Amber must hold a special attraction for
Pattern-ghosts.
I tried to draw
my hand away, but the strength of Amber was hers also.
The fires of
Chaos sometimes flow within me, I said. They may do you harm.
She raised her
head slowly and smiled. There was blood on her mouth. I glanced down and saw
that my wrist was wet with it, too.
The blood of
Amber has power over the Pattern, she began, and the fog rolled, churned about
her ankles. No! she cried then, and she bent forward once more.
The vortex rose
to her knees, her calves. I felt her teeth upon my wrist, tearing. I knew of no
spell to fight this thing, so I laid my arm across her shoulder and stroked her
hair. Moments later she dissolved within my embrace, becoming a bloody
whirlwind.
Go right, I
heard her wail as she spun away from me, her cigarette still smoldering upon
the pavement, my blood dripping beside it.
I turned away. I
walked away. Faintly, faintly, through the night and the fog I could still hear
the piano playing some tune from before my time.
VI
I took the road
to the right, and everywhere my blood fell reality melted a little. I heal
fast, though, and I stopped bleeding soon. Even stopped throbbing before too
long.
You got blood all
over me, boss.
Could have been
fire, I observed.
l got singed a
little, too, back at the stones.
Sorry about
that. Figure out what's going on yet?
No new
instructions, if that's what you mean. But I've been thinking, now I know how
to do it, and this place gets more and more fascinating. This whole business of
Pattern ghosts, for instance. If the Pattern can't penetrate here directly, it
can at least employ agents. Wouldn't you think the Logrus might have some way
of doing the same?
I suppose it's
possible.
I get the
impression there's some sort of duel going on between them here, on the
underside of reality, between shadows. What if this place came first? Before
Shadow, even? What if they're been fighting here since the very beginning, in
some strange metaphysical way?
What if they
have?
That could almost
make Shadow an afterthought, a by prod uct of the tension between the poles.
I'm afraid
you've lost me, Frakir.
What if Amber and
the Courts of Chaos were created only to provide agents for this conflict?
And what if this
idea were placed within you by the Logrus during your recent enhancement?
Why?
Another way to
make me think that the conflict is more important than the people. Another
pressure to make me choose a side.
I don't feel
manipulated.
As you pointed
out, you're to new to this thinking business. And that's a pretty damned
abstract line of thought for you to be following this early in the game.
Is it?
Take my word for
it.
What does that
leave us with?
Unwelcome
attention from On High.
Better watch your
language if this is their war zone.
A pox on both
their houses. For some reason I don't understand, they need me for this game.
They'll put up with lt.
From somewhere up
ahead I heard a roll of thunder.
See what I mean?
It's a bluff, I
replied.
Whose?
The Pattern's, I
believe. Its ghosts seem in charge of reality in this sector.
You know, we
could be wrong on all of this. Just shooting in the dark.
I also feel shot
at out of the dark. That's why I refuse to play by anybody else's rules.
Have you got a
plan?
Hang loose. And
if I say 'kill,' do it. Let's get to where we're going.
I began to run
again, leaving the fog, leaving the ghosts to play at being ghosts in their
ghost city. Bright road through dark country, me running, reverse shadow.
shifting, as the land tried to change me. And there ahead a flare and more
thunder, virtual street scene flashing into and out of existence beside me.
And then it was
as if I raced myself, dark figure darting along a bright way-till I realized it
was indeed, somehow, a mirror effect. The movements of the figure to my right
which paralleled my own mimicked mine; fleeting scenes to my left were imaged
to the other's right.
What's going on,
Merle?
Don't know, I
said. But I'm not in the mood for symbolism, allegory, and assorted
metaphorical crap. If it's supposed to mean that life is a race with yourself,
then it sucks-unless they're real platitudinizing Powers that are running this
show. Then I guess it would be in character. What do you think?
I think you might
still be in danger of being struck by lightning,
The lightning did
not follow, but my reflection did. The imaging effect continued for much longer
than any of the previous beside-the-road sequences I'd witnessed. I was about
to dismiss it, to ignore it completely, when my reflection put on a burst of
speed and shot ahead of me,
Uh-oh,
Yeah, I agreed,
stepping up my own pace to close the gap with and match the stride of that dark
other.
We were parallel
for no more than a few meters after I caught up. Then it began to pull ahead
again. I stepped up my pace and caught up once more. Then, on an impulse I
sucked air, bore down, and moved ahead.
My double noted
it after a time, moved faster, began to gain. I pushed harder, held my lead.
What the hell were we racing for anyway?
I looked ahead.
In the distance I could see an area where the trail widened. There appeared to
be a tape stretched across it at that point. Okay. Whatever the significance, I
decided to go for it.
I held my lead
for perhaps a hundred meters before my shadow began to gain on me again. I
leaned into it and was able to hold that shortened distance for a time. Then it
moved again, coming up on me at a pace I suspected might be hard to hold the
rest of the way to the tape. Still, it was not the sort of thing one waited
around to find out. I poured it on. I ran all out.
The son of a
bitch gained on me, kept gaining, caught me, drew ahead, faltered for an
instant. I was back beside it in that instant. But the thing did not flag
again. It held the terrible pace at which we were now moving, and I had no
intention of stopping unless my heart exploded.
We ran on, damn
near side by side. I didn't know whether I had a finishing spurt in me or not.
I couldn't tell whether I was slightly ahead, just abreast, or slightly to the
rear of the other. We pounded our parallel gleaming trails toward the line of
brightness when abruptly the sensation of a glass interface vanished. The two
narrowseeming trails became one wide one. The other's arms and legs were moving
differently from my own.
We drew closer
and closer together as we entered the final stretch-close enough, finally, for
recognition. It was not an image of myself that I was running against, for its
hair streamed back and I saw that its left ear was missing.
I found a final
burst of speed. So did the other. We were awfully close together when we came
to the tape. I think that I hit it first, but I could not be certain.
We went on
through and collapsed, gasping. I rolled quickly, to keep him under
surveillance, but he just lay there, panting. I rested my right hand on the
hilt of my weapon and listened to the sound of my blood in my ears.
When I'd caught
my breath somewhat, I remarked, Didn't know you could run a race like that,
Jurt.
He gave a brief
laugh.
There're a lot
of things you don't know about me, brother.
I'm sure, I
said.
Then he wiped his
brow with the back of his hand, and I noted that the finger he'd lost in the
caves of Kolvir was back in place. Either this was the Jurt of a different time
line or
So how's Julia?
I asked him. Is she going to be alt right?
Julia? he said.
Who's that?
Sorry, I said.
You're the wrong Jurt.
Now what else
does that mean? he asked, propping himself on an elbow and glaring at me with
his good eye.
The real Jurt
was never anywhere near the Pattern of Amber-
I am the real
Jurt!
You've got all
your fingers. He lost one very recently. I was there.
He looked away
suddenly
You must be a
Logrus-ghost, I continued. It must pull the same stunt the Pattern
does-recording those who make it through it.
Is that... what
happened? he asked. I couldn't quite recall... why I was here-except to race
with you.
I'll bet your
most recent memories before this place involve negotiating the Logrus.
He looked back.
He nodded.
You're right.
What does it all mean? he asked.
I'm not sure, I
said. But I've got some ideas about it. This place is a kind of eternal
underside to Shadow. It's damn near off limits for both the Pattern and the
Logrus. But both can apparently penetrate here by means of their
ghosts-artificial constructs from the recordings they made of us back when we
passed through them-
You mean that
all I am is some sort of recording? He looked as if he were about to cry.
Everything seemed so glorious just a little while ago. I'd made it through the
Logrus. All of Shadow lay at my feet. He massaged his temples. Then, You! he
spat. I was somehow brought here because of you-to compete with you, to show
you up in this race.
You did a pretty
good job, too. I didn't know you could run like that.
I started practicing
when I learned you were doing it in college. Wanted to get good enough to take
you on.
You got good, I
acknowledged.
But I wouldn't
be in this damned place if it weren't for you. Or- He gnawed his lip. That's
not exactly right, is it? he asked. I wouldn't be anywhere. I'm just a
recording... Then he stared directly at me. How long do we last? he said.
How long is a Logrus-ghost good for?
I've no idea, I
said, what goes into creating one or how it's maintained. But I've met a
number of Pattern-ghosts, and they gave me the impression that my blood would
somehow sustain them, give them some sort o autonomy, some independence of the
Pattern. Only one of them-Brand-got the fire instead of the blood, and it
dissolved. Deirdre got the blood but was taken away then. I don't know whether
she got enough.
He shook his
head.
I've a feeling-I
don't know where it comes from-that something like that would work for me, too,
and that it's blood for the Pattern, fire for the Logrus.
I don't know how
to tell in what regions my blood is volatile, I said.
It'd flame
here, he answered. Depends on who's is control. I just seem to know it. I
don't know how.
Then why did
Brand show up in Logrus territory? He grinned.
Maybe the
Pattern sought to use a traitor for some sort of subversion. Or maybe Brand was
trying to pull something on his own-like double-crossing the Pattern.
That would be in
character, I agreed, my breath finally slowing.
I whipped the
Chaos blade out of my boot, slashed my left forearm, saw that it spouted fire,
and held it toward him.
Quick! Take it
if you can! I cried. Before the Logrus calls you back!
He seized my arm
and seemed almost to inhale the fire that fountained from me. Looking down, I
saw his feet become transparent, then his legs. The Logrus seemed anxious to
reclaim him, just as the Pattern had Deirdre. I saw the fiery swirls begin
within the haze that had been his legs. Then, suddenly, they flickered out, and
the outline of those limbs became visible once again. He continued to draw my
volatile blood from me, though I could no longer see flames as he was drinking
now as Deirdre had, directly from the wound. His legs began to solidify.
You seem to be
stabilizing, I said. Take more.
Something struck
me in the right kidney, and I jerked away, turning as I fell. A tall dark man
stood beside me, withdrawing his boot from having kicked me. He had on green
trousers and a black shirt, a green bandanna tied about his head.
Now what
perverse carrying-on is this? he asked. And in a sacred spot?
I rolled to my
knees and continued on up to my feet, my right arm bending, its wrist turning
over, coming in to hold the dagger beside my hip. I raised my left arm,
extended it before me. Blood rather than fire now fell from my latest wound.
None of your
damn business, I said, then added his name, having grown certain on the way
up, Caine.
He smiled and
bowed, and his hands crossed and came apart. They'd been empty going in, but
the right one held a dagger coming out. It must have come from a sheath
strapped to his left forearm, inside the billowy sleeve. He had to have
practiced the move a lot, too, to be that fast at it. I tried to remember
things I'd heard about Caine and knives, and then I did and wished I hadn't. He
was supposed to have been a master knife fighter. Shit.
You have the
advantage of me, he stated. You took very familiar, but I do not believe I
know you.
Merlin, I said.
Corwin's son.
He had begun
circling me slowly, but he halted. Excuse me if I find that difficult to
believe.
Believe as you
wish. It is true.
And this other
one-his name is Jurt, isn't it?
He gestured
toward my brother, who had just gotten to his feet.
How do you know
that? I asked.
He halted,
furrowing his brow, narrowing his eyes. I-I'm not certain, he said then.
I am, I told
him. Try to remember where you are and how you got here.
He backed away,
two paces. Then he cried, He's the one! just as I saw it coming and shouted,
Jurt! Watch out!
Jurt turned and
bolted. I threw the dagger-always a bad thing to do, save that I was wearing a
sword with which I'could reach Caine before Caine could reach me now.
Jurt's speed was
still with him, and he was out of range in an instant. The dagger,
surprisingly, struck at the side of Caine's right shoulder point first,
penetrating perhaps an inch or so into muscle. Then, even before he could turn
back toward me, his body erupted in a dozen directions, emitting a series of
vortices which sucked away all semblance of humanity in an instant, producing
high-pitched whistling sounds as they orbited one another, two of them merging
into a larger entity, which quickly absorbed the others then, its sound falling
lower with each such acquisition. Finally there was but the one. For a moment
it swayed toward me, then shot skyward and blew apart. The dagger was blown
back in my direction, landing a pace to my right. When I recovered it, I found
it to be warm, and it hummed faintly for several seconds before I sheathed it
in my boot.
What happened?
Jurt asked, turning back, approaching.
Apparently
Pattern-ghosts react violently to weapons from the Courts, I said.
Good thing you
had it handy. But why did he turn on me like that?
I believe that
the Pattern sent him to stop you from gaining autonomy-or to destroy you if you
already had. I've a feeling it doesn't want agents of the other side gaining
strength and stability in this place.
But I'm no
threat. I'm not on anybody's side but my own. I just want to get the hell out
of here and be about my own business.
Perhaps that of
itself constitutes a threat.
How so? he
asked.
Who knows what
your unusual background may fit you for as an independent agent-in light of
what's going on? You may disturb the balance of the Powers. You may possess or
have access to information which the principals do not wish to see bruited
about the streets. You may be like the gipsy moth. Nobody could see what its
effect on the environment would be when it escaped from the lab. You may-
Enough! He
raised a hand to silence me. I don't care about any of those things. If they
let me go and leave me alone, I'll stay out of their way.
I'm not the one
you have to convince, I told him.
He stared at me
for a moment, then turned, describing a full circle. Darkness was all that I
could see beyond the light of the roadway, but he called out in a large voice
to anything, I suppose, Do you hear me? I don't want to be involved in all
this. I just want to go away. Live and let live, you know? Is that okay with
you?
I reached
forward, caught hold of his wrist, and jerked him toward me. I did this because
I had seen a small, ghostly replica of the Sign of the Logrus begin to take
form in the air above his head. An instant later it fell, flashing like a
lightning stroke, to the accompaniment of a sound like the cracking of a whip,
passing through the space he had been occupying; opening a gap in the trail as
it vanished.
I guess it's not
that easy to resign, he said: He glanced overhead. It could be readying
another of those right now. It could strike again anytime, when I least expect
it.
Just like real
life, I agreed. But I think you may take it as a warning shot and let it go
at that. They have a hard time reaching here. More important, since I was led
to believe that this is my quest, do you know offhand whether you're supposed
to be helping me or hindering me?
Now that you
mention it, he said, I remember suddenly being where I was with a chance to
race you and feeling that we'd fight or something afterward.
What're your
feelings on that now?
We've never
gotten along all that well. But I don't like the idea of being used like this
either.
You willing to
call a truce till I can see my way through this game and out of here?
What's in it for
me? he asked.
I will find a
way out of this damned place, Jurt. Come along and give me a hand-or at least
don't get in the way-and I'll take you with me when I go.
He laughed.
I'm not sure
there is a way out of here, he said, unless the Powers release us.
Then you've
nothing to lose, I told him, and you'll probably even get to see me die
trying.
Do you really
know both kinds of magic-Pattern and Logrus? he asked.
Yeah. But I'm a
lot better at Logrus.
Can you use
either against its source?
That's a very
intriguing metaphysical point, and I don't know the answer, I said, and I'm
not sure I'll find out. It's dangerous to invoke the Powers here. So all I'm
left with is a few hung spells. I don't think it's magic that'll get us out of
here.
What, then?
I'm not certain.
I am sure that I won't see the full picture till I get to the end of this
trail, though.
Well, hell-I
don't know. This doesn't seem the healthiest place for me to spend my time. On
the other hand, what if it's the only place something like me can have an
existence? What if you find me a door and I step through it and melt?
If the
Pattern-ghosts can manifest in Shadow, I'd guess you can, too. Those of Dworkin
and Oberon came to me on the outside before I came to this place.
That's
encouraging. Would you try it if it were you?
You bet your
life, I said.
He snorted.
I get the point.
I'll go a ways with you and see what happens. I'm not promising to help, but I
won't sabotage you.
I held out my
hand, and he shook his head.
Let's not get
carried away, he told me. If my word's no good without a handshake, it's no
good with one, is it?
I guess not.
And I've never
had a great desire to shake hands with you.
Sorry I asked,
I said. Would you mind telling me why, though? I've always wondered.
He shrugged.
Why does there
always have to be a reason? he said.
The alternative
is irrationality, I replied.
Or privacy, he
responded, turning away.
I commenced
walking the trail once more. Shortly Jurt fell into step beside me. We walked
for a long while in silence. One day I may learn when to keep my mouth shut or
to quit when I'm ahead. Same thing.
The trail ran
straight for a time but seemed to vanish not too far ahead. When we neared the
point of vanishment, I saw why: The trail curved behind a low prominence. We
followed this turning and met with another, shortly thereafter. Soon we had
entered upon a regular; series of switchbacks, realizing quickly that they were
mitigating a fairly steep descent. As we proceeded down this turning way, I
suddenly became aware of a brigh squiggle, hanging in the middle distance. Jurt
raised his hand, pointing at it, and began, What..? just as it became
apparent that it was the continuation of our trail, rising. At this, an instant
reorientation occurred, and I realized that we were descending into what seemed
a massive pit. And the air seemed to have grown somewhat cooler.
We continued our
descent, and after a time something cold and moist touched the back of my right
hand. I looked down in time to see a snowflake melting in the twilight glow
which surrounded us. Moments later several more breezed by. A little after that
we became aware of a larger brightness, far below.
I don't know what
it is either, Frakir pulsed into my mind.
Thanks, I thought
strongly back at her, having decided against advising Jurt of her presence.
Down. Down and
around. Back. Back and forth. The temperature continued to decline. Snowflakes
flitted. Arrays of rocks in the wall we now descended took on a bit of glitter.
Oddly, I didn't
realize what it was until the first time I slipped.
Ice! Jurt
announced suddenly, half toppling and catching himself up against the stone.
A distant sighing
sound occurred, and it grew and grew, nearing us. It was not until it arrived,
with a great buffeting gust, that we knew it to be a wind. And cold. It fled
past like the breath of an ice age, and I raised my cloak against it. It
followed us, softer thereafter, yet persistent, as we continued our descent.
By the time we
reached the bottom it was damn cold, and the steps were either fully frosted
over or carved of ice. The wind blew a steady, mournful note, and flakes of
snow or pellets of ice came and went.
Miserable
climate! Jurt growled, teeth chattering.
I didn't think
ghosts were susceptible to the mundane, I said.
Ghost, hell' he
observed. I feel the same as I always did. You'd think whatever sent me fully
dressed to cross your trail might at least have provided for this eventuality.
And this place
isn't that mundane, he added. They want us somewhere, you'd think they might
have provided a shortcut. As it is, we'll be damaged merchandise by the time we
get there.
I don't really
believe that either the Pattern or the Logrus has that much power in this
place, I told him. I'd just as soon they stayed out of our way entirely.
Our trail led
outward across a gleaming plain-so flat and so gleaming that I feared it to
consist entirely of ice. Nor was I incorrect.
Looks slippery,
Jurt said. I'm going to shapeshift my feet, make them broader.
It'll destroy
your boots and leave you with cold feet, I said. Why not just shift some of
your weight downward, lower your center of gravity?
Always got an
answer, he began sullenly. Then, But this time you're right, he finished.
We stood there
for several minutes as he grew shorter, more squat.
Aren't you going
to shift yourself ? he asked.
I'll take my
chances holding my center. I can move faster this way, I said.
You can fall on
your ass that way, too.
We'll see.
We started out.
We held our balance. The winds were stronger away from the wall we had
descended..The surface of our icy trail, however, was not so slick as it had appeared
on distant inspection. There were small' ripples and ridges to it, adequate to
provide some traction. The air burned its way into my lungs; flakes were beaten
into swirling snow devil towers which fled like eccentric tops across out way
It was a bluish glow which emanated from the trail, tinting those flakes which
came within its ambit. We hiked for perhaps a quarter mile before a new series
of ghostly images began. The first appeared to be myself, sprawled across a
heap of armor back at the chapel; the second was Deirdre beneath a lamppost,
looking at her watch.
What? Jurt
asked, as they came and went in a matter of instants.
I didn't know
the first time I saw them, and I still don't know, I answered, though I
thought you might be one of them when we first began our race. They come and
go-at random, it would seem-with no special reason that I can figure.
The next was what
appeared to be a dining room, a bowl of flowers on the table. There were no
people in the room. There and gone
No. Not entirely.
It went away, but the flowers remained, there on the surface of the ice. I
halted, then walked out toward them.
Merle, I don't
know about leaving the trail...
Oh, shit, I
responded, moving toward a slab of ice which reminded me of the Stonehenge-like
area back where I'd come aboard, incongruous flashes of color near its base.
There were a
number of them-roses of many sorts. I stooped and picked one up. Irs color was
almost silver...
What are you
doing here, dear boy? I heard a familiar voice say.
I straightened
immediately, to see that the tall dark figure which had emerged from behind the
block of ice was not addressing me. He was nodding to Jurt, smiling.
A fool's errand,
I'm sure, Jurt replied.
And this must be
the fool, the other responded, plucking that damnable flower. Silver rose of
Amber Lord Corwin's, I believe. Hello, Merlin. Looking for your father?
I removed one of
the spare clasp pins I keep pinned to the inside of my cloak. I used it to
fasten the rose at my left breast. The speaker was Lord Borel, a duke of the
royal House of Swayvill and reputedly one of my mother's lovers of long ago. He
was also deemed to be one of the deadliest swordsmen in the Courts. Killing my
father or Benedict or Eric had been an obsession with him for years.
Unfortunately it had been Corwin whom he'd met, at a time when Dad was in a
hurry-and they'd never crossed blades. Dad had suckered him instead and killed
him in what I supposed was technically a somewhat less than fair fight. Which
is okay. I'd never much liked the guy.
You're dead,
Borel. You know that? I told him. You're just a ghost of the man you were the
day you took the Logrus. Out in the real world there is no Lord Borel anymore.
You want to know why? Because Corwin killed you the day of the Patternfall
War.
You lie, you
little shit! he told me.
Uh, no, Jurt
offered. You're dead all right. Run through, I heard. Didn't know it was
Corwin did it, though.
It was, I said.
He looked away,
and I saw his jaw muscles bunching and relaxing, bunching and relaxing.
And this place
is some sort of afterlife? he asked a little later, still not looking back at
us.
I suppose you
could call it that, I said.
Can we die yet
again here?
I think so, I
told him.
What is that?
His gaze had
suddenly dropped, and I followed it. Something lay upon the ice nearby, and I
took a step toward it.
An arm I
replied. It appears to be a human arm. ''
What's it doing
there? Jurt asked, walking over and kicking it.
It moved in a
fashion which showed us that it was not simply lying there but rather was
extended up out of the ice. In fact, it twitched and continued to flex
spasmodically for several seconds after Jurt kicked it. Then I noted another,
some distance away, and what appeared to be a leg. Farther on, a shoulder, arm attached,
a hand...
Some cannibal's
deep freeze, I suggested.
Jurt chuckled.
Then you're dead,
too, Borel stated.
Nope, I
replied. I'm the real thing. Just passing through, on my way to a far, far
better place.
What of Jurt?
Jurt's an
interesting problem, both physically and theologically, I explained. He's
enjoying a peculiar kind of bilocation.
I'd hardly say
I'm enjoying it, Jurt observed. But considering the alternative, I suppose
I'm glad I'm here.
That's the sort
of positive thinking that's worked so many wonders for the Courts over the
years, I said.
Jurt chuckled
again.
I hea. rd that
metallic sighing sound one does not easily forget. I knew that I could not
possibly draw my blade, turn, and parry in time if Borel wished to run me through
from the rear. On the other hand, he took great pride in observing every
punctilio when it came to killing people. He always played fair because he was
so damned good that he never lost anyway. Might as well go for the reputation,
too. I immediately raised both hands, to irritate him by acting as if he had
just threatened me from the rear.
Stay invisible,
Frakir. When I turn and snap my wrist, let go. Stick to him when you hit, find
your way to the throat. You know what to do when you get there.
Right, boss, she
replied.
Draw your blade
and turn, Merle.
Doesn't sound
too sporting to me, Borel, I replied.
You dare to
accuse me of anything less than propriety? he said.
Hard to tell
when I can't see what you're up to, I answered.
Then draw your
weapon and turn around.
I'm turning, I
said. But I'm not touching the thing.
I turned quickly,
snapping my left wrist, feeling Frakir depart. As I did, my feet went out from
under me. I'd moved too fast on a very smooth patch of ice. Catching myself, I
felt a shadow drift into place before me. When I looked up, I beheld the point
of Borel's blade, about six inches from my right eye.
Rise slowly, he
said, and I did. Draw your weapon now, he ordered.
And if I
refuse? I inquired, trying to buy time.
You will prove
yourself unworthy to be considered. a gentleman, and I will act accordingly.
By attacking me
anyway? I asked.
The rules permit
this, he said.
Shove your
rules, I replied, crossing my right foot behind my left and springing backward
as I drew my blade and let it fall into a guard position.
He was on me in
an instant. I continued my retreat, backing past the big slab of ice from
behind which he had appeared. I had no desire to stand and trade tecniques with
him, especially now that I could see the speed of those attacks. Parrying them
took a lot less effort while I was backing off: My blade did not feel quite
right, however, and as I scanned it quickly I saw why. It was not my weapon.
In the glittering
light from the trail, bounced off the ice, I saw the swirling inlay along part
of the blade: There was only one weapon like this that I knew of, and I had
only just seen it recently, in what might have been my father's hand. It was
Grayswandir that moved before me. I felt myself smile at the irony. This was
the weapon which had slain the real Lord Borel.
You smile at
your own cowardice? he asked. Stand and fight, bastard!
As if in answer
to his suggestion, I felt my rearward movement arrested. I was not run through
when I ventured a quick downward glance, however, for I realized from his
expression that something similar had happened to my attacker.
Our ankles had
been seized by several of those hands which extended up through the ice,
holding us firmly in place. And this made it Borel's turn to smile, for though
he could not lunge, I could no longer retreat. Which meant
His blade flashed
forward, and I parried in quarte, attacked in sixte. He parried and feinted.
Then quarte again, and the next attack. Riposte. Parry sixte- No, that was a
feint. Catch him in four. Feint. Feint again. Hit
Something white
and hard passed over his shoulder and struck my forehead. I fell back, though
the grasping hands kept me from collapsing completely. Good thing I sagged,
actually, or his thrust might have punctured my liver. My reflexes or some
touch of the magic I've heard may dwell in Grayswandir threw my arm forward as
my knees buckled. I felt the blade strike something, though I was not even
looking in that direction, and I heard Borel grunt surprisedly, then utter an
oath. I heard Jurt mouthing an oath of his own about then, too. He was out of
my line of sight.
Then came a
bright flash, even as I flexed my legs, stabilizing, parried a head cut, and
began rising. I saw then that I had succeeded in cutting Borel's forearm, and
fire spurted fountainlike from the wound. His body began to glow, his lower
outline to blur.
It was by no
skill you bested me! he cried.
I shrugged.
It isn't the
Winter Olympics either, I told him.
He changed his
grip on his blade, drew back his arm, and hurled the weapon at me-right before
he dissolved into a tower of sparks and was drawn upward and vanished above.
I parried the
blade, and it passed me to the left, buried itself partway in the ice and stood
vibrating there, like something in a Scandinavian's version of Arthurian
legend. Jurt rushed toward me, kicked at the hands which held my ankles until
they released me, and squinted at my brow.
I felt something
fall upon me.
Sorry, boss. I
hit around his knee, By the time I reached his throat he was already on fire,
Frakir said.
All's well that
ends well, I replied. You weren't singed, were you?
Didn't even feel
the heat.
Sorry I hit you
with that piece of ice, Jurt said. I was aiming at Borel.
I moved away from
the plain of hands, heading toward the trail.
Indirectly it
helped, I said, but I didn't feel like thanking him. How could I know where
he'd really been, aiming? I glanced back once, and several of the hands Jurt
had kicked were giving us the finger.
Why had I been
wearing Grayswandir? Would another weapon have affected a Logrus-ghost as
strongly? Had it really been my father, then, who had brought me here? And had
he felt I might need the extra edge his weapon could provide? I wanted to think
so, to believe that he had been more than a Pattern-ghost. And if he was, I
wondered at his part in the entire affair. What might he know about all this?
And which side might he be on?
The winds died
down as we moved along the trail, and the only arms we saw extended above the
ice bore torches which brightened our way for a great distance-to the foot of
the far escarpment, actually. Nothing untoward occurred as we crossed that
frozen place.
From what you've
told me and what I've seen, Jurt said, I get the impression it's the Pattern
that's sponsoring this trip and the Logrus that's trying to punch your ticket.
Just then the ice
cracked in a numnber of places. Fracture lines rushed toward us from several
directions, both sides. They slowed, however, as they neared our trail, causing
me to notice for the first time that it had risen above the general level of
the plain. We now occupied something of a causeway, and the ice shattered
itself harmlessly along its sides.
Like that, Jurt
observed with a gesture. How'd you get into this mess anyway?
It all started on
April thirtieth, I began.
VII
Some of the arms
seemed to be waving good-bye to us as we commenced our climb after reaching the
wall. Jurt thumbed his nose at them.
Can you blame me
for wanting to escape this place? he asked.
Not in the
least, I replied.
If that
transfusion you gave me really placed me beyond control of the Logrus, then I
might dwell here for some indefinite period of time.
Sounds
possible.
That's why you
must realize I threw the ice at Borel, not you. Besides the fact that you're
smarter than he was and might be able to find a way out of here, he was a
creature of the Logrus, too, and wouldn't have had enough fire if the need
arose.
That had
occurred to me also, I said, withholding a possible out I'd guessed at, to
keep myself indispensable. But what are you getting at?
I'm trying to
say that I'll give you any kind of help you need, just so you don't leave me
behind when you go. I know we never got along before, but I'm willing to put
that aside if you are.
I always was, I
said. You were the one who started all our fights and kept me in trouble.
He smiled.
I never did, and
I won't do it again, he said. Yeah, okay, you're right. I didn't like you,
and maybe I still don't. But I won t mess you up when we need each other this
way.
The way I see
it, you need me a hell of a lot more than I need you.
I can't argue
with that, and I can't make you trust me, he said. Wish I could. We climbed
a little more before he continued, and I fancied the air had already grown a
trifle warmer. Then, But look at it this way, he finally continued, I
resemble your brother Jurt, and I come close to representing something he once
was-close, but not a perfect fit. I began diverging from his model beginning
with our race. My circumstances are uniquely my own, and I've been thinking
steadily since I gained my autonomy. The real Jurt knows things I do not and
has powers I don't possess. But I have his memories up through his taking the
Logrus, and I'm the second greatest authority there is on the way he thinks.
Now, if he's become such a threat as you've indicated, you might find me more
than a little useful when it comes to second-guessing him.
You have a
point, I acknowledged. Unless, of course, the two of you were to throw in
together.
He shook his
head.
He wouldn't
trust me, he said, and I wouldn't trust him. We'd both know better. A matter
of introspection See what I mean?
It means neither
one of you is trustworthy. His brow furrowed; then he nodded.
Yeah, I guess
so, he said.
So why should I
trust you?
Right now
because you've got me by the balls. Later on because I'll be so damn useful.
After several
more minutes ascending, I told him; The thing that bothers me the most about
you is that its was not all that long ago that Jurt took the Logrus. You are
not an older, milder version of my least favorite relative. You are a very
recent model. As for your divergence from the original, I can't see this short
while as making that much difference.
He shrugged.
What can I say
that I haven't said already? he asked. Let's just deal in terms of power and
self interest then.
I smiled. We both
knew that that was the way it was anyway The conversation helped pass the time,
though. A thought came to me as we climbed.
Do you think you
could walk through Shadow? I asked him.
I don't know,
he answered after a time. My last memory from before I came to this place was
of completing the Logrus. I guess the recording was completed at that time,
too. So I have no recollection of Suhuy instructing me in shadow-walking, no
memory of trying it. I'd guess I could do it, wouldn't you think?
I paused to catch
my breath.
It's such an
arcane matter that I don't even feel qualified to speculate on it. I thought
maybe you'd come equipped with ready-made answers for things like that-some
sort of preternatural awareness of your limits and abilities.
Afraid not. Unless
you'd call a hunch preternatural.
I suppose I
would if you were right often enough.
Shit. It's too
soon to tell.
Shit. You're
right.
Soon we'd climbed
above the line of haze from which the flakes seemed to fall. A little farther,
and the winds died to breezes. Farther still, and these subsided to nothing.
The rim was in sight by then, and shortly thereafter we achieved it.
I turned and
looked back down. All I could see was a bit of glitter through the mist. In the
other direction our trail ran on in a zigzag fashion, here and there looking
like a series of Morse dashes-regular interruptions, possibly rock formations.
We followed it to the right until it turned left.
I reserved some
attention for Jurt, looking for signs of recognition at any feature of the
terrain. A talk is only words, and he was still some version of the Jurt I'd
grown up with. And if he became responsible for my falling into any sort of
trap, I was going to pass Grayswandir through his personal space as soon as I
became aware of it.
Flicker...
Formation to the
left, cavelike, as if the hole in the rock opened into another reality. An
oddly shaped car driving up a steep city street...
Wlhat..? Jurt
began.
I still don't
know their significance. A whole mess of sequences like this were with me
earlier, though. In fact, at first I thought you were one of them.
Looks real
enough to walk into.
Maybe it is.
It might be our
way out of here.
Somehow that
just seems a little too easy.
Well, let's give
it a try,
Go ahead, I told
him.
We departed the
trail, advanced upon the reality window, and kept going. In a moment he was on
the side walk next to the street up which the car was passing. He turned and
waved. I saw his mouth working, but no words came to me.
If I could brush snow
off the red Chevy, why couldn't I enter entirely into one of these sequences?
And if I could; do that, mightn't it be possible that I could shadow-walk from
there, wending my way to some more congenial spot, leaving this dark world
behind? I moved forward.
Suddenly I was
there, and the sound had been turned: on for me. I looked about at the
buildings, at the sharply inclined street. I listened to the traffic sounds,
and I sniffed the air. This place could almost be one of San Francisco's
shadows. I hurried to catch up with Jurt, who was moving toward the corner.
I reached him
quickly, fell into step beside him. We came to the corner. We turned. We froze.
There was nothing
there. We faced a wall of blackness. That is, not just darkness but an absolute
emptiness, from which we immediately drew back.
I put my hand
forth slowly. A tingling began as it neared the blackness, then a chill,
followed by a fear. I drew back. Jurt reached for it, did the same. Abruptly he
stopped, picked up the bottom of a broken bottle from the gutter, turned, and
hurled it through a nearby window. Immediately he began running in that
direction.
I followed. I
joined him before the broken pane, stared within.
Again the
blackness. There was nothing at all on the other side of the window.
Kind of spooky,
I remarked.
Uh-huh, Jurt
said. It's as if we're being granted extremely limited access to various
shadows. What do you make of it?
I'm beginning to
wonder whether there isn't something we're supposed to be looking for in one of
these places, I said.
Suddenly the
blackness beyond the window was gone, and a candle flickered on a small table
beyond it. I began to reach through the broken glass toward it. Immediately it
vanished. Again there was only blackness.
I'd take that as
an affirmative response to your question, Jurt said.
I believe you're
right. But we can't be looking for something in every one of these things we
pass.
I think maybe
something's just been trying to get your attention, to get you to realize that
you should be watching what appears, that something probably will be presented
once you begin noticing.
Brightness. A
whole tableful of candles now blazed beyond the window.
Okay, I
hollered. If that's all you want, I'II do it. Is there anything else I should
be looking for here?
The darkness
came. It crept around the corner and moved slowly toward us. The candles
vanished, and it flowed from the window. The buildings across the street
disappeared behind an ebon wall.
I take it the
answer is no, I cried. Then I turned and beat it back along our narrowing
black tunnel toward the trail. Jurt was right behind me.
Good thinking,
I told him when we stood back on the glowing way, watching that rising street
get squeezed out of existence beside us. Do you think it was just pulling
these sequences at random till I finally entered one?
Yes.
Why?
I think it has
more control in those places and could respond to your questions more readily
in one of them.
`It' being the
Pattern?
Probably.
Okay. The next
one it opens to me, I'm going in. I'll do whatever it wants there if it means I
get out of here sooner.
We, brother.
We.
Of course, I
answered.
We commenced
walking again. Nothing new and intriguing appeared beside us, though. The road
zigged and zagged, and we walked along it, and I got to wondering whom we might
meet next. If I were indeed on the Pattern's turf and on the verge of doing
something it wanted, then it seemed that the Logrus might send along someone I
knew to attempt to dissuade me. No one appeared at all, though, and we took the
final turn, followed a trail suddenly grown straight for some time, then saw it
end abruptly within a dark mass far ahead.
Continuing, I saw
that it plunged on into a great, dark, mountainous mass. I felt vaguely claustrophobic;
just considering the implications, and I heard Jurt mutter an obscenity as we
trudged toward it. Before we reached it, there came a flickering to my right.
Turning, I beheld Random and Vialle's bedroom, back in Amber. I was looking
from the southern side of the room, between the sofa and a bedside table, past
a chair, across the rug and the cushions toward the fireplace, the windows
which flanked it admitting a soft daylight. No one was present in the bed or
occupying any other piece of furniture, and the logs on the grate had burned
themselves down to red embers, smoking fitfully.
What now? Jurt
asked.
This is it, I
replied It has to be, don't you see? Once I got the message as to what was
going on, it presented the real thing. I've got to act fast, too, I think-as
soon as I figure just what-
One of the stones
beside the fireplace began to glow redly. It increased in intensity as I
watched. There was no way that those embers could be doing it. Therefore...
I rushed forward
under the influence of a powerful imperative. I heard Jurt shout something
behind me, but his voice was cut off as I entered the room. I caught a whiff of
Vialle's favorite perfume as I passed beside the bed. This was really Amber, I
was certain, not just some shadowy facsimile thereof. I moved quickly to the
right of the fireplace.
Jurt burst into
the room behind me.
Better come out
fighting! he cried.
I whirled to face
him, shouted, Shut up! then raised a finger to my lips.
He crossed to my
side, caught hold of my arm, and whispered hoarsely, Borel's trying to
materialize again! He might be solid and waiting by the time you leave!
From the sitting
room I heard Vialle's voice. Is someone there? she called.
I jerked my arm
free of Jurt's grasp, knelt upon the hearth, and seized hold of the glowing
stone. It appeared to be mortared in place but came loose easily when I drew
upon it.
How'd you know
that one came free? Jurt whispered.
The glow, I
replied.
What glow? he
asked.
I did not answer
him but thrust my right hand into the opened area, hoping offhandedly there
were no booby traps. The opening extended back for a good distance beyond the
length of the stone. And there I felt it, suspended from peg or hook: a length
of chain. I caught hold of it and drew it forth. I heard Jurt catch his breath
beside me.
The last time I
had seen it was when Random had worn it at Caine's funeral. It was the Jewel of
Judgment that I held in my hand. I raised it quickly and slipped the chain over
my head, letting that red stone fall upon my breast, just as the door to the
sitting room was opened.
Placing my finger
to my lips, once more I reached forward, caught hold of Jurt's shoulders, and
turned him back toward the opened wall which let upon our trail. He began to
protest; but I propelled him with a sharp push, and he moved off in that
direction.
Who's there? I
heard Vialle ask, and Jurt glanced back at me, looking puzzled.
I did not feel we
could afford the time for my explaining by sign language or whisper that she
was blind. So I gave him another push. Only this time he stepped to the side,
extended his leg, slipped a hand behind my back, and pushed me forward. A brief
expletive escaped my lips, and then I was falling. From behind me, I heard
Vialle's Who - before her voice was cut off:
I tumbled onto
the trail, managing to draw the dagger from my right boot as I fell. I rolled
and came up with the point extended toward the figure of Borel, which seemed to
have found its form once more.
He was smiling,
his weapon yet undrawn, as he regarded me.
There is no
field of arms here, he stated, to provide you with a lucky accident such as
you enjoyed when last we met.
Too bad, I
said.
If I but gain
that bauble you wear about your neck and deliver it to the place of the Logrus,
I will be granted a normal existence, to replace my living counterpart-he who
was treacherously slain by your father, as you pointed out.
The vision of
Amber's royal apartments had vanished. Jurt stood off the trail, near what had
been its interface with this odd realm. I knew I couldn't beat him, he called
out when he felt my glance, but you took him once.
I shrugged.
At this Borel
turned toward Jurt.
You would betray
the Courts and the Logrus? he asked him.
On the
contrary, Jurt responded. I may be saving them from a serious mistake.
What mistake
might that be?
Tell him,
Merlin. Tell him what you told me while we were climbing out of the deep
freeze, he said.
Borel glanced
back at me.
There's
something funny about this entire setup, I said. I've a feeling it's all a
duel between the Powers the Logrus and the Pattern. Amber and the Courts may
be secondary to the entire affair. You see-
Ridiculous! he
interrupted, drawing his weapon. This is just made-up nonsense to avoid our
duel.
I tossed the
dagger into my left hand and drew Grayswandir with my right.
The hell with
you then! I said. Come and get it!
A hand fell upon
my shoulder. And it kept right on falling with a sort of twist to it, spinning
me into a downward spiral which threw me off to the left of the trail. From the
corner of my eye, I saw that Borel had taken a step backward.
You've a
resemblance to Eric or to Corwin, came a soft, familiar voice, though I know
you not. But you wear the Jewel, which makes your person too important to risk
in a petty squabble.
I came to a stop
and turned my head. It was Benedict whom I beheld-a Benedict with two normal
hands.
My name is
Merlin and I'm Corwin's son, I said; and this is a master duelist from the
Courts of Chaos.
You appear ro be
on a mission, Merlin. Be about it then, Benedict said.
The point of
Borel's blade flicked into a position about ten inches from my throat. You are
going nowhere, he stated, not with that jewel.
There was no
sound as Benedict's blade was drawn and moved to beat Borel's off its line.
As I said; be on
your way, Merlin, Benedict told me.
I got to my feet,
moved quickly out of range, passed them both cautiously.
If you kill
him, Jurt said, he can rematerialize after a period of time.
How
interesting, Benedict remarked, flicking off an attack and retreating slightly
How long a time?
Several hours.
And how much
time will you need to complete whatever you're about?
Jurt looked at me.
I'm not
certain, I answered.
Benedict executed
an odd little parry, followed by a strange shuffling step and a brief slashing
attack. A button flew from Borel's shirt front.
In that case
I'll make this last for a time, Benedict said. Good luck, lad.
He gave me a
quick salute with the weapon, at which moment Borel attacked. Benedict used an
Italianate sixte which threw both their points off to the side, advancing as he
did so. He reached forward quickly then with his left hand and pulled the
other's nose. Then he pushed him away, stepped back a pace, and smiled.
What do you
usually charge for lessons? I overheard him asking as Jurt and I hurried down
the path.
x x x
I wonder how
long it does take for one of the Powers to materialize a ghost, Jurt said as
we jogged toward the mountainous mass the trail entered.
Several hours
for Borel alone, I said, and if the Logrus wants the Jewel as badly as I'd
guess, I'd think it would have summoned an army of ghosts if it could. I'm
certain now that this place is very difficult for both Powers to reach. I get
the feeling they can only manifest via the barest trickles of energy If that
weren't the case, I'd never have gotten this far.
Jurt reached out
as if to touch the Jewel, apparently thought better of it, withdrew his hand.
It seems you've
definitely aligned yourself with the Pattern now, he observed.
Looks as if you
have, too. Unless you're planning on stabbing me in the back at the last
moment, I said.
He chuckled.
Then, Not funny, he said. I've got to be on your side. I can see that the
Logrus just created me as a disposable tool. I'd wind up on the scrap heap when
the job's done. I've a feeling I might have dissipated already had it not been
for the transfusion. So I'm with you, like it or not, and your back is safe.
We ran on along
the now-straight way, its terminus finally grown near. Jurt finally asked,
What is the significance of that pendant? The Logrus seems to want it badly.
lt's called the
Jewel of Judgment, I answered. It is said to be older than the Pattern itself
and to have been instrumental in its creation.
Why do you think
you were led to it and obtained it with such ease?
I have no idea
whatsoever, I said. If you get one before I do, I'll be glad to hear it.
Soon we reached
the place where the trail plunged into the greater darkness. We halted and
regarded it.
No signs
posted, I said, checking above and to either side of that entranceway .
Jurt gave me an
odd look.
You've always
had a weird sense of humor, Merlin he said. Who'd put up a sign in a place
like this?
Someone else with
a weird sense of humor, I replied.
Might as well go
on, he said, turning back toward the entrance.
A bright red exit
sign had appeared above the opening. Jurt stared for a moment, then shook his
head slowly. We entered.
We took our way
down a wandering tunnel-a thing which puzzled me a bit. The artificial quality
of most of the rest of this place had led me to expect a ruler-straight trail
through a smooth-walled shaft, geometrically precise in all its features.
Instead, it seemed as if we were traversing a series of natural
caverns-stalactites, stalagmites, pillars, and pools displayed at either hand.
The Jewel cast a
baleful light over any features I turned to scrutinize.
Do you know how
to use that stone? Jurt asked me.
I thought back
over my father's story
When the time
comes, I believe that I will, I said, raising the Jewel and studying it for a
moment, then letting it fall again. I was less concerned with it than with the
route we were following.
I kept turning my
head as we made our way from damp grotto to high cathedral chamber, along
narrow passages, down stony waterfalls. There was something familiar here,
though I couldn't put my finger on it.
Anything about
this place bring back memories? I asked him.
Not for me,
Jurt replied.
We kept going, at
one point passing a side cave containing three human skeletons. These being, in
their fashion, the first real signs of life I had seen since the onset of this
journey, I remarked on it.
Jurt nodded
slowly.
I am beginning
to wonder whether we are still walking between shadows, he said, or whether
we might actually have departed that place and entered Shadow-perhaps when we
came into these caves.
I could find out
by trying to summon the Logrus, I said, causing Frakir immediately to pulse sharply
upon my wrist. But considering the metaphysical politics of the situation, I'd
rather not.
I was just going
by the colors of all the minerals in the walls, he said. The place we left
behind kind of favored monochrome. Not that I give a shit about the scenery.
What I'm saying is that if we have, it's a kind of victory.
I pointed at the
ground.
So long as that
glowing, trail is there, we're not off the hook.
What if we
simply walked away from it now? he asked, turning to the right and taking a
single step in that direction.
A stalactite
vibrated and crashed to the ground before him. It missed him by about a foot.
He was back beside me in an instant.
Of course, it
would be a real shame not to find out where we're headed, he said.
Quests are that
way. It'd be bad form to miss the fun.
We hiked on.
Nothing allegorical happened around us. Our voices and our footfalls echoed.
Water dripped in some of the danker grots. Minerals flashed. Our way seemed a
gradual descent.
For how long we
walked I could not tell. After a time stony chambers took on a generic
appearance-as if we passed regularly through a teleportation device which
rerouted us back through the same caves and corridors. This had the effect of
blurring my sense of time. Repetitious actions have a lulling effect and
Suddenly our
trail debouched into a larger passage, turned left. Finally, some variation.
Only this way, too, looked familiar. We followed our line of light through the
darkness. After a time we went by a side passage to the left. Jurt glanced up
it and hurried past.
Any damned thing
might be lurking around here, observed.
True, I
acknowledged. But I wouldn't worry about it.
Why not?
I Think I'm
beginning to understand.
Mind telling me
what's going on?
It'd take too
long. Just wait. We'll be finding out pretty soon.
We went by
another side passage. Similar, yet different. 0f course.
I increased my
pace, anxious to learn the truth. Another sideway. I broke into a run...
Another...
Jurt pounded
along beside me, the echoes falling about us. Up ahead. Soon.
Another turning.
And then I
slowed, for the passage continued ahead but our trail didn't. It curved to the
left, vanishing beneath a big metal-bound door. I reached out to my right to
where the hook was supposed to be, located it, removed the key that hung there.
I inserted it, turned it, withdrew it, rehung it.
I don't like thif
place, boss, Frakir noted.
I know.
Seems as if you know
what you're doing, Jurt remarked.
Yep, I said,
then added, Up to a point, as I realized that this door opened outward rather
than inward.
I caught hold of
the large handle to the left and began to pull upon it.
Mind telling me
where we've wound up? he asked.
The big door
creaked, commenced a slow movement as I walked backward.
These are
amazingly like a section of caverns in Kolvir beneath Amber Castle, I replied.
Great, he said.
And what's behind the door?
This is much
like the entrance to the chamber which houses the Pattern in Amber.
Wonderful, he
said. I'll probably go up in a puff of smoke if I set foot inside.
But it is not
quite the same, I continued. We had Suhuy come and look at the Pattern itself
before I walked it. He didn't suffer any ill effects from the proximity.
Our mother
walked the Pattern.
Yes, that's
true.
Frankly, I think
anyone of proper consanguinity in the Courts could walk the Pattern-and vice
versa for my relatives in Amber with the Logrus. Tradition has it we're all
related from back somewhere in the dim and misty.
Okay I'll go in
with you. There's room to move around inside without touching the thing, isn't
there?
Yes. I drew the
door the rest of the way open, braced my shoulder against it, and stared. This
was it. I saw that our glowing trail ended a few inches beyond the threshold.
I drew a deep
breath and muttered some expletive as I let it go.
What is it?
Jurt asked, trying to see past me.
Not what I expected,
I told him.
I moved aside and
let him have a look.
He stared for
several seconds, then said, I don't understand.
I am not certain
that I do either, I said, but I intend to find out.
I entered the
chamber, and he followed me. This was not the Pattern that I knew. Or rather,
it was and wasn't. It conformed to the same general configuration as the
Pattern in Amber, only it was broken. There were several places where the lines
had been erased, destroyed, removed in some fashion-or perhaps never properly
executed in the first place. The ordinarily dark interline areas were bright,
bluewhite, the lines themselves black. It was as if some essence had drained
from the diagram to permeate the field. The lighted area seemd to ripple slowly
as I viewed it.
And beyond all of
this was the big difference: The Pattern in Amber did not contain a circle of
fire at its center, a woman dead, unconscious, or under a spell within it.
And the woman, of
course, had to be Coral. I knew that immediately, though I had to wait for more
than a minute before I got a glimpse of her face beyond the flames.
The big door shut
itself behind us while I stood staring. Jurt stood unmoving for a long time
also before he said, That Jewel is certainly busy at something. You should see
your face in its light right now.
I glanced
downward and observed its ruddy pulsations. Between the blue-white flux in
which the Pattern was grounded and the flickering of that circle of flame had
not noted the sudden activity on the part of the stone.
I moved a step
nearer, feeling a wave of coldness similar to that of an activated Trump. This
had to be one of the Broken Patterns of which Jasra had been
speaking-representative of one of the Ways in which she and Julia were
initiates. This placed me in one of the early shadows, near Amber herself.
Thoughts began to race through my mind at a ferocious pace.
I had only
recently become aware of the possibility that the Pattern might actually be
sentient. Its corollary, that the Logrus was sentient, seemed likely also. The
notion of its sentiency had been presented to me when Coral had succeeded in
negotiating the Pattern and then had asked it to send her where she should go.
It had done so, and this was the place to which she had been transported, and
her condition was obviously the reason I couldn't reach her by means of her
Trump. When I had addressed the Pattern following her disappearance, it
had-almost playfully, it seemed at the time-shifted me from one end of its
chamber to the other, apparently to satisfy me on the matter of its sentience.
And it wasn't
merely sentient, I decided, as I raised the jewel of Judgment and stared into
its depths. It was clever. For the images that I saw within the stone, showing
me what it was that was desired of me, represented something I would not have
been willing to do under other circumstances. Having come away from that
strange realm through which I had been led on this guest, I would have shuffled
out a Trramp and called someone for a fast exit-or even summoned the image of
the Logrus and let the two of them slug it out while I slipped away through
Shadow. But Coral slept in a circle of flame at the heart of the Broken
Pattern... She was the authentic Pattern's hold over me. It had to have
understood something back when she was walking it, laid its plan, and set me up
at that time.
It wanted me to
repair this particular image of itself, to mend this Broken Pattern, by walking
it, bearing the Jewel of Judgment with me. This was how Oberon had repaired the
damage to the original. Of course, the act had been sufficiently traumatic to
kill him...
On the other
hand, the King had been dealing with the real thing, and this was only one of
its images. Also; my father had survived the creation of his own ersatz Pattern
from scratch.
Why me? I
wondered then. Was it because I was the' son of the man who had succeeded in
creating another Pattern? Did it involve the fact that I bore the image ofy the
Logrus within me as well as that of the Pattern? Was it simply because I was
handy and coercible. All of the above? None of them?
How about it? I
called out. Have you got an answer for me?
There was a quick
pang in my stomach and a wave of dizziness as the chamber spun, faded, stood
still, and I regarded Jurt across the expanse of the Pattern, the big door at
his back.
How'd you do
that? he hollered.
I didn't, I
replied.
Oh.
He edged his way
to his right till he came to the wall. Maintaining contact with it, he began
moving about the Pattern's periphery, as if afraid to approach any nearer to it
than he had to or to remove his gaze from it.
From this side I
could see Coral a bit more clearly, within the fiery hedge. Funny It was not as
if there were a large emotional investment here. We were not lovers, not even
terrifically close friends. We had become acquainted only the other day, shared
a long walk about, around, and under the town and palace, had a meal together,
a couple of drinks, a few laughs. If we became better acquainted, perhaps we
would discover that we couldn't stand each other. Still, I had enjoyed her
company, and I realized that I did want to take the time to get to know her
better. And in some ways I felt responsible for her present condition, through
a kind of contributory negligence. In other words, the Pattern had me by the
balls. If I wanted to free her, I had to repair it.
The flames nodded
in my direction.
It's a dirty
trick, I said aloud.
The flames nodded
again.
I continued to
study the Broken Pattern. Almost everything I knew about the phenomenon had
come to me by way of my conversation with Jasra. But I recalled her telling me
that initiates of the Broken Pattern walked it in the areas between the lines,
whereas the image in the Jewel was instructing me to walk the lines, as one
normally would the Pattern itself. Which made sense, as I recalled my father's
story. It should serve to inscribe the proper path across the breaks. I wasn't
looking for any half assed between-the-lines initiation.
Jurt made his way
about the far end of the Pattern, turned, and began to move toward me. When he
came abreast of a break in the outer line, the light flowed from it across the
floor. The look on his face was ghastly as it touched his foot. He screamed and
began to melt.
Stop! I cried.
Or you can find another Pattern repairman! Restore him and leave him alone or
I won't do it! I mean it!
Jurt's collapsing
legs lengthened again. The rush of blue-white incandescence which had fled
upward through his body was withdrawn as the light retreated from him. The
expression of pain left his face.
I know he's a
Logrus-ghost, I said, and he's patterned on my Least favorite relative, but
you leave him alone, you son of a bitch, or I won't walk you! You can keep
Coral and you can stay broken!
The light flowed
back through the imperfection, and things stood as they had moments before.
I want a
promise, I said.
A gigantic sheet of
flame rose from the Broken Pattern to the top of the chamber, then fell again.
I take it that
is an affirmative, I said.
The flames
nodded.
Thanks, I heard
Jurt whisper.
VIII
And so I
commenced my walk. The black line did not have the same feeling to it as the
blazing ones back under Amber. My feet came down as if on dead ground, though
there was a tug and a crackle when I raised them.
Merlin! Jurt
called out. What should I do?
What do you
mean? I shouted back.
How do I get out
of here?
Go out the door
and start shadow-shifting, I said, or follow me through this Pattern and have
it send you wherever you want.
I don't believe
you can shadow-shift this close to Amber, can you?
Maybe we are too
close. So get away physically and then do it.
I kept moving.
There came small crackling sounds whenever I raised my feet now.
I'd get lost in
the caves if I tried that.
Then follow me.
The Pattern will
destroy me.
It's promised
not to.
He laughed
harshly.
And you believe
it?
If it wants this
job done properly, it has no choice.
I came to the
first break in the Pattern. A quick consultation of the Jewel showed me where
the line should lie. With some trepidation I took my first step beyond the
visible marking. Then another. And another. I' wanted to look back when I
finally crossed the gap. Instead, I waited until the natural curving of my
route granted me that view. I saw then that the entire line I had walked thus
far had begun to glow, just like the real thing. The spilled luminescence
seemed to have been absorbed within it, darkening the interstitial ground area.
Jurt had moved to a position near that beginning; He caught my gaze.
I don't know,
Merlin, he said. I just don't know.
The Jurt I knew
wouldn't have had guts enough to try it, I told him.
Neither do I.
As you pointed
out, our mother did it. Odds are you've got the genes. What the hell. If I'm
wrong, it'll be over before you know it.
I took another
step. He gave a mirthless laugh.
Then, What the
hell, he said, and he set his foot upon it.
Hey, I'm still
alive, he called out. What now?
Keep coming, I
said. Follow me. Don't stop. And don't leave the line or all bets are off:
There followed
another turning of the way, and I foilowed it and lost sight of him. As I
continued along, I became aware of a pain in my right ankle-product of all the
hiking and climbing I had done, I supposed. It began increasing with each step.
It was hot and soon grew to be quite terrible. Had I somehow torn a ligament?
Had I
Of course. I
could smell the burning leather now.
I plunged my hand
into the sheath area of my boot and withdrew the Chaos dagger. It was radiating
heat. This proximity to the Pattern was affecting it. I couldn't keep it about
me any longer.
I drew my arm back
and cast the weapon across the Pattern in the direction I was facing, toward
the end of the room where the doorway was situated. Automatically my gaze
followed its passage. There was a small movement in the shadows toward which it
flew. A man was standing there, watching me. The dagger struck the wall and
fell to the floor. He leaned over and picked it up. I heard a chuckle. He made
a sudden movement, and the dagger came arcing back across the Pattern in my
direction.
It landed ahead
and to the right of me. As soon as it made contact with the Pattern, a fountain
of blue flame engulfed it, rising well above the level of my head, splattering,
sizzling. I flinched and I slowed, though I knew it would do me no permanent
harm, and I kept walking. I had reached the long frontal arc where the going
was slow.
Stay on the
line, I yelled to Jurt. Don't worry about things like that.
I understand,
he said. Who's that guy?
Damned if I
know.
I pushed ahead. I
was nearer to the circle of flame now. I wondered what the ty'iga would think
of my present predicament. I made my way around another turn and was able to
see back over a considerable section of my trail. It was glowing evenly, and
Jurt was coming on strongly, moving as I had, the flames rising above his
ankles now. They were almost up to my knees. From the corner of my eye I saw a
movement from that area of the chamber where the stranger stood.
The man moved
forth from his shadowy alcove, slowly carefully, flowing along the far wall. At
least he did not seem interested in walking the Pattern. He moved to a point
almost directly opposite its beginning.
I had no choice
but to continue my course, which took me through curves and turns that removed
him from my sight. I came to another break in the Pattern and felt it knit as I
crossed it. A barely audible music seemed to occur as I did so. The tempo of
the flux within the lighted area seemed to increase also, as it flowed into the
lines, etching a sharp, bright trail behind me. I called an occasional piece of
advice to Jurt, who was several laps back, though his course sometimes brought
him abreast of me and close enough to touch had there been any reason to.
The blue fires
were higher now, reaching up to midthigh, and my hair was rising. I began a
slow series of turns. Above the crackling and the music, I asked, How're you
doing, Frakir? There was no reply.
I turned, kept
moving through an area of high impedance, emerged from it, beholding the fiery
wall of Coral's prison there at the Pattern's center. As I took my way around
it, the opposite side of the Pattern slowly came into view.
The stranger
stood waiting, the collar of his cloak turned high. Within the shadows which
lay upon his face, I could see that his teeth were bared in a grin. I was
startled by the fact that he stood in the midst of the Pattern itself-watching
my advance, apparently waiting for me-until I realized that he had entered by
way of a break in the design which I was headed to repair.
You are going to
have to get out of my way, I called out. I can't stop, and I can't let you
stop me!
He didn't stir,
and I recalled my father's telling me of a fight which had occurred on the
primal Pattern. I slapped the hilt of Grayswandir.
I'm coming
through, I said.
The blue-white
fires came up even higher with my next step, and in their light I saw his face.
It was my own.
No, I said.
Yes, he said.
You are the last
of the Logrus-ghosts to confront me.
Indeed, he
replied.
I took another
step.
Yet, I
observed, if you are a reconstruction of myself from the time I made it
through the Logrus, why should you oppose me here? The self I recall being in
those days wouldn t have taken a job like this.
His grin went
away
I am not you in
that sense, he stated. The only way to make this happen as it must, as I
understand it, was to synthesize my personality in some fashion.
So you're me
with a lobotomy and orders to kill.
Don't say that,
he replied. It makes it sound wrong, and what I'm doing is right. We even have
many of the same memories.
Let me through
and I'll talk to you afterward. I think the Logrus may have screwed itself by
trying this stunt. You don't want to kill yourself, and neither do I. Together
we could win this game, and there's room in Shadow for more than one Merlin.
I'd slowed, but I
had to take another step then. I couldn't afford to lose momentum at this
point.
His lips
tightened to a thin line, and he shook his head.
Sorry, he said.
I was born to live one hour-unless I kill you. If I do, your life will be
given to me.
He drew his
blade.
I know you
better than you think I do, I said, whether you've been restructured or not.
I don t think you'll do it. Furthermore, I might be able to lift that death
sentence. I've learned some things about how it works for you ghosts.
He extended his
blade, which resembled one I'd had years ago, and its point almost reached me.
Sorry, he
repeated.
I drew
Grayswandir for purposes of parrying it. I'd have been a fool not to. I didn't
know what sort of job the Logrus had done on his head. I racked my memories for
fencing techniques I'd studied since I'd become an initiate of the Logrus.
Yes. Benedict's
game with Borel had reminded me. I'd taken some lessons in Italian-style
fencing since then. It gave one wider, more careless-seeming parries,
compensated by greater extension. Gtayswandir went forth, beat his blade to the
outside, and extended. His wrist bent into a French four, but I was already
under it, arm still extended, wrist straight, sliding my right foot forward
along the line as the forte of my blade beat. heavily against the forte of his
from the outside, and I immediately stepped forward with my left foot, driving
the weapon across his body till the guards locked and continuing its drop in
that direction.
And then my left
hand fell upon the inside of his right elbow, in a maneuver a martial artist
friend had taught me back in college-zenponage, I think he called it. I lowered
my hips as I pressed downward. I turned my hips then, counterclockwise. His
balance broke, and he fell toward my left. Only I could not permit that. If he
landed on the Pattern proper, I'd a funny feeling he'd go off like a fireworks
display So I continued the drop for several more inches, shifted my hand to his
shoulder, and pushed him, so that he fell back into the broken area. Then I
heard a scream, and a blazing form passed on my left side.
No! I cried,
reaching for it.
But I was too
late. Jurt had stepped off the line, springing past me, driving his blade into
my double even as his own body swirled and blazed. Fire also poured from my
double's wound. He tried unsuccessfully to rise and fell back.
Don't say that I
never served you, brother, Jurt stated, before he was transformed into a
whirlwind, which rose to the chamber's roof, where it dissipated.
I could not reach
far enough to touch my doppelganger, and moments later I did not wish to, for
he was quickly transformed into a human torch.
His gaze was
directed upward, following Jurt's spectacular passing. He looked at me then and
smiled crookedly.
He was right,
you know, he said, and then he, too, was engulfed.
It took awhile to
overcome my inertia, but after a time I did, continuing my ritual dance about
the fire. The next time around there was no trace of either of their persons,
though their blades remained where they had fallen, crossed, across my path. I
kicked them off the Pattern as I went by The flames were up to my waist by
then.
. Around, back,
over. I glanced into the Jewel periodically, to avoid missteps, and piece by
piece I stitched the Pattern together. The light was drawn into the lines, and
save for the central blaze, it came more and more to resemble the thing we kept
in the basement back home.
The First Veil
brought painful memories of the Courts and of Amber. I stayed aloof, shivering,
and these things passed. The Second Veil mixed memory and desire in San
Francisco. I controlled my breathing and pretended I was only a spectator. The
flames danced about my shoulders, and I thought of a series of half moons as I
traversed arc after arc, curve upon reverse curve. The resistance grew till I
was drenched with sweat as I struggled against it. But I had been this way
before. The Pattern was not just around me but inside me as well.
I moved, and I
reached the point of diminishing returns, of less and less distance gained for
the effort expended. I kept seeing dissolving Jurt and my own dying face amid
flames, and it didn't matter a bit that I knew the memory rush was
Pattern-induced. It stilt bothered me as I drove myself forward.
I swept my gaze
around me once as I neared the Grate Curve, and I saw that this Pattern had now
been full repaired. I had bridged all of the breaks with connecting lines, and
it burned now like a frozen Catherine wheel against a black and starless sky
Another step...
I patted the warm
Jewel that I wore. Its ruddy glow came up to me even more strongly now than it
had earlier. I wondered whether there was an easy way to get it back where it
belonged. Another step...
I raised the
Jewel and stared into it. There was an image of me completing the walking of
the Grand Curve and continuing right on through the wall of flames as if this
represented no problem whatsoever. While I took the vision as a piece of
advice, I was reminded of a David Steinberg routine which Droppa had once
appropriated. I hoped that the Pattern was not into practical jokes.
The flames
enveloped me fully as I commenced the Curve. I continued to slow as my efforts
mounted. Step after painful step I drew nearer to the Final Veil. I could feel
myself being transformed into an expression of pure will, as everything that I
was became focused upon a single end, Another step... It felt as if I were
weighted down with heavy armor. It was the final three steps that pushed one
near despair's edge.
Again ..
Then came the
point where even movement became less important than the effort. It was no
longer the results but the attempt that mattered. My will was the flame; my
body, smoke or shadow...
And again...
Seen through my
risen blue light, the orange flames which surrounded Coral became silver-gray
spikes of incandescence. Within the crackling and the popping I heard something
like music once again-low, adagio, a deep, vibrant thing, like Michael Moore
playing bass. I tried to accept the rhythm, to move with it. Somehow, then, it
seemed that I succeeded-that, or my time sense became distorted-as I moved with
a feeling of something like fluidity through the next steps.
Or maybe the
Pattern felt it owed me a favor and had eased up for a few beats. I'll never
know.
I passed through
the Final Veil, faced the wall of flame, suddenly orange again, and kept going.
I drew my next breath in the heart of fire.
Coral lay there
at the Pattern's center, looking pretty much as she had when last I had seen
her-in a copper shirt and dark green breeches-save that she appeared to be
sleeping, sprawled there upon her heavy brown cloak. I dropped to my right knee
beside her and laid my hand upon her shoulder. She did not stir. I brushed a
strand of her reddish hair off her cheek, stroked that cheek a few times.
Coral? I said.
No response.
I returned my
hand to her shoulder, shook her gently.
Coral?
She drew a deep
breath and sighed it out, but she did not awaken.
I shook her a bit
harder. Wake up, Coral.
I slipped my arm
beneath her shoulders, raised her partway Her eyes did not open. Obviously she
was under some sort of spell. The middle of the Patterb was hardly the place to
summon the Sign of the Logrus if one wished to remain unincinerated. So I tried
the storybook remedy. I leaned forward and kiss her. She made a small, deep
noise, and her eyelids fluttered. But she did not come around. I tried again.
Same result.
Shit! I
remarked. I wanted a little elbowroom for working on a spell like this, a place
where I had access to some of the tools of my trade and could call upon the
source of my powers with impunity.
I raised her higher
and commanded the Pattern to transport us back to my apartment in Amber, where
her ty'iga-possessed sister lay in a trance of her own-one of my brother's
doing, for purposes of protecting me from her.
Take us home, I
said aloud, for emphasis.
Nothing happened.
I employed a
strong visualization then and backed once more with the mental command.
We didn't stir.
I lowered Coral
gently, rose, and looked out across the Pattern through the faintest area of
the flames.
Look, I said,
I just did you a big favor, involving lot of exertion and considerable risk.
Now I want to go the hell out of here and take the lady with me. Will you
please oblige?
The flames died
down, were gone, for several beats. In the diminished light which followed I
became aware that the Jewel was pulsing, like the message light on a hotel
phone. I raised it and stared into it.
I hardly expected
an X-rated short feature, but that's what was playing.
I believe I'm
receiving the wrong channel, I said. If you've got a message, let's have it.
Otherwise, I just want to go home.
Nothing changed,
save that I became aware of a strong resemblance between the two figures in the
Jewel and Coral and myself. They were going at it on a cloak at what appeared
to be the center of a Pattern, flagrante ad infinitum-rather like a spicier
version of the old salt box label, it seemed, if they could be seeing into the
jewel the guy was wearing and watching...
Enough! I
cried. This is fucking ridiculous! You want a Tantric ritual I'll send you some
professionals! The lady isn't even awake-
The Jewel pulsed
again, with such intensity that it hurt my eyes. I let it fall. I knelt then,
scooped Coral up, and stood.
I don't know
whether anyone's ever walked you backwards before, I said, but I don't see
why it shouldn't work.
I took a step in
the direction of the Final Veil. Immediately the wall of flame sprang up before
me. I stumbled in drawing away from it, fell back upon the outspread cloak. I
held Coral to me that she not be cast into the fire. She came down on top of
me. She seemed almost awake...
Her arms went
around my neck, and she sort of nuzzled my cheek. She seemed more drowsy than
comatose now. I held her tightly and thought about it.
Coral? I tried
again.
Mm, she said.
Seems the only
way we can get out of here is by making love.
Thought you'd
never ask, she mumbled, eyes still closed.
That made it seem
somewhat less like necrophilia, I told myself as I turned us onto our sides so
I could get at those coppery buttons. She muttered a little more while I was
about things, but it didn't exactly turn into a conversation. Still, her body
was not unresponsive to my attentions, and the encounter quickly took on all
the usual features, too commonplace to be of much concern to the sophisticated.
It seemed an interesting way to break a spell. Maybe the Pattern did have a
sense of humor. I don't know.
The fires died
down at about the same time that the fires died down, so to speak. Cora!'s eyes
finally opened.
That seems to
have taken care of the circle of flames I said.
When did this
cease being a dream? she asked.
Good question,
I replied, and only you can answer it.
Did you just
rescue me from something?
That seems the
easiest way to put it, I answered as she drew away somewhat and cast her gaze
about the chamber. See where it got you when you asked the Pattern to send you
where you should go? I said.
Screwed, she
replied.
Precisely.
We drew apart. We
adjusted our apparel.
It's a good way
to get to know each other better... I had begun when the cavern was shaken by
a powerful earth tremor.
The timing is
really off here, I observed as we were rocked together and clung to each other
for comfort, if not support.
It was over in an
instant, and the Patrern was suddenly blazing more brilliantly than I'd ever
seen it before. I shook my head. I rubbed my eyes. Something was wrong, even
though it felt very right. Then the great metal-bound door opened-inward! -and
I realized that we had come back to Amber, the real timber. My glowing trail
still led up to the threshold, though it was fading fast, and a small figure
stood upon it. Before I could even squint against the corridor's gloom, I felt
a familiar disorientation, and we were in my bedroom.
Nayda! Coral
exclaimed when she viewed the figure reclined upon my bed.
Not exactly, I
said. I mean, it's her body. But the spirit that moves it is of a different
order.
I don't
understand.
I was busy
thinking of the person who had been about to invade the precincts of the
Pattern. I was also a mass of aching muscles, screaming nerves, and assorted
fatigue poisons. I crossed to the table where the wine bottle I'd opened for
Jasra-how long ago? -still stood. I found us two clean glasses. I filled them.
I passed one to Coral.
Your sister was
very ill awhile back, wasn't she?
Yes, she
replied.
I took a big
swallow.
She was near
death. At that time her body was possessed by a ty'iga spirit-a kind of
demon-as Nayda no longer had any use for it.
What do you mean
by that?
I understand
that she actually died.
Coral stared into
my eyes. She didn't find whatever she sought, and she took a drink instead.
I'd known
something was wrong, she said. She hasn't really been herself since the
illness.
She became
nasty? Sneaky?
No, a lot nicer.
Nayda was always a bitch.
You didn't get
along?
Not till
recently. She's not in any pain, is she?
No, she's just
sleeping. She's under a spell.
Why don't you
release her? She doesn't look like much of a danger.
I don't think
she is now. Just the opposite, in fact, I said. And we will release her,
soon. My brother Mandor will have to undo it, though. It's his spell.
Mandor? I don't
really know much about you-or your family-do I?
Nope,,I said,
and vice versa. Listen, I don't even know what day it is. I crossed the room
and peered out the window. There was daylight. It was cloudy though, and I
couldn't guess the time. There's something you should do right away Go see
your father and let him know you're all right. Tell him you got lost in the
caverns or took a wrong turn into the Corridor Mirrors and wound up on some
other plane of existece or something. Anything. To avoid a diplomatic incident.
Okay?
She finished her
drink and nodded. Then she looked at me and blushed and looked away.
We'll get
together again before I leave, won't we?
I reached out and
patted her shoulder, not really knowing what my feelings were. Then I realized
that wouldn't do, and I stepped forward and embraced her.
You know it, I
said as I stroked her hair.
Thanks for
showing me around town.
We'll have to do
it again, I told her, as soon as the pace slackens.
Uh-huh.
We walked to the
door.
I want to see
you soon, she said.
I'm fading
fast, I told her, as I opened it. I've ba through hell and back.
She touched my
cheek.
Poor Merlin,
she said. Sleep tight.
I gulped the rest
of my wine and withdrew my Trumps. I wanted to do just what she said, but
certain unavoidables came first. I riffled my way to the Ghostwheel's card,
removed it, and regarded it.
Almost
immediately, following the faintest drop in temperature and the barest
formation of desire on my part, Ghostwheel appeared before me-a red circle
turning in the middle of the air.
Uh, hello, Dad,
it stated. I was wondering where you'd gotten to. When I checked back at the
cave, you were gone, and none of my shadow-indexing procedures could turn you
up. It never even occurred to me that you might simply have come home. I-
Lacer, I said.
I'm in a hurry. Get me down to the chamber of the Pattern fast.
There's
something I'd better tell you first.
What?
That force that
followed you to the Keep-the one I hid you from in the cave..?
Yes.
It was the
Pattern itself that was seeking you.
I guessed that,
I said, later. We've had our encounter and sort of come to terms for now. Get
me down there right away. It's important.
Sir, I am afraid
of that thing.
Then take me as
close as you dare and step aside. I have to check something out.
Very well. Come
this way.
I took a step
forward. Ghost rose into the air, rotated ninety degrees toward me, and dropped
quickly, passing my head, shoulders, torso and vanishing beneath my feet. The
lights went out as he did so, and I called up my Logrus vision immediately. It
showed me that I stood in the passageway outside the big door to the chamber of
the Pattern.
Ghost? I said
softly.
There was no
reply.
I moved forward,
turned the comer, advanced to the door, and leaned upon it. It was still
unlocked, and it yielded to my pushing. Frakir pulsed once upon my wrist.
Frakir? I
inquired.
There came no
answer from that quarter either.
Lose your voice,
lady?
She pulsed twice.
I stroked her.
As the door
opened before me, I was certain that the Pattern had grown brighter. The
observation was quickly pushed aside, however. A dark-haired woman stood at the
Pattern's center, her back to me, her arms upraised. I almost shouted the name
I thought she might answer to, but she was gone before my vocal mechanism
responded. I slumped against the wall.
I really feel
used, I said aloud. You've run my ass ragged, you placed my life in jeopardy
more than once, you got me to perform to satisfy your metaphysical voyeurism,
then you kicked me out after you got the last thing you wanted-a slightly
brighter glow. I guess that gods or powers or whatever the hell you are don't
have to say `Thank you' or `I'm sorry' or 'Go to hell' when they've finished
using someone. And obviously you feel no need to justify yourself to me. Well,
I'm not a baby carriage. I resent being pushed around by you and the Logrus in
whatever game you're playing. How'd you like it if I opened a vein and bled all
over you?
Immediately there
was a great coalescence of energy at my side of the Pattern. With a heavy
whooshing sound a tower of blue flame built itself before me, widened, assumed
genderless features of an enormous inhuman beauty. I had to shade my eyes
against it.
You do not
understand, came a voice modulated of the roaring of flames.
I know. That's
why I'm here.
Your efforts are
not unappreciated.
Glad to hear
it.
There was no
other way to conduct matters.
Well, were they
conducted to your satisfaction?
They were.
Then you are
welcome, I guess.
You are
insolent, Merlin.
The way I feel
right now I've nothing to lose. I'm just too damned tired to care what you do
to me. So I came down here to tell you that I think you owe me a big one.
That's all.
I turned my back
on it then.
Not even Oberon
dared address me so, it said.
I shrugged and
took a step toward the door. When I set my foot down, I was back in my
apartment.
I shrugged again,
then went and splashed water in my face.
You still okay,
Dad?
There was a ring
around the bowl. It rose into the air and followed me about the room.
I'm all right,
I acknowledged. How about yourself ?
Fine. It ignored
me completely.
Do you know what
it's up to? I asked.
It seems to be
dueling with the Logrus for control of Shadow. And it just won a round.
Whatever happened seems to have strengthened it. You were involved, right?
Right.
Where were you
after you left the cave I'd put you in?
You know of a
land that lies between the shadows?
Between? No.
That doesn't make sense.
Well, that's
where I was.
How'd you get
there?
I don't know.
With considerable difflculty, I'd guess. Are Mandor and Jasra atl right?
The last time I
looked they were.
How about Luke?
I'd no reason to
seek him out. Do you want me to?
Not just now.
Right now I want you to go upstairs and look in on the royal suite. I want to
know whether it is, at the moment, occupied. And if so, by whom. I also want
you to check the fireplace in the bedroom. See whether loose stone which was
removed from an area to the right of it has been replaced or is still lying
upon the hearth.
He vanished, and
I paced. I was afraid to sit down or to lie down. I'd a feeling that I'd go to
sleep instantly if I did and that I'd be difficult to awaken. But Ghost spun
back into existence before I chalked up much mileage.
The Queen,
Vialle, is present, he said, in her studio, the loose stone has been
replaced, and there is a dwarf in the hall knocking on doors.
Damn, I said.
Then they know it's missing. A dwarf ?
A dwarf.
I sighed.
I guess I'd
better walk on upstairs, return the Jewel, and try to explain what happened. If
Vialle likes my story, she might just forget to mention it to Random.
I'll transfer you
up there.
No, that would
not be too politic. Or polite either. I'd better go knock on the door and get
admitted properly this time.
How do people
know when to knock and when to go on in?
In general, if
it's closed, you knock on it.
As the dwarf is
doing?
I heard a faint
knocking from somewhere outside.
He's just going
along, indiscriminately banging on doors? I asked.
Well, he's
trying them in sequence, so I don't know that you could say it's
indiscriminate. So far all of the doors he's tried have been to rooms which are
empty. He should reach yours in another minute or so.
I crossed to my
door, unlocked it, opened it, and stepped out into the hallway.
Sure enough,
there was a short guy moving along the hallway. He looked in my direction at the
opening of my door, and his teeth showed within his beard as he smiled and
headed toward me.
It quickly became
apparent that he was a hunchback.
My God! I said.
You're Dworkin, aren t you? The real Dworkin!
I believe so,
he replied in a not unpleasant voice. And I do hope that you are Corwin's son,
Merlin.
I am, I said.
This is an unusual pleasure, coming at an unusual time.
It is not a
social call, he stated, drawing near and clasping my hand and shoulder. Ah!
These are your quarters!
Yes. Won't you
come in?
Thank you.
I led him in.
Ghost did a fly-on-the-wall imitation, became about a half inch in diameter,
and took up residence on the armoire as if the result of a stray sunbeam.
Dworkin did a quick turn about the sitting room, glanced into the bedroom,
stared at Nayda for a time;. muttered, Always let sleeping demons lie,
touched the Jewel as he passed me on his return, shook his head forebodingly,
and sank into the chair I'd been afraid I'd go to sleep in.
Would you care
for a glass of wine? I asked him. He shook his head.
No, thank you,
he replied. It was you who repaired the nearest Broken Pattern in Shadow, was
it not?
Yes, it was.
Why did you do
it?
I didn't have
much choice in the matter.
You had better
tell me all about it, the old man said,. tugging at his grisly, irregular
beard. His hair was long and could have used a trim also. Still, there seemed
nothing of madness in his gaze or his words.
It is not a
simple story, and if I am to stay awake long enough to tell it, I am going to
need some coffee, I said.
He spread his
hands, and a small, white-clothed table appeared between us, bearing service
for two and a steaming silvery carafe set above a squat candle. There was also
a tray of biscuits. I couldn't have summoned it all that fast. I wondered
whether Mandor could.
In that case, I
will join you, Dworkin said.
I sighed and
poured. I raised the Jewel of Judgment.
Perhaps I'd
better return this thing before I start, I told him. It may save me a lot of
trouble. later.
He shook his head
as I began to rise.
I think not, he
stated. If you take is off now, you will probably die.
I sat down again.
Cream and
sugar? I asked him.
IX
I came around
slowly. That familiar blueness was a lake of prebeing in which I drifted. Oh,
yes, I was here because... I was here, as the song said. I turned over onto my
other side within my sleeping bag, drew my knees up to my chest, and went back
to sleep.
The next time I
came around and gave it a quick glance the world was still a blue place. Fine:
There is much to be said for the tried, the true. Then I recalled that Luke
might be by at any time to kill me, and my lingers wrapped themselves around
the hilt of the weapon beside me, and I strained my hearing after signs of
anything's approach.
Would I spend the
day chipping at the wall of my crystal cave? I wondered. Or would Jasra come
and try again to kill me?
Again? Something
was wrong. There'd bees an awful lot of business involving Jurt and Coral and
Luke and Mandor, and even Julia. Had it all been a dream?
The moment of
panic came and went, and then my wandering spirit returned, bringing along the
rest of my memories, and I yawned and everything was all right again.
I stretched. I
sat up. I knuckled my eyes.
Yes, I was back
in the crystal cave. No, everything that had happened since Luke imprisoned me
had not been a dream. I had returned here by choice (a) because a good night's
sleep in this time line amounted to only a brief span back in Amber, (b)
because nobody could bother me here with a Trump contact, and (c) because it
was possible that even the Pattern and the Logrus couldn't track me down here.
I brushed my hair
out of my eyes, rose, and headed back to the john. It had been a good idea, having
Ghost` transport me here following my colloquy with Dworkin. I was certain I
had slept for something like twelve hours -deep, undisturbed stuff, the best
kind. I drained a quart water bottle. I washed my face with more of the stuff.
Later, after I
had dressed and stowed the bedclothes in the storeroom, I walked to the
entrance chamber and stood in the light beneath the overhead adit. What I could
see of the sky through it was clear. I could still hear Luke's words the day he
had imprisoned me here and I'd learned we were related.
I drew the Jewel
of Judgment up from within my shirt, removed it, held it high so that the light
shone from behind it, stared into its depths. No messages this time.
Just as well. I
wasn't in the mood for two-way traffic. I lowered myself into a comfortable
cross-legged position, still regarding the stone. Time to do it and be done
with it, now that I felt rested and somewhat alert. As Dworkin had suggested, I
sought the Pattern within that red pool.
After a time it
began to take shape. It did not appear as I had been visualizing it, but this
was not an exercise in visualization. I watched the structure come clear. It
was not as if it were suddenly coming into existence, however, but rather as if
it had been there all along and my eyes were just now adjusting to perceive it
properly. Likely this was actually the case, too.
I took a deep
breath and released it. I repeated the process. Then I began a careful survey
of the design: I couldn't recall everything my father had said about attuning
oneself to the Jewel. When I had mentioned this to Dworkin, he had told me not
to worry about it, that I needed but to locate the three-dimensional edition of
the Pattern within the stone, find its point of entry, and traverse it. When I
pressed him for details, he had simply chuckled and told me not to worry.
All right.
Slowly I turned
it, drawing it nearer. A small break appeared, high, to the right. As I focused
upon it, it seemed to rush toward me.
I went to that
place, and I went in there. It was a strange roller coaster of an experience,
moving along Pattern-like lines within the gemstone. I went where it drew me,
sometimes with a near-eviscerating feeling of vertigo, other times pushing with
my will against the ruby barriers till they yielded and I climbed, fell, slid,
or pushed my way onward. I lost most of the awareness of my body, hand holding
the chain high, save that I knew I was sweating profusely, as it stung my eyes
with some regularity.
I've no idea how
much time passed in my attunement to the Jewel of Judgment, the higher octave
of the Pattern. Dworkin felt that there were reasons other than my having
pissed off the Pattern for its wanting me dead immediately following my
completion of my bizarre quest and repairing of the nearest of the Broken
Patterns. But Dworkin refused to elaborate, feeling that my knowing the reason
could influence a possible future choice which should be made freely. All of
which sounded like gibberish to me, save that everything else he said struck me
as eminently sane, in contrast with the Dworkin I knew of from legend and
hearsay.
My mind plunged
and reared through the pool of blood that was the Jewel's interior. The Pattern
segments I had traversed and those I had yet to travel moved about me, flashing
like lightning. I'd a feeling my mind was going to crash against some invisible
Veil and shater. My movement was out of control now, accelerating. There was no
way, I knew, for me to withdraw from this thing until I had run its course.
Dworkin felt that
I had been protected from the Pattern during our confrontation, when I had gone
back to check on the figure I had seen, because I was wearing the Jewel. I
could not keep wearing it for too long, though, because this also had a
tendency to prove fatal. He decided that I must become attuned to the Jewel-as
were my father and Random-before I let it out of my possession. I would
thereafter bear the higher-order image within me, which should function as well
as the Jewel in defending me against the Pattern. I could hardly argue with the
man who had supposedly created the Pattern, using the Jewel. So I agreed with
him. Only I was too tired to do what he suggested. That was why I had had Ghost
return me to my crystal cave, my sanctuary, to rest first.
Now, now... I
flowed. I spun. Occasionally I stalled. The Jewel's equivalents of the Veils
were no less formidable because I had left my body behind. Each such passage
left me as wrung out as running a mile in Olympic time. Though I knew at one
level that I stood holding the Jewel through which I took my initiatory way, at
another I could feel my heart pounding, and at another I recalled parts of a
guest lecture by Joan Halifax for an anthropology course I was taking, years
before. The medium swirled like Geyser Peak Merlot 1985 in a goblet-and whom
was I looking across the table at that night? No matter. Onward, down and
around. The blood-brightened tide was loosed. A message was being inscribed
upon my spirit. In the beginning was a word I cannot spell... Brighter,
brighter. Faster, faster. Collision with a ruby wall, I a smear upon it. Come
now, Schopenhauer, to the final game of will. An age or two came and went;
then, suddenly, the way was opened. I was spilled forth into the light of an
exploding star. Red, red, red, shifting me onward, away, like my little boat
Starburst, driven, expanding, coming home...
I collapsed.
Though I did not lose consciousness, my state of mind was not normal either.
There was a hypnagogia I could have passed through at any time I chose, in
either direction. But why? I am seldom the recipient of such a delivery of
euphoria. I felt I'd earned it, so I drifted, right there, for a long, long
time.
When it finally
subsided below the level that made indulgence worthwhile, I climbed to my feet,
swayed, leaned against the wall, made my way to the storeroom for another drink
of water. I was also ravenous, but none of the tinned or freeze-dried foods
appealed to me that greatly. Especially when fresher things were not that hard
to come by.
I walked back
through those familiar chambers. So I had followed Dworkin's advice. It was a
pity I'd turned my back before I recalled a long list of questions I wished to
ask him. When I turned back again, he was gone.
I climbed. Coming
up out of my cave, I stood atop the blue prominence which held the only
entranceway I knew of. It was a breezy, balmy, springlike morning with only a
few small puffs of cloud to the east. I drew a deep breath for pleasure and
expelled it. Then I stooped and moved the blue boulder to block the opening.
I'd hate to be surprised by a predator should I come this way again in need of
sanctuary.
I took off the
Jewel of Judgment and hung it on a spur of the boulder. Then I moved off about
ten paces.
Hi, Dad.
The Ghostwheel
was a golden Frisbee, come sailing out of the west.
Good morning,
Ghost.
Why are you
abandoning that device? It's one of the most powerful tools I've ever seen.
I'm not
abandoning it, but I'm about to summon the Sign of the Logrus, and I don't
think they'd get on too well. I'm even a little leery over how the Logrus will
take to me with this higher-order Pattern attunement I'm wearing.
Perhaps I'd
better move along and check back with you later.
Stick around, I
said. Maybe you can bail me out if this turns into a problem.
I summoned the
Sign of the Logrus then, and it came and hovered before me, and nothing happened.
I shifted a part of my awareness into the jewel, there on the side of the
boulder, and through it I was able to perceive the Logrus from another
perspective. Eerie. Also painless.
I centered myself
within my own skull once again, extended my arms into the Logrus limbs,
reached... In less than a minute I had a plate of buttermilk pancakes, a side
order of sausages, a cup of coffee, and a glass of orange juice.
I could have
gotten them for you faster than that, Ghost remarked.
I'm sure you
could have, I said. I was just testing systems.
As I ate, I tried
to sort my priorities. When I finished, I sent the dishes back where they had
come from, retrieved the Jewel, hung it about my neck, and stood.
Okay, Ghost.
Time to head back to Amber, I said.
He expanded and
opened and sank, so that I stood before a golden arch. I stepped forward
and back into my
apartment.
Thanks, I said.
De nada, Dad.
Listen, I've a question: When you summoned breakfast, did you notice anything
at all unusual in the way the Logrus Sign behaved?
How do you mean
that? I asked as I moved to wash my hands.
Let's start wich
physical sensations. Did it seem... sticky?
That's an odd
way to put it, I said. But as a matter of fact, it did seem to take slightly
longer than usual to disengage. Why do you ask?
A peculiar
notion has just occurred to me. Can you do Pattern magic?
Yeah, but I'm
better at the Logrus variety.
You might want
to try them both and compare them if you get a chance.
W hy?
I'm actually
starting to get hunches. I'll tell you as soon as I've checked this one out.
Ghostwheel was
gone.
Shit, I said,
and I washed my face.
I looked out the
window, and a handful of snowflakes blew by. I fetched a key from my desk
drawer. There were a couple of things I wanted to get out of the way
immediately.
I stepped into
the corridor. I had not gone more than a few paces before I heard the sound. I
halted and listened. Then I continued, past the stairway, the sound growing
steadily in volume as I advanced. By the time I reached the long corridor which
ran past the library I knew . that Random was back because I didn't know of
anyone else around here who could drum like that-or would dare to use the
King's drums if he could.
I continued on
past the half opened door to the corner, where I turned right. My first impulse
had been to enter, give him back the Jewel of Judgment, and try to explain what
had happened. Then I recalled Flora's advice that anything honest,
straightforward, and above-board would always get you in trouble here. While I
hated to give her credit for having enunciated a general rule, I could see that
in this particular instance it would cettainly tie me up with a lot of
explaining when then were other things I wanted to be about-and, for that
matter, it might also get me ordered not to do some of 'them.
I continued to
the far entrance to the dining room, where I checked quickly and determined the
place to be deserted. Good. Inside and to the right, as I recalled; there was a
sliding panel which would get me into a hollow section of wall beside the
library, furnished with pegs or a ladder that would take me up to a hidden
entrance to the library's balcony. It could also take me down through the
spiral stair's shaft and into the caverns below, if memory served. I hoped I
never had reason to check that part out, but I was sufficiently into family
tradition these days that I wanted to do a little spying, as several muttered
exchanges as I'd passed the opened door led me to believe that Random was not
alone in there. If knowledge really is power, then I needed all I could get my
hands on, as I'd felt especially vulnerable for some time now.
Yes, the panel
slid, and I was through it in a trice, sending my spirit-light on ahead. I
hand-over-handed my way quickly to the top and opened the panel there slowly
and quietly, feeling grateful to whoever had thought to conceal its space with
a wide chair. I was able to see around the chair's right arm with comparative
safety from detection-a good view of the room's north end.
And there was
Random, drumming, and Martin, all chains and leather, was seated before him,
listening. Random was doing something I'd never seen done before. He was
playing with five sticks. He had one in each hand, one under each arm, and he
held one in his teeth. And he was revolving them as he played, moving the one
in his mouth to replace the one under his right arm, which replaced the one in
his right hand, which he had switched over to his left hand, the left-hand one
going up beneath his left arm, the left arm one going to his teeth, all without
missing a beat. It was hypnotic. I stared until he wound out the number. His
old set of traps was hardly the fusion drummer's dreamwoeld of translucent
plastic with tipped cymbals the size of battle shields set around the snares, a
mess of tomtoms, and a couple of basses, all lit up like Coral's circle of
fire. Random's set went back to a time before snares grew thin and nervous,
basses shrank, and cymbals caught acromegaly and began to hum.
Never saw that
done before, I heard Martin say. Random shrugged.
Bit of horsing
around, he said. Learned it from Freddie Moore, in the thirties, either at
the Victoria or the Village Vanguard, when he was with Art Hodes and Max
Kaminsky. I forget which place. It goes back to vaudeville, when they didn't
have any mikes and the lighting was bad. Had to do show-off things like that,
or dress funny, he told me, to keep the audience paying attention.
Shame they had
to cater to the crowd that way.
Yeah, none of
you guys would dream of dressing funny or throwing your instruments around.
There followed a
silence, and there was no way I could see the expression on Martin's face.
Then, I meant it different from that, Martin said.
Yeah, me, too,
Random replied. Then he tossed three of the sticks down and began to play
again.
I leaned back and
listened. A moment later I was startled to hear an alto sax come in. When I
looked again, Martin was standing, his back still to me, and playing the thing.
It must have been on the floor on the other side of his chair. There was a
Richie Cole flavor to it that I rather liked, and it kind of surprised me. As
much as I enjoyed it, I felt that I did not belong in this room right now, and
I edged back, opened the panel, passed through, and closed it. After I'd
climbed down and let myself out, I decided to cut through the dining room
rather than pass the library entrance again. The music carried for some
distance thereafter, and I wished , I'd learned a spell of Mandor's for
capturing sounds in precious stones, though I'm not sure how the Jewel of
Judgment would have taken to containing Wild Man Blues.
I was planning on
walking up the east corridor to the point where it intersected with the north
one in the vicinity of my apartment, turning left there, and taking the stairs
up to the royal suite, knocking on the door, and returning the Jewel to Vialle,
whom I hoped I could get to take a rain check on explanations. And if not, I'd
rather explain to her than to Random anyway. I could leave out a !ot that she
wouldn't know to ask me. Of course, Random would catch up with me with
questions eventually. But the later, the better.
But then I was
going right past my father's rooms. I'd brought along the key so that I could
stop in later, for what I considered obvious reasons. Still, since I was
already on the spot, it would be more time-effective. I unlocked the door,
opened it, and stepped inside.
The silver rose
was gone from the bud vase on the dresser. Odd. I took a step toward it. There
came a sound of voices from the other room, too soft for me to distinguish
words. I froze. He might well be in there. But you don't just go bursting into
someone's bedroom, especially when it's likely there's company
present-particularly when it's your father's room and you had to unlock an
outer door to get where you were. Suddenly I was extremely self-conscious. I
wanted to get out of there, fast. I unbuckled my sword belt, from which
Grayswandir depended in its not-quite-perfect fit of a sheath. I did not dare
bear it any farther but hung it from one of the garment pegs on the wall near
the door next to a short trench coat I hadn't noticed before. I slipped out
then and locked the door as quietly as I could.
Awkward. Was he
really coming and going with some regularity, somehow managing to avoid notice?
Or was some sort of phenomenon of an entirely different order in progress
within his quarters? I'd heard an occasional rumor that some of the older
chambers had sub specie spatium doorways, if one could but figure how to
activate them, providing considerable extra closet space as well as private
means of entry and egress. Something else I should have asked Dworkin about.
Maybe I've got a pocket universe under my bed. I'd never looked.
I turned and
walked quickly away. As I neared the corner, I slowed. Dworkin had felt that
the presence of the Jewel of Judgment on my person was the thing that' had
protected me from the Pattern, had it really tempted to harm me earlier. On the
other hand, the Jewel, worn too long, could itself do damage to the wearer.
Therefore, he had counseled me to get some rest and then pass my mind through
the stone's matrix; in effect creating a recording of a higher power of the
Pattern within me along with some measure of immunity to assaults by the
Pattern itself. Interesting conjecture. And that's all it was, of course:
conjecture.
When I reached
the cross corridor where a left would take me to the stairway or a right back
to my rooms, I hesitated. There was a sitting room diagonally across the way,
to the left, across from Benedict's seldom used rooms. I headed for it,
entered, sank into a heavy chair in the corner. All I wanted to do was deal
with my enemies, help my friends, get my name off any shit lists it currently
occupied, locate my father, and come to some sort of terms with the sleeping
ty'iga. Then I could see about the continuance of my interrupted Wanderjahr.
All of which, I realized, required that I now reask myself the now
near-rhetorical question, How much of my business did I want Random to know?
I thought of him
in the library, playing a duet with his near-estranged son. I understood that
he had once been pretty wild and footloose and nasty, that he hadn't really
wanted the job of ruling this archetypal world. But parenthood, marriage, and
the Unicorn's choice seemed to have laid a lot on him-deepening his character,
I suppose, at the price of a lot of the fun things in his life. Right now he
seemed to have a lot of problems with this Kashfa-Begma business, possibly
having just resorted to an assassination and agreed to a less than favorable
treaty to maintain the complex political forces of the Golden Circle at an even
level. And who knew what might be going on elsewhere to add to his troubles?
Did I really want to draw this man into something I might well be able to
handle myself with his never being any the wiser, or ever even bothered,
concerning it? Conversely, if I did draw him into my affairs, it seemed likely
that he might well lay restrictions on me which could hamper my ability to
respond to what seemed the daily exigencies of my life. It could also raise
another matter which had been shunted aside years ago.
I had never sworn
allegiance to Amber. Nobody had ever asked me to. After all, I was Corwin's
son, and I had come to Amber willingly and made my home here for some time
before going off to the shadow Earth, where so many of the Amberites had gone
to school. I returned often, and I seemed to be on good terms with everyone. I
didn't really see why the concept of dual citizenship shouldn't apply.
I'd rather the
matter did not come up at all, though. I did not like the thought of being
forced to choose between Amber and the Courts. I wouldn't do it for the Unicorn
and the Serpent, the Pattern and the Logrus, and I didn't care to do it for the
royalty of either court.
All of which
indicated that Vialle should not have even a sketchy edition of my story. Any
version at all would require an eventual accounting. However, if the Jewel were
returned without an explanation of where it had been, then no one would know to
come after me on the matter, and things would still be set right. How could I
lie if I were not even asked questions?
I mulled that
along a little further. What I would actually be doing would be to save a
tired, troubled man the burden of additional problems. There was nothing he
could or should do about most of my affairs. Whatever was going on between the
Pattern and the Logrus seemed mainly important as a metaphysical affair. I
couldn't see where much good or bad might come out of it on a practical level.
And if I saw something coming, I could always tell Random then.
Okay. That's one
nice thing about reasoning abilities. You can use them to make yourself feel
virtuous rather than, say, guilty. I stretched and cracked my knuckles.
Ghost? I said
softly.
No response.
I reached for my
Trumps, but even as I touched them, a wheel of light flashed on across the
room.
You did hear
me, I said.
I felt your
need, came the reply.
Whatever, I
said, drawing the Jewel's chain up over my head and holding the stone out
before me. Do you think you could return this to its secret compartment beside
the fireplace in the royal suite without anyone's being any wiser? I asked.
I'm leery about
touching that thing, Ghost responded. I don't know what its structure might
do to my structure.
Okay, I said.
I guess I'll find a way to do it myself then. But the time has come to test a
hypothesis. If the Pattern attacks me, try to whisk me to safety, please.
Very well.
I set the Jewel
on a nearby table.
After about a
half minute I realized that I had braced myself against the Pattern's death
stroke. I relaxed my shoulders. I drew a deep breath. I remained intact. Could
be that Dworkin was right and the Partern would leave me alone. Also, I should
be able to summon the Pattern in the Jewel now, he told me, as I do the Sign of
the Logrus. There were Pattern-magics which could only be wrought via this
route, though Dworkin hadn't taken the time to instruct me in their employment.
He'd suggested that a sorcerer should be able to figure the system out. I
decided that this could wait. I was in no mood just now for commerce of any
sort with the Pattern in any of its incarnations.
Hey, Pattern, I
said. Want to call it even?
There came no
reply.
I believe it is
aware of you here and what you just did, Ghost said. I feel its presence.
Could be you're off the hook.
Could be, I
responded, taking out my Trumps and sorting through them.
Whom would you
like to get in touch with? Ghost asked.
I'm curious
about Luke, I said. I want to see whether he's okay. And I'm wondering about
Mandor. I assume you sent him to a safe place.
Oh, nothing but
the best, Ghost replied. Same for Queen Jasra. Did you want her, too?
Not really. In
fact, I don't want any of them. I just wanted to see-
Ghost winked out
while I was still talking. I wasn't at all certain that his eagerness to please
was an improvement over his earlier belligerence.
I withdrew Luke's
card and went inside it.
I heard someone
passing along the corridor. The footsteps went on by.
I felt Luke's
awareness, though no vision of his circumstances reached me.
Luke, you hear
me? I inquired.
Yep, he
answered. You okay, Merle?
I'm all right,
I said. How about yourself? That was quite a fight you-
I'm fine.
I hear your
voice, but I can't see a thing.
Got a blackout
on the Trumps. You don't know how to do that?
Never looked
into the matter. Have to get you to teach me sometime. Uh, why are they blacked
out anyway?
Somebody might
get in touch and figure what I'm up to.
If you're about
to lead a commando raid on Amber; I'm going to be highly pissed.
Come on! You
know I swore off? This is something entirely different.
Thought you were
a prisoner of Dalt's.
My status is
unchanged.
Well, he damn
near killed you once and he just beat the shit out of you the other day.
The first time
he'd stumbled into an old berserker spell Sharu'd left behind for a trap; the
second time was business. I'll be okay. But right now everything I'm up to is
hush-hush, and I've got to run. G'bye.
Gone Luke, the
presence.
The footsteps had
halted, and I'd heard a knocking on a nearby door. After a time I heard a door
being opened, then closed. I had not overheard any exchange of words. In that
it had been nearby and that the two nearest apartments were Benedict's and my
own, I began to wonder. I was fairly certain that Benedict was not in his, and
I recalled not having locked my own door when I had stepped out. Therefore...
Picking up the
Jewel of Judgment, I crossed the room and stepped out into the hall. I checked
Benedict's door. Locked. I looked down the north-south hallway and walked back
to the stairway and checked around in that area. There was no one in sight. I
strode up to my own place then and stood listening for a time outside each of
my doors. No sounds from within. The only alternatives I could think of were
Gerard's rooms, back down the side corridor, and Brand's, which lay behind my
own. I had thought of knocking out a wall-in keeping with the recent spirit of
remodeling and redecorating Random had gotten into-adding Brand's rooms to my
own, for a very good-size apartment. The rumor that his were haunted, though,
and the wailings I sometimes heard through the walls late at night dissuaded
me.
I took a quick
walk then, knocking on and finally trying both Brand's and Gerard's doors. No
response, and both were locked. Odder and odder.
Frakir had given
a quick pulse when I'd touched Brand's door, and while I'd gone on alert for
several moments, nothing untoward had approached. I was about to dismiss it as
a disturbing reaction to the remnants of eldritch spells I had occasionally
seen drifting about the vicinity when I noticed that the Jewel of Judgment was
pulsing.
I raised the
chain and stared into the gem. Yes, an image had taken form. I beheld the
hallway around the corner, my two doors, and intervening artwork on the wall in
plain view. The doorway to the left-the one that let upon my bedroom-seemed to
be outlined in red and pulsing. Did that mean I was supposed to avoid it or
rush in there? That's the trouble with mystical advice.
I walked back and
turned the corner again. This time the gem-perhaps having felt my query and
decided some editing was in order-showed me approaching and opening the door it
was indicating. Of course, of the two, that door was locked...
I fumbled for my
key, reflecting that I could not even rush in with a drawn blade, having just
disposed of Grayswandir. I did have a couple of tricky spells hung, though.
Maybe one of them would save me if the going got too rough. Maybe not, too.
I turned the key
and flung the door open.
Merle! she
shrieked, and I saw that it was Coral. She stood beside my bed, where her
putative sister the ty'iga was reclined. She quickly moved one hand behind her
back. You, uh, surprised me.
Vice versa, I
replied, for which there is an equivalent in Thari. What's up, lady?
I came back to
tell you that I located my father and gave him a soothing story about that
Corridor of Mirrors you told me about. Is there really such a place here?
Yes. You won't
find it in any guides, though. It comes and goes. So, he's mollified?
Uh-huh. But now
he's wondering where Nayda is.
This gets
trickier.
Yes.
She was blushing,
and she did not meet my eyes readily. She seemed aware, too, that I was noting
her discomfort.
I told him that
perhaps Nayda was exploring, as I'd been, she went on, and that I'd ask after
her.
Mm-hm.
I shifted my gaze
to Nayda. Coral immediately moved forward and brushed against me. She placed a
hand on my shoulder, drew me toward her.
I thought you
were going to sleep, she said.
Yes, I was. Did,
too. I was running some errands just now.
I don't
understand, she said.
Time lines, I
explained. I economized. I'm rested.
Fascinating,
she said, brushing my lips with her own. I'm glad that you're rested.
Coral, I said,
embracing her briefly, you don't have to bullshit me. You know I was dead
tired when you left. You had no reason to believe that I'd be anything but
comatose if you returned this soon.
I caught hold of
her left wrist behind her back and drew her hand around to the front, raising
it between us. She was surprisingly strong. And I made no effort to pry open
her hand, for I could see between the fingers what it was that she held. It was
one of the metal balls Mandor often used to create impromptu spells. I released
her hand. She did not draw away from me, but rather, I can explain, she said,
finally meeting my gaze and holding it.
I wish you
would, I said. In fact, I wish you'd done it a bit sooner.
Maybe the story
you heard about her being dead and her body the host for a demon is true, she
said. But she's been good to me recently. She's finally become the sister I'd
always wished she'd been. Then you brought me back here and I saw her like
that, not knowing what you really planned to do with her-
I want you to
know that I wouldn't hurt her, Coral, I interrupted. I owe her-it-for favors
past. When I was young and naive on the shadow Earth, she probably saved my
neck, several times. You have no reason to fear for her here.
She cocked her
head to the right and narrowed one eye. I'd no way of knowing that, she said,
from what you told me I came back, hoping to get in, hoping you were deeply
asleep, hoping I could break the spell or at least lift it enough to talk with
her. I wanted to find out for myself whether she was really my sister-or
something else.
I sighed. I
reached out to squeeze her shoulder and realized I was still clutching the
Jewel of Judgment in my left hand. I squeezed her arm with my right hand
instead and said, Look, I understand. It was boorish of me to show you your
sister laid out that way and not to have gone into a little more detail. I can
only plead industrial fatigue and apologize. I promise you she's in no pain.
But I really don't want to mess with this spell right now because it's not one
of mine-'
Just then Nayda
moaned softly. I studied her for several minutes, but nothing more followed.
Did you pluck
that metal ball out of the air? I asked. I don't recall seeing one for the
final spell.
Coral shook her
head.
It was lying on
her breast. One of her hands was over it, she said.
What prompted
you to check there?
The position
looked unnatural, that's all. Here.
She handed me the
ball. I took it and weighed it in the palm of my right hand. I had no idea how
the things functioned. The metal balls were to Mandor what Frakir was to me-a
piece of idiosyncratic personal magic, forged out of his unconscious in the
heart of the Logrus.
Are you going to
put it back? she asked.
No, I told her.
Like I said, it wasn't one of my spells. I don't know how it works, and I
don't want to fool around with it.
Merlin..?"-whispered,
from Nayda, her eyes still closed.
We'd better go
talk in the next room, I said to Coral. I'll lay a spell of my own on her
first, though. Just a simple soporific-
The air sparkled
and spun behind Coral, and she must have guessed from my stare that something
was going on, for she turned.
Merle, what is
it? she asked, retreating toward me as a golden archway took form.
Ghost? I said.
Right, came the
reply Jasra was not where I left her. But I brought your brother.
Mandor, still
clad mainly in black, his hair a great mass of silver-white, appeared suddenly,
glancing at Coral and Nayda, focusing on me, beginning to smile, stepping
forward. Then his gaze shifted, and he halted. He stared. I had never seen that
frightened expression on his face before.
Bloody Eye of
Chaos! he exclaimed, summoning up a protective screen with a gesture. How did
you come by it?
He took a step
backward. The arch immediately collapsed into a gold-leaf calligraphed letter
O, and Ghost slid around the room to hover at my right side.
Suddenly Nayda
sat up on my bed, darting wild glances.
Merlin! she
cried. Are you all right?
So far so good,
I answered. Not to worry . Take it easy. All's well.
Who's been
tampering with my spell? Mandor asked as Nayda swung her legs over the side of
the bed and Coral cringed.
It was a sort of
accident, I said.
I opened my right
hand. The metal sphere immediately levitated and shot off in hip direction,
narrowly missing Coral, whose hands were now extended in a general martial arts
defense pattern, though she seemed uncertain what or whom she should be
defending against. So she kept turning-Mandor, Nayda, Ghost, repeat...
Cool it, Coral,
I said. You're in no danger.
The left eye of
the Serpent! Nayda cried. Free me, oh, Formless One, and I will pledge with
mine! Frakir in the meantime was warning me that all was not well, in case I
hadn't noticed.
Just what the
hell is going on? I yelled.
Nayda sprang to
her feet, lunged forward, and with that unnatural demon strength snatched the
Jewel of Judgment from my hand, pushed me aside, and tore into the hallway.
I stumbled,
recovered.
WHold that
ty'iga! I cried, and the Ghostwheel aasl past me followed by Mandor's balls.
X
I was the next
thing out into the hallway. I turned left and started running. A ty'iga may be
fast, but so am I.
I thought you
were supposed to be protecting me! I shouted after her.
This takes
precedence, she answered, over your mother's binding.
What? I said.
My mother?
She placed me
under a geas to take care of you when you went off to school, she replied.
This breaks it! Free at last!
Damn! I
observed.
Then, as she
neared the stairway, the Sign of the Logrus appeared before her, larger than
any I'd ever summoned, filling the corridor from wall to wall, roiling,
sprawling, fire-shot, tentacular, a reddish haze of menace drifting about it.
It took a certain measure of chutzpah for it to manifest like that here in
Amber on the Pattern's turf, so I knew the stakes were high.
Receive me, oh,
Logrus, she cried, for I bear the Eye of the Serpent, and the Logrus opened,
creating a fiery tunnel at its center. I could somehow tell that its other end
was not a place further along my hallway.
But then Nayda
was halted, as if she had suddenly encountered a glass partition, and she
stiffened into a position of attention. Three of Mandor's gleaming spheres were
suddenly orbiting her cataleptic form.
I was thrown from
my feet and pressed back against the wall. I raised my right arm to block
whatever might be coming down on me, as I looked backward.
An image of the
Pattern itself, as large as the Logrus Sign, had just put in an appearance only
a few feet behind me, manifesting about as far in that direction from Nayda as
the Logrus was before her, parenthesizing the lady or the ty'iga between the
poles of existence, so to speak, and incidentally enclosing me along with her.
The area about me near the Pattern grew bright as a sunny morning while that at
the other end took on the aspect of a baleful twilight. Were they about to
reenact the Big Bang/Crunch, I wondered, with me as an unwilling momentary
witness?
Uh, Your Honors,
I began, feeling obliged to try talking them out of it and wishing I were Luke,
who just might be able to swing such a feat. This is a perfect time to employ
an impartial arbitrator, and I just happen to be uniquely qualified if you will
but reflect-
The golden
circlet that I knew to be Ghostwheel suddenly dropped over Nayda's head,
lengthening itself downward into a tube. Ghost had fitted himself within the
orbits of Mandor's spheres and must somehow have insulated himself against
whatever forces they were execting, for they slowed, wobbled, and finally
dropped to the floor, two striking the wall ahead of me and one rolling down
the stairway ahead and to the right.
The Signs of the
Pattern and the Logrus began to advance then, and I crawled quickly to keep
ahead of the Pattern.
Don't come any
closer, fellows, Ghostwheel suddenly announced. There's no telling what I
might do if you make me even more nervous than I already am.
Both Power Signs
halted in their advances. From around the corner to the left, up ahead, I heard
Droppa's drunken voice, raised in some bawdy ballad, coming this way. Then it
grew silent. Several moments passed, and he began singing Rock of Ages in a
far, far weaker voice. Then this, too, was cut off, followed by a heavy thud
and the sound of breaking glass.
It occurred to me
that I should be able, from a distance such as this, to extend my awareness
into the Jewel. But I was uncertain what effects I might then be able to
produce with the thing, considering the fact that none of the four principals
involved in the confrontation was human.
I felt the
beginnings of a Trump contact. Yes? I whispered.
Dworkin's voice
came to me then.
Whatever control
you may have over the thing, he said, use it to keep the Jewel away from the
Logrus.
Just then a
crackly voice, shifting in pitch and gender from syllable to syllable, emerged
from the red tunnel. Return the Eye of Chaos, it said. The Unicorn took it
from the Serpent when they fought, in the beginning. It was stolen. Return it.
Return it.
The blue face I
had seen above the Pattern did not materialize, but the voice I'd heard at that
time responded, It was paid for with blood and pain. Title passed.
The Jewel of
Judgment and the Eye of Chaos or Eye of the Serpent are different tames for the
same stone? I said.
Yes, Dworkin
replied.
What happens if
the Serpent gets its eye back? I inquired.
The universe
will probably come to an end.
Oh, I observed.
What am I bid
for the thing? Ghost asked.
Impetuous
construct, the voice of the Pattern intoned.
Rash artifact,
wailed the Logrus.
Save the
compliments, Ghost said, and give me something I want.
I could tear it
from you, the Pattern responded.
I could have you
apart and it away in an instant, stated the Logrus.
But neither of
you will do it, Ghost answered, because such a focusing of your attention and
energies would leave either of you vulnerable to the other.
In my mind, I
heard Dworkin chuckle.
Tell me why this
confrontation need take place at all, Ghost went on, after all this time.
The balance was
tipped against me by recent actions of this turncoat, the Logrus replied-a
burst of fire occurring above my head, presumably to demonstrate the identity
of the turncoat in question.
I smelled burning
hair, and I warded the flame.
Just a minute!
I cried. I wasn't given much choice in the matter!
But there was a
choice, wailed the Logrus, and you made it.
Indeed, he did,
responded the Pattern. But it served only to redress the balance you'd tipped
in your own favor.
Redress? You
overcompensated! Now it's tipped in your favor! Besides, it was accidentally
tipped my way, by the traitor's father. Another fireball followed, and I
warded again. It was not my doing.
You probably
inspired it.
If you can get
the Jewel to me, Dworkin said, I can put it out of reach of both of them
until this matter is settled.
I don't know
whether I can get hold of it, I said, but I'll remember that.
Give it to me,
the Logrus said to Ghost, and I will take you with me as First Servant.
You are a
processor of data, said the Pattern. I will give you knowledge such as none
in all of Shadow possess.
I will give you
power, said the Logrus.
Not interested,
said Ghost, and the cylinder spun and vanished.
The girl, the
Jewel, and everything were gone.
The Logrus
wailed, the Pattern growled, and the Signs of both Powers rushed to meet,
somewhere near Bleys's nearer room.
I raised every
protective spell that I could. Behind me I could feel Mandor doing the same. I
covered my head, I drew up my knees, I
I was falling.
Through a bright, soundless concussion. Bits of debris struck me. From several
directions. I'd a hunch that I had just bought the farm and that I was about to
die without opportunity to reveal my insight into the nature of reality: The
Pattern did not care about the children of Amber any more than the Logrus did
about those of the Courts of Chaos. The Powers cared, perhaps, about themselves,
about each other, about heavy cosmic principles, about the Unicorn and the
Serpent, of which they were very probably but geometric manifestations They did
not care about me, about Coral, about Mandor, probably not even about Oberon or
Dworkin himself. We were totally insignificant or at most tools or sometimes
annoyances, to be employed or destroyed as the occasion warranted
Give me your
hand, Dworkin said, and I saw him, as in a Trump contact. I reached and
fell hard at his
feet upon a colorful rug spread over a stone floor, in a windowless chamber my
father had once described to me, filled with books and exotic artifacts, lit by
bowls of light which hung without visible means of support high in the air.
Thanks, I said,
rising slowly, brushing myself off, massaging a sore spot in my left thigh.
Caught a whiff
of your thoughts, he said There's more to it.
I'm sure. But
sometimes I enjoy being bleak-minded. How much of that crap the Powers were
arguing about was true?
Oh, all of it,
Dworkin said, by their lights The biggest bar to understanding is the
interpretation they put on each other's doings. That, and the fact that
everything can always be pushed another step backward such as the break in
the Pattern having strengthened the Logrus and the possibility that the Logrus
actively influenced Brand into doing it. But then the Logrus might claim this
was in retaliation for the Day of the Broken Branches several centuries ago.
I haven't heard
about that one, I said.
He shrugged.
I'm not surprised.
It wasn't all that important a matter, except to them. What I'm saying is that
to argue as they do is to head into an infinite regression-back to first
causes, which are always untrustworthy.
So what's the
answer?
Answer? This
isn't a classroom There are no answers that would matter, except to a
philosopher-that is, none with any practical applications.
He poured a small
cup of green liquid from a silver flask and passed it to me.
Drink this, he
said.
It's a little
early in the day for me.
It's not
refreshment. It's medication, he explained. You're in a state of near shock,
whether you've noticed or not.
I tossed the
thing off, and it burned like a liquor but didn't seem to be one. I did feet
myself beginning to relax during the next few minutes, in places I had not even
realized I was tense.
Coral,
Mandor... I said.
He gestured, and
a glowing globe descended, drew nearer. He signed the air with a half familiar
gesture, and something like the Logrus Sign without the Logrus came over me. A
picture formed within the globe.
That long section
of hallway where the encounter had occurred had been destroyed, along with the
stairs, Benedict's apartment, and possibly Gerard's as well. Also, Bleys's
rooms, portions of my own, the sitting room I had been occupying but a short
time before, and the northeast corner of the library were missing, as were the
floor and ceiling. Below, I could see that sections of the kitchen and armory
had been hit, and possibly more across the way Looking upward-magic globes
being wondrous accommodating-I could see sky, which meant that the blast had
gone through the third and fourth floors, possibly damaging the royal suite
along with the upper stairways and maybe the laboratory-and who knew what all
else.
Standing on the
edge of the abyss near what had been a section of Bleys's or Gerard's quarters
was Mandor, his right arm apparently broken, hand tucked in behind his wide
black belt. Coral leaned heavily upon his left shoulder, and there was blood on
her face. I am not sure that she was fully conscious. Mandor held her about the
waist with his left arm, and a metal ball circled the two of them. Diagonally
across the abyss, Random stood on a heavy crossbeam near the opening to the
library. I believe Martin was standing atop a short stack, below and to the
rear. He was still holding his sax. Random appeared more than a little agitated
and seemed to be shouting.
Voice! Voice!' I
said. Dworkin waved.
-ucking Lord of
Chaos blowing up my palace! Random was saying.
The lady is
injured, Your Highness, Mandor said. Random passed a hand across his face.
Then he looked upward.
If there's an
easy way to get her to my quarters, Vialle is very skilled in certain areas of
medicine, he said in a softer voice. So am I, for that matter.
Just where is
that, Your Highness?
Random leaned to
his side and pointed upward. Looks as if you won't need the door to get in,
but I can't tell whether there's enough stairway left to get up there or where
you might cross to it if there is.
I'll make it,
Mandor said, and two more of the balls came rushing to him and set themselves
into eccentric orbits about him and Coral. Shortly thereafter they were
levitated and drifted slowly toward the opening Random had indicated.
I'll be along
shortly, Random called after them. He looked as if he were about to add
something, but then regarded the devastation, lowered his head, and turned
away. I did the same thing.
Dworkin was
offering me another dose of the green medicine, and I took it. Some sort of
trank, it seemed, in addition to whatever else it did.
I have to go to
her, I told him. I like that lady, and I want to be sure she's all right.
I can certainly
send you there, Dworkin said, though I cannot think of anything you could do
for her which will not be done well by others. Perhaps the time were more
profitably spent in pursuit of that errant construct of yours the Ghostwheel.
It must be persuaded to return the Jewel of Judgment.
Very well, I
acknowledged. But I want to see Coral first.
Your appearance
could cause considerable delay, he said, because of explanations which may be
required of you.
I don't care, I
told him.
All right. A
moment then.
He moved away and
took down what appeared to be a sheathed wand from the wall, where it had hung
suspended from a peg. He hung the sheath upon his belt, then crossed to a small
cabinet and removed a flat leather-bound case from one of its drawers. It
rattled with a faint metallic sound as he slipped it into a pocket. A small
jewelry box vanished up a sleeve without any sound.
Come this way,
he told me, approaching and taking my hand.
He turned me and
led me toward the room's darkest corner, where I had not noted that a tall,
curiously framed mirror hung. It exhibited an odd reflective capacity in that
it showed us and the room behind us with perfect clarity from a distance, but
the closer we approached to its surface, the more indistinct all of its images
became. Icould see what was coming, coming. But I still tensed as Dworkin, a
pace in advance of me by then, stepped through its foggy surface and jerked me
after him.
I stumbled and
regained my footing, coming to myself in the good half of the blasted royal
suite in front of a decorative mirror. I reached back quickly and tapped it
with my fingertips, but its surface remain solid. The short, stooped figure of
Dworkin stood before me, and he still had hold of my right hand. Looking past
that profile, which in some ways caricatured my own, I saw that the bed had
been moved eastward, away from the broken corner and a large opening formerly
occupied by a section of flooring. Random and Vialle stood on the near side of
the bed, their backs to us. They were studying Coral, who was stretched out
upon the counterpane and appeared to be unconscious. Mandor, seated in a heavy
chair at they bed's foot, observing operations, was the first to notice our
presence, which he acknowledged with a nod.
How... is she?
I asked.
Concussion,
Mandor replied, and damage to the right eye.
Random turned.
Whatever he was about to say to me died on his lips when he realized who stood
beside me.
Dworkin! he
said. It's been so long. I didn't know whether you were still alive. Are you...
all right?
The dwarf
chuckled.
I read your
meaning, and I'm rational, he replied. I would like to examine the lady now.
Of course,
Random answered, moving aside.
Merlin, Dworkin
said; see whether you can locate that Ghostwheel device of yours, and ask it
to return the artifact it borrowed.
I understand, I
said, reaching for my Trumps.
Moments later I
was reaching, reaching...
I felt your
intent several moments ago, Dad.
Well, do you
have the Jewel or don't you?
Yes, I just
finished with it.
'Finished'?
Finished
utilizing it.
In what fashion
did you... utilize it?
As I understood
from you that passing one's awareness through it would give some protection
against the Pattern, I wondered whether it might work for an ideally synthesized
being such as myself.
That's a nice
term, 'ideally synthesized. ' Where'd it come from?
I coined it
myself when seeking the most appropriate designation.
I've a hunch
it'll reject you.
It didn't.
Oh. You actually
got all the way through the thing?
I did.
What effect did
it have upon you?
That's a hard
thing to assess. My perceptions are altered. It's difficult to explain...It's
subtle, whatever it is.
Fascinating. Can
you move yoar awareness into the stone from a distance now?
Yes.
When all of our
present troubles have passed, I'm going to want to test you again.
I'm curious
myself to know what's changed.
In the meantime,
there is a need for the Jewel here.
Coming through.
The air shimmered
before me.
Ghostwheel
appeared as a silver circlet, the Jewel of Judgment at its center. I cupped my
hand and collected it. I took it to Dworkin, who did not even glance at me as
he received it. I looked down at Coral's face and looked away quickly, wishing
I hadn't.
I moved back near
Ghost.
Where's Nayda?
I asked.
I'm not sure,
he replied. She asked me to leave her-there near the crystal cave-after I took
the Jewel away from her.
What was she
doing?
Crying.
Why?
I suppose
because both of her missions in life have been frustrated. She was charged to
guard you unless some wild chance brought her the opportunity of obtaining the
Jewel, in which instance she was released from the first directive. This
actually occurred; only I deprived her of the stone. Now she is bound to
neither course.
You'd think
she'd be happy to be free at last. She wasn't on either job as a matter of
choice. She can go back to doing whatever carefree demons do beyond the
Rimwall.
Not exactly,
Dad.
What do you
mean?
She seems to be
stuck in that body. Apparently she can't simply abandon it the way she could
others she's used. It has something to do with there being no primary
occupant.
Oh. I suppose
she could, uh, terminate and get loose that way.
I suggested
that, but she's not sure it would work that way. It might just kill her along
with the body, now that she's bound to it the way she is.
So she's still
somewhere near the cave?
No. She retains
her ty'iga powers, which make her something of a magical being. I believe she
must simply have wandered off through Shadow while I was in the cave
experimenting with the Jewel.
Why the cave?
That's where you
go to do clandestine things, isn't it?
Yeah. So how
come I could reach you there with the Trump?
I'd already
finished the experiment and departed. In fact, I was looking for her when you
called.
I think you'd
better go and look some more.
Why?
Because I owe
her for favors past-even if my mother did sic her on me.
Certainly. I'm
not sure how successful I'll be, though. Magical beings don't track as readily
as the more mundane sort.
Give it a shot
anyway. I'd like to know where she's gotten to and whether there's anything I
can do for her. Maybe your new orientation will be of help -somehow.
We'll see, he
said, and he winked out.
I sagged. How was
Orkus going to take it? I wondered. One daughter injured and the other
possessed of a demon and wandering, off in Shadow. I moved to the foot of the
bed and leaned against Mandor's chair. He reached up with his left hand and
squeezed my arm.
I don't suppose
you learned anything about bonesetting off on that shadow-world, did you? he
inquired.
Afraid not, I
answered.
Pity, he
replied. I'll just have to wait my turn.
We can Trump you
somewhere and get it taken care of right away, I said, reaching for my cards.
No, he said. I
want to see things played out here.
While he was
speaking, I noticed that Random seemed engaged in an intense Trump
communication. Vialle stood nearby, as if shielding him from the opening in the
wall and whatever might emerge therefrom. Dworkin continued to work upon
Coral's face, his body blocking sight of exactly what he was doing.
Mandor, I said,
did you know that my mother sent the ty'iga to take care of me?
Yes, he
replied. It told me that when you stepped out of the room. A part of the spell
would not permit it to tell you this.
Was she just
there to protect me, or was she spying on me, too?
That I couldn't
tell you. The matter didn't come up. But it does seem her fears were warranted.
You were in danger.
You think Dara
knew about Jasra and Luke?
He began to
shrug, winced, thought better of it.
Again, I don't
know for certain. If she did, I can't answer the next one either: How did she
know? Okay?
Okay.
Random completed
a conversation, covering a Trump: Then he turned and stared at Vialle for some
time. He looked as if he were about to say something, thought better of it,
looked away. He looked at me. About then I heard Coral moan, and I looked away,
rising.
A moment,
Merlin, Random said, before you go rushing off.
I met his gaze.
Whether it was angry or merely curious, I could not tell. The tightening of the
brows, the narrowing of the eyes could indicate either.
Sir? I said.
He approached,
took me by the elbow, and turned me away from the bed, leading me off toward
the doorway to the next room.
Vialle, I'm
borrowing your studio for a few moments, he said.
Surely, she
replied.
He led me inside
and closed the door behind us. Across the room a bust of Gerard had fallen and
broken. What appeared to be her current project-a multilimbed sea creature of a
sort I'd never seen-occupied a work area at the studio's far end.
Random turned on
me suddenly and searched my face.
Have you been
following the Begma-Kashfa situation? ne asked.
More or less, I
replied. Bill briefed me on it the other night. Eregnor and all that.
Did he tell you
that we were going to bring Kashfa into the Golden Circle and solve the Eregnor
problem by recognizing Kashfa's right to that piece of real estate?
I didn't like the
way he'd asked that one, and I didn't want to get Bill in trouble. It had
seemed that that matter was still under wraps when we'd spoken. So, I'm afraid
I don't recall alI the details on this stuff, I said.
Well, that's
what I planned on doing, Random told me. We don't usually make guarantees
like that-the kind that will favor one treaty country at the expense of
another-but Arkans, the Duke of Shadburne, kind of had us over a barrel. He was
the best possible head of state for our purposes, and I'd paved the way for his
taking the throne now that that red-haired bitch is out of the picture. He knew
he could lean on me a bit, though -since he'd be taking a chance accepting the
throne following a double break in the succession-and he asked for Eregnor, so
I gave it to him.
I see, I said,
everything except how this affects me.
He turned his
head and studied me through his left eye.
The coronation
was to be today. In fact, I was going to dress and Trump back for it in a
little while...
You use the past
tense, I observed, to fill the silence he had left before me.
So I do. So I
do, he muttered, turning away, pacing a few steps, resting his foot on a piece
of broken statuary, turning back. The good Duke is now either dead or
imprisoned.
And there will
be no coronation? I said.
Au contraire,
Random replied, still studying my face.
I give up, I
said. Tell me what's going on.
There was a
coup, at dawn, this morning.
Palace?
Possibly that,
too. But it was backed by external military force.
What was
Benedict doing while this was going on?
I ordered him to
pull the troops out yesterday, right before I came home myself. Things seemed
stable, and it wouldn't have looked good to have combat troops from Amber
stationed there during the coronation.
True, I said.
So somebody moved right in, almost as soon as Benedict moved out and did away
with the man who would be king, without the local constabulary even suggesting
that that was not nice?
Random nodded
slowly
That's about the
size of it, he said. Now why do you think that might be?
Perhaps they
were not totally displeased with the new state of affairs.
Random smiled and
snapped his fingers.
Inspired, he
said. One could almost think you knew what was going on.
One would be
wrong, I said.
Today your
former classmate Lukas Raynard becomes Rinaldo I, King of Kashfa.
I'll be damned,
I said. I'd no idea he really wanted that job. What are you going to do about
it?
I think I'll
skip the coronation.
I mean, over a
slightly longer term.
Random sighed and
turned away, kicking at the rubble.
You mean, am I
going to send Benedict back, to depose him?'.
In a word, yes.
That would make
us look pretty bad. What Luke just did is not above the Graustarkian politics
that prevail in the area. We'd moved in and helped straighten out something
that was fast becoming a political shambles. We could go back and do it again,
too, if it were just some half assed coup by a crazy general or some noble with
delusions of grandeur. But Luke's got a legitimate claim, and it actually is
stronger than Shadburne's. Also, he's popular. He's young, and he makes a good
appearance. We'd have a lot less justification for going back than we had for
going in initially. Even so, I was almost willing to risk being called an
aggressor to keep that bitch's homicidal son off the throne. Then my man in
Kashfa tells me that he's under Vialle's protection. So I asked her about it.
She says that it's true and that you were present when it happened. She said
she'd tell me about it after the operation Dworkin's doing now, in case he
needs her empathic abilities. But I can't wait. Tell me what happened.
You tell me one
more thing first.
What is it?
What military
forces brought Luke to power?
Mercenaries.
Dalt's?
Yes.
Okay. Luke
canceled his vendetta against the House of Amber, I said. He did this freely,
following a conversation with Vialle, just the other night. It was then that
she gave him the ring. At the time I thought it was to keep Julian from trying
to kill him, as we were on our way down to Arden.
This was in
response to Dalt's so-called ultimatum regarding Luke and Jasra?
That's right. It
never occurred to me that the whole thing might be a setup-to get Luke and Dalt
together so they could go off and pull a coup. That would mean that even that
fight was staged, and now that I think of it, Luke did have a chance to talk
with Dale before it occurred.
Random raised his
hand.
Wait, he said.
Go back and tell me the thing from the beginning.
Right.
And so I did. By
the time I'd finished we had both paced the length of the studio countless
times.
You know, he
said then, the whole business sounds like something Jasra might have set up
before her career as a piece of furnirure.
The thought had
occurred to me, I said, hoping he wasn't about to pursue the matter of her
present whereabouts. And the more I thought of it, recalling her reaction to
the information about Luke following our raid on the Keep, the more I began to
feel not only that she had been aware of what was going on but that she'd even
been in touch with Luke more recently than I had at that' time.
It was pretty
smoothly done, he observed. Dalt must have been operating under old orders.
Not being certain how to collect Luke or locate Jasra for fresh instructions,
he took a chance with that feint on Amber. Benedict might well have spitted him
again, with equal skill and greater effect.
True. I guess
you have to give the devil his due when it comes to guts. It also means that
Luke must have done a lot of fast plotting and laid that fixed fight out during
their brief conference in Arden. So he was really in control there, and he
conned us into thinking he was a prisoner, which precluded his being the threat
to Kashfa that he really was-if you want to look at it that way.
That other way
is there to look at it?
Well, as you
said yourself, his claim is not exactly without merit. What do you want to do?
Random massaged
his temples.
Going after him,
preventing the coronation, would be a very unpopular move, he said. First,
though, I'm curious. You say this guy's a great bullshitter. You were there.
Did he con Vialle into placing him under her protection?
No, he didn't,
I said. He seemed as surprised as I was at her gesture. He called off the
vendetta because he felt that honor had been satisfied, that he had to an
extent been used by his mother, and out of friendship for me. He did it without
any strings on it. I still think she gave him the ring so the vendetta would
end there, so none of us would go gunning for him.
That is very
like her, Random said. If I thought he'd taken advantage of that, I was going
to go after him myself. The embarrassment for me is unintentional then, and I
guess I can live with it. I prime Arkans for the throne, and then he's shunted
aside at the last minute by someone under my wife's protection. Almost makes it
look as if there's a bit of divisiveness here at the center of things-and I'd
hate to give that impression.
I've got a hunch
Luke will be very conciliatory. I know him well enough to know he appreciates
all of these nuances. I'd guess he'd be a very easy man for Amber to deal with,
on any level.
I'll bet he
will. Why shouldn't he?
No reason, I
said. What's going to happen to that treaty now?
Random smiled.
I'm off the
hook. I never felt right about the Eregnor provisions. Now, if there's to be a
treaty at all, we go at it ab initio. I'm not even sure we need one, though.
The hell with 'em.
I'll bet Arkans
is still alive, I said.
You think Luke's
holding him hostage, against my giving him Golden Circle status?
I shrugged.
How close are
you to Arkans?
Well, I did set
him up for this thing, and I feel I owe him. I don't feel I owe him that much,
though.
Understandable.
There would be
loss of face for Amber even to approach a second-rate power like Kashfa
directly at a time like this.
True, I said,
and for that matter, Luke isn't officially head of state yet.
Arkans would
still be enjoying life at his villa if it weren't for me, though, and Luke
really does seem to be a friend of yours-a scheming friend, but a friend.
You would like
me to mention this during a forthcoming discussion of Tony Price's atomic
sculpture?
He nodded.
I feel you
should have your art discussion very soon. In fact, it would not be
inappropriate for you to attend a friend's coronation-as a private individual.
Your dual heritage will serve us well here, and he will still be honored.
Even so, I'll
bet he wants that treaty.
Even if we were
inclined to grant it, we would not guarantee him Eregnor.
I understand.
And you are not
empowered to commit us to anything.
I understand
that, too.
Then why don't
you clean up a bit and go talk to him about it? Your room is just around the
abyss. You can leave through the hole in the wall and shinny down a beam I
noticed was intact.
Okay, I will, I
answered, moving in that direction. But one question first, completely off the
subject.
Yes?
Has my father
been back recently?
Not to my knowledge,
he said, shaking his head slowly. We're all pretty good at hiding our comings
and goings if we wish, of course. But I think he'd have let me know if he were
around.
Guess so, I
said, and I turned and exited through the wall, skirting the abyss.
XI
No.
I hung from the
beam, swung, and let go. I landed almost gracefully in the middle of the
hallway in an area that would have been located approximately midway between my
two doors, save that the first door was missing, also the section of wall through
which it had provided entrance (or exit, depending on which side you happened
to be), not to mention my favorite chair and a display case which had held
seashells I'd picked up from beaches around the world. Pity.
I rubbed my eyes
and turned away, for even the prospect of my ruined apartment took second place
just now. Hell, I'd had apartments ruined in the past. Usually around April
30...
As in Niagara
Falls, slowly I turned...
No.
Yes. Across the
hall from my rooms, where I had previously faced a blank wall, there was now a
hallway running to the north. I'd gotten a glimpse up its sparkling length as
I'd dropped from my rafter. Amazing. The gods had just uptempoed my background
music yet again. I'd been in that hallway before, in one of its commoner
locations up on the fourth floor, running east-west between a couple of
storerooms. One of Castle Amber's intriguing anomalies, the Corridor of
Mirrors, in addition to seeming longer in one direction than the other,
contained countless mirrors. Literally countless. Try counting them, and you
never come up with the same total twice. Tapers flicker in high, standing
holders, casting infinities of shadows. There are big mirrors, little mirrors,
narrow mirrors, squat mirrors, tinted mirrors, distorting mirrors, mirrors with
elaborate frames-cast or carved-plain, simply framed mirrors, and mirrors with
no frames at all; there are mirrors in multitudes of sharp-angled geometric
shapes, amorphous shapes, curved mirrors.
I had walked the
Corridor of Mirrors on several occasions, sniffing the perfumes of scented
candles, sometimes feeling subliminal presences among the images, things which
faded at an instant's sharp regard. I had felt the mixed enchantments of the
place but had somehow never roused its sleeping genii. Just as well perhaps.
One never knew what to expect in that place; at least that's what Bleys once
told me. He was not certain whether the mirrors propelled one into obscure
realms of Shadow, hypnotized one and induced bizarre dream states, cast one
into purely symbolic realms decorated with the furniture of the psyche, played
malicious or harmless head games with the viewer, none of the above, all of the
above, or some of the above. Whatever, it was something less than harmless,
though, as thieves, servants, and visitors had occasionally been found dead or
stunned and mumbling along that sparkling route, ofttimes wearing highly
unusual expressions. And generally around the solstices and equinoxes-though it
could occur at any season-the corridor moved itself to a new location,
sometimes simply departing altogether for a time. Usually it was treated with
suspicion, shunned, though it could as often reward as injure one or offer a
useful omen or insight as readily as an unnerving experience. It was the
uncertainty of it that roused trepidations.
And sometimes, I
was told, it was almost as if it came looking for a particular person, bearing
its ambiguous gifts. On such occasions it was said to be more dangerous to turn
it down than to accept its invitation.
Aw, come on, I
said. Now?
The shadows
danced along its length, and I caught a I whiff of those intoxicating tapers. I
moved forward. I extended my left hand past its corner and patted the wall.
Frakir didn't stir.
This is Merlin,
I said, and I'm kind of busy just now. You sure you wouldn't rather reflect
someone else?
The nearest flame
seemed, for an instant, a fiery hand, beckoning.
Shit, I
whispered, and I strode forward.
There was no
sense of transition as I entered. A long red-patterned runner coveted the
floor. Dust motes spun in the lights I passed. I was beside myself in many
aspects, flickering flamelight harlequinading my garments, transforming my face
within a dance of shadows.
Flicker.
For an instant it
seemed that the stern visage of Oberon regarded me from a small high
metal-framed oval-as easily a trick of the light as the shade of his late
highness, of course.
Flicker.
I'd swear an
animalistic travesty of my own face had leered at me for a moment, tongue
lolling, from a midlevel rectangle of quicksilver to my left, framed is ceramic
flowers, face humanizing as I turned, quickly, to mock me.
Walking.
Footsteps muffled. Breathing slightly tight. I woadered whether I should summon
my Logrus sight or even try that of the Pattern. I was loath to attempt either,
though, memories of the nastier aspects of both Powers still too fresh within
me for comfort. Something was about to happen to me, I was certain.
I halted and
examined the one I thought must have my number-framed in black metal, with
various signs from the magical arts inlaid in silver about it. The glass was
murky, as if spirits swam just out of sight within its depths. My face looked
leaner, its lines more heavily inscribed, the faintest of purple halos,
perhaps, flickering about my head within it. There was something cold and
vaguely sinister about that image, but though I studied it for a long while,
nothing happened. There were no messages, enlighteaments, changes. In fact, the
longer I stared, the more all of the dramatic little touches seemed but tricks
of the lighting.
I walked on, fist
glimpses of unearthly landscapes, exotic creatures, hints of memory, neat
subliminals of dead friends and relatives. Something within a pool even waved a
rake at me. I waved back. Having so recently survived the traumas of my trek
through the land between shadows, I was not as intimidated by these
manifestations of strangeness and possible menace as I would likely have been
at almost any other time. I thought I had sight of a gibbeted man, swinging as
in a strong wind, hands tied behind his back, El Greco sky above him.
I've had a rough
couple of days, I said aloud, and there's no sign of any letup. I'm sort of
in a hurry, if you know what I mean.
Something punched
me in the right kidney, and I spun around, but there was no one there. Then I
felt a hand upon my shoulder, turning me. I cooperated quickly. No one there
either.
I apologize, I
said, if the truth requires it here.
Invisible hands
continued to push and tug at me, moving me past a number of attractive mirrors.
I was steered to a cheap-looking mirror in a dark-stained wooden frame. It
looked as if it might have come from some discount house. There was a slight
imperfection in the glass, in the vicinity of my left eye. Whatever forces had
propelled me to this point released me here. It occurred to me that the powers
that be here might actually have been attempting to expedite things per my
request, rather than simply hustling me in a peevish spirit.
So, Thanks, I
said, just to be safe, and I continued to stare. I moved my head back and forth
and from side to side, producing ripple effects across my image. I repeated the
movements while waiting for whatever might occur.
My image remained
unchanged, but on the third or fourth ripple my background was altered. It was
no longer a wall of dimly lit mirrors that stood behind me. It flowed away and
did not return with my next movement. In its place was a stand of dark shrubbery
beneath an evening sky. I continued to move my head slightly several times
more, but the ripple effect had vanished. The bushes seemed very real, though
my peripheral vision showed me that the hallway was intact in both directions
and still seemed to possess its right-hand wall at both ends.
I continued to
search the seemingly reflected shrubbery, looking for portents, omens, signs,
or just a little movement. None of these became apparent, though a very real
sensation of depth was there. I could almost feel a cool breeze upon my neck. I
must have stared for several minutes, waiting for the mirror to produce
something new. But it did not. If this was the best the mirror had to offer, it
was time to move on, I decided.
Something seemed
to stir in the bushes at my back, then, causing reflex to take over. I turned
quickly, raising my hands before me.
It was only the
wind that had rustled them, I saw. And then I realized that I was not in the
hallway, and I turned again. The mirror and its wall were gone. I now faced a
low hill, a line of broken masonry at its top. Light flickered from behind that
shattered wall. Both curiosity and my sense of purpose roused, I began
climbiing slowly, my wariness yet present.
The sky seemed to
grow darker even as I climbed and it was cloudless, a profusion of stars
pulsing in unfamiliar constellations across it. I moved with some stealth amid
stones, grasses, shrubs, broken masonry. From beyond the vine-clad wall I now
heard the sounds of voices. Though I could not distinguish the words being
spoken, it did not seem conversation that I overheard, but rather a
cacophony-as if a number of individuals, of both genders and various ages, were
delivering simultaneous monologues.
Coming to the
hill's top, I extended my hand until it made contact with the wall's irregular
surface. I decided against going around it to see what sort of activity was in
progress on the other side. It could make me visible to I knew not what. It
seemed so much simpler to reach as high as I could, hook my fingers over the
top of the nearest depressed area, and draw myself upward-as I did. I even
located toeholds as my head neared the top, and I was able to ease some of the
strain on my arms by resting part of my weight upon them.
I drew myself
carefully up those final few inches, peering past fractured stone and down into
the interior of the ruined structure. It appeared to have been some sort of
church. The roof was fallen, and the far wall still stood, in much the same
condition as the one I clung to. There was an altar in bad repair in a raised
area off to my right. Whatever had happened here must have happened long ago,
for shrubs and vines grew in the interior as well as without, softening the
lines of collapsed pews, fallen pillars, fragments of the roof.
Below me, in a
cleared area, a large pentagram was drawn. At each of the star's points stood a
figure, facing outward. Inward from them, at the five points where the lines
crossed, flared a torch, its butt driven into the earth. This seemed a somewhat
peculiar variation on the rituals with which I was familiar, and I wondered at
the summoning and why the five were not better protected and why they were not
about the work in concert, rather than each seeming off on a personal trip and
ignoring the others. The three whom I could see clearly had their backs to me.
The two who faced in my direction were barely within my line of sight, their
faces covered over with shadows. Some of the voices were male; some, female.
One was singing; two were chanting; the other two seemed merely to be speaking,
though in stagy, artificial tones.
I drew myself
higher, trying for a glimpse of the faces of the nearer two. This because there
was something familiar about the entire ensemble, and I felt that if I were to
identify one, I might well realize all of their identities.
Another question
high on my list was, What was it they were summoning? Was I safe up here on the
wall, this close to the operation, if something unusual put in an appearance?
It did not seem that the proper constraints were in place below. I drew myself
higher still. I felt my center of gravity shifting just as my view of affairs
improved yet again. Then I realized that I was moving forward without effort.
An instant later I knew that the wall was toppling, carrying me forward and
down right into the midst of their oddly choreographed ritual. I tried to push
myself away from the wall, hoping to hit the ground rolling and run like hell.
But it was already too late. My abrupt push-up raised me into the air but did not
really halt my forward momentum.
No one beneath me
stirred, though rubble rained about them all, and I finally caught some
recognizable words as I fell.
...summon thee,
Merlin, to fall into my power now! one of the women was chanting.
A very effective
ritual after all, I decided, as I landed on my back upon the pentagram, arms
flopping out to my sides at shoulder level, legs spread. I was able to tuck my
chin, protecting my head, and the slapping of my arms seemed to produce a
break-fall effect so that I was not badly stunned by the impact. The five high
towers of fire danced wildly about me for several seconds, then settled once
again into steadier blazing. The five figures still faced outward. I attempted
to rise and found that I could not. It was as if I were staked out in that
position.
Frakir had warned
me too late, as I was falling, and now I was uncertain to what employment I
might put her. I could send her creeping off to any of the figures with orders
to work her way upward and commence choking. But so far I had no way of knowing
which one, if any, might deserve such treatment.
I hate dropping
in without notice, I said, and I can see this is a private party. If someone
will be good enough to turn me loose, I'll be on my way-
The figure in the
vicinity of my left foot did an aboutface and stood staring down at me. She
wore a blue robe, but there was no mask upon her fire-reddened face. There was
only a tight smile, which went away when she licked her lips. It was Julia, and
there was a knife in her right hand.
Always the
smartass, she said. Ready with a flippant answer to any situation. It's a
cover for your unveillingness to commit yourself to anything or anyone. Even
those who love you.
It could just be
a sense of humor, too, I said, a thing I'm beginning to realise you never
possessed.
She shook her
head slowly.
You keep
everyone at arms' distance. There is no trust in you.
Runs in the
family, I said. But prudence does not preclude affection.
She had begun
raising the blade, but she faltered for a second.
Are you saying
that you still care about me? she asked.
I never
stopped, I said. It's just that you came on too strong all of a sudden. You
wanted more of me than I was willing to give just then.
You lie, she
said, because I hold your life in my hand.
I could think of
a lot worse reasons for lying, I said. But, unfortunately, I'm telling the
truth.
There came
another familiar voice then, from off to my right.
It was too early
for us to speak of such things, she said, but I begrudge her your affection.
Turning my head,
I saw that this figure, too, now faced inward, and it was Coral and her right
eye was covered by a black patch and she, too, held a knife in her right hand.
Then I saw what was in her left hand, and I shot a glance back at Julia. Yes,
they both held forks as well as knives.
Et tu, I said.
I told you I
don't speak English, Coral replied.
Et by two,
Julia responded, raising her utensils. Who says I don't have a sense of
humor?
They spit at each
other across me, some of the spittle not quite going the distance.
Luke, it occurred
to me, might have tried settling matters by proposing to both of them on the
spot. I'd a feeling it wouldn't work for me, so I didn't.
This is an
objectification of marriage neurosis, I said. It's a projective experience.
It's a vivid dream. It,s-
Julia dropped to
one knee, and her right hand flashed downward. I felt the blade enter my left
thigh.
My scream was
interrupted when Coral drove her fork into my right shoulder.
This is
ridiculous! I cried as the other utensils flashed in their hands and I felt
fresh stabs of pain.
Then the figure
at the star's point near my right foot turned slowly, gracefully. She was
wrapped in a dark brown cloak with a yellow border, her arms crossed before her
holding it closed up to her eye level.
Stop, you
bitches! she ordered, flinging the garment wide and resembling nothing so much
as a mourning cloak butterfly. It was, of course, Dara, my mother.
Julia and Coral
had already raised their forks to their mouths and were chewing. There was a
tiny bead of blood beside Julia's lip. The cloak continued to flow outward from
my mother's fingertips as if it were alive, as if it were a part of her. Its
wings blocked Julia and Coral completely from my sight, falling upon them as
she continued to spread her arms, covering them, bearing them over backward to
become body-size lumps upon the ground, growing smaller and smaller until the
garment simply hung naturally and they were gone from their points of the star.
There came a
slow, delicate clapping sound then, followed by a hoarse laugh from my left.
Extremely well
executed, came that painfully familiar voice, but then you always liked him
best.
Better, she
corrected.
Isn't poor
Despil even in the running? Jurt said.
You're being
unfair, she told him.
''You liked that
mad Prince of Amber more than you ever cared for our father, who was a decent
man, he told her, That's why Merlin was always your pet, isn't it?
That's just not
true, Jurt, and you know it, she said.
He laughed again.
We all summoned him because we all want him, he said, for different reasons.
But in the end our desires all come to this, do they not?
I heard the
growl, and I turned my head just in time to see his face slide along the
projective curve wolfward, muzzle descending, fangs flashing as he fell to all
fours and slashed at my left shoulder, gaining himself a gory taste of my
person.
Stop that! she
cried. You little beast!
He threw back his
muzzle and howled, and it came out the way a coyote's cry does, as a kind of
mad laughter.
A black boot
struck his shoulder, knocking him over backward and sending him crashing into
the uncollapsed section of wall behind him, which promptly collapsed upon him.
He uttered but a brief whimper before being covered over completely by the
falling rubble.
Well, well,
well, I heard Dara say, and looking that way, I saw that she also held a knife
and fork. What's a bastard like you doing in a nice place like this?
Keeping the last
of the predators at bay, it would seem, replied the voice which had once told
me a very long story containing multiple versions of an auto accident and a
number of genealogical gaffes.
She lunged at me,
but he stooped, caught me beneath the shoulders, and snatched me out of her
way. Then his great black cloak swirled like a matador's, covering her. As she
had done with Coral and Julia, she herself seemed to melt into the earth
beneath it. He set me on my feet, stooped then, raised the cloak, and brushed
it off. As he refastened it with a silver rose of a clasp, I studied him for
fangs or at least cutlery.
Four out of
five, I said, brushing myself off: No matter how real this seems, I'm sure
it's only analogically or anagogically true. So how come you're not
cannibalistically inclined in this place?
On the other
hand, he said, drawing on a silver gauntlet, I was never a real father to
you. It's kind of difficult when you don't even know the kid exists. So I
didn't really want anything from you either.
That sure looks
like Grayswandir you're wearing, I said.
He nodded.
It seems to have
served you, too.
I suppose I
should thank you for that. I also suppose you're the wrong... person to ask
whether you really bore me from that cave to the land between shadows.
Oh, it was me
all right.
Of course, you'd
say that.
I don't know why
I should if I didn't. Look out! The wall!
One quick glance
showed me that another big section of wall was falling toward us. Then he
pushed me, and I sprawled across the pentagram again. I heard the stone;
crashing behind me, and I half rose and threw myself even farther forward.
Something struck the
side of my head.
I woke up in the
Corridor of Mirrors. I was lying facedownward, my head resting on my right
forearm, a rectangular piece of stone clutched in my hand, the aromas of the
candles drifting about me. When I began to rise, I felt pains in both shoulders
and in my left thigh. A quick investigation showed me that I bore cuts; in all
three of those places. Though there wasn't much I could do now to help
demonstrate the veracity of my recent adventure beyond this, it wasn't
something I felt like shrugging off either.
I got to my feet
and limped back to the corridor that ran past my rooms.
Where'd you go?
Random called down to me.
Huh? What do you
mean? I responded.
You walked back
up the hall, but there's nothing there.
How long was I
gone?
Half a minute
maybe, he answered. I waved the stone I still carried.
Saw this lying
on the floor. Couldn't figure what it was, I said.
Probably blown
there when the Powers met, he said, from one of the walls. There were a
number of arches edged with stones like that at one time. Mostly plastered over
on your floor now.
Oh, I said.
See you in a bit, before I take off.
Do that, he
replied, and I turned and found my way through one of the day's many broken
walls and on into my room.
The far wall had
also been blasted, I noticed, creating a large opening into Brand's dusty
chambers. I paused and studied it. Synchronicity, I decided. It appeared there
had once been an archway connecting those rooms with these. I moved forward and
examined the exposed curve along its left side. Yes, it had been rendered from
stones similar to the one I held. In fact
I brushed away
plaster and slid mine into a broken area. It fitted perfectly In fact, when I
gave it a small tug, it refused to be removed. Had I really brought it back
from the sinister father-mother-brother-lovers ritual dream beyond the mirror?
Or had I half-consciously picked it up on my return, from wherever it had been
blasted during the recent architectural distress?
I turned away,
removing my cloak, stripping off my shirt. Yes. There were punctures like fork
marks on my right shoulder, something like an animal bite on my left. Also,
there was dried blood on my left trouser leg in the area of a tear beyond which
my thigh was tender. I washed up and brushed my teeth and combed my hair, and I
put a dressing on my leg and left shoulder. The family metabolism would see me
healed in a day, but I didn't want some exertion tearing them open and getting
fresh garments gory.
Speaking of
which...
The armoire was
undamaged and I thought I'd wear my other colors, to give Luke a happy memory
or two for his coronation: the golden shirt and royal blue trousers I'd found
which approximated Berkeley's colors almost exactly; a leather vest dyed to
match the pants; matching cloak with gold trim; black sword belt, black gloves
tucked behind it, reminding me I needed a new blade. Dagger, too, for that
matter. I was wondering about a hat when a series of sounds caught my
attention. I turned.
Through a fresh
screen of dust I now had a symmetrical view into Brand's quarters; rather than
a jagged openning in the wall the archway stood perfect and entire, the wall
intact at either hand and above. The wall to my right also seemed less damaged
than it had been earlier.
I moved forward
and ran my hand along the curve of stones. I inspected adjacent plastered
areas, looking for cracks. There were none. All right. The stone had borne an
enchantment. To what end?
I strode through
the archway and looked around. The room was dark, and I summoned the Logrus
sight reflexively. It came and served me, as usual. Perhaps the Logrus had
decided against holding a grudge.
At this level I
could see the residue of many magical experiments as well as a number of
standing spells. Most sorcerers leave a certain amount of not normally visible
magical clutter about, but Brand seemed to have been a real slob, though of
course, he might have been rushed quite a bit near the end there when he was
trying to take over control of the universe. It's not the sort of occupation
wherein neatness counts the way it might in other endeavors. I passed on along
my tour of inspection. There were mysteries here, unfinished bits of business
and indications that he had gone farther along some magical routes than I had
ever wished to go. Still, there was nothing here that I felt I could not handle
and nothing representing grave and immediate danger. It was just possible, now
I'd finally had an opportunity to inspect them, that I might want to leave the
archway intact and add Brand's quarters to my own.
On the way out I
decided to check Brand's armoire to see whether he had a hat to go with what I
was wearing. I opened it and discovered a dark three-cornered one with a golden
feather, which fitted me perfectly. The color was a little off, but I suddenly
recalled a spell which altered it. As I was about to turn away, something to
the rear of that top shelf which held the hats glinted for a moment within my
Logrus vision. I reached in and withdrew it.
It was a long and
lovely gold-chased sheath of dark green, and the hilt of the blade which
protruded from it appeared to be goldplated, with an enormous emerald set in
its pommel. I took hold of it and drew it partway, half expecting it to wail
like a demon on whom one has dropped a balloon filled with holy water. Instead,
it merely hissed and smoked a little. And there was a bright design worked into
the metal of its blade-almost recognizable. Yes, a section of the Pattern. Only
this excerpting was from the Pattern's end, whereas Grayswandir's was from a
point near the beginning.
I sheathed it,
and on an impulse I hung it from my belt. His old man's sword would make a neat
coronation present for Luke, I decided. So I'd take it along for him. I let
myself out into the side corridor then, made my way over a small section of
collapsed wall from Gerard's quarters and back past Fiona's door to my dad's
rooms. There was one thing more I wanted to check, and the sword had reminded
me. I fished in my pocket for the key I'd transferred from my bloody trousers.
Then I decided I'd better knock. What if...
I knocked and
waited, knocked again and waited again. In that nothing but silence ensued I
unlocked the door and entered. I went no farther than that first place. I'd
just wanted to check the rack.
Grayswandir was
gone from the peg where I'd hung it. I backed out, closing and locking the
door. The fact that the row of pegs had been empty was an instance of obtaining
the knowledge one wanted and still not being certain what one had proved
thereby. Yet it had been something I'd wished to know, and it did make me feel
that final knowledge was nearer than it had been...
I walked back,
past Fiona's rooms. I reentered Brand's rooms through the door I had left ajar.
I hunted around till I spotted a key in a nearby ashtray. I locked the door and
pocketed the key; that was almost silly because anyone could walk in from my
room now and my room was missing a wall. Still...
I hesitated
before crossing back to my sitting room with its Tabriz stained with ty'iga spit
and partly covered by fallen wall. There was something almost restful about
Brand's quarters, a kind of peaceful quality I hadn't really noticed before. I
wandered a bit, opening drawers and looking inside magic boxes, studying a
folder of the man's drawings. The Logrus sight showed me that something small
and potent and magical was secreted in a bedpost, radiating lines of force
every which way. I unscrewed the knob, found the compartment within it. It
contained a small velvet bag which bore a ring. The band was wide, possibly of
platinum. It bore a wheellike device of some reddish metal, with countless tiny
spokes, many of them hair-fine. And each of these spokes extended a line of
power leading off somewhere, quite possibly into Shadow, where some power cache
of spell source lay. Perhaps Luke would rather have the ring than the sword.
When I slipped it on, it seemed to extend roots to the very center of my body.
I could feel my way back along them to the ring and then out along those
connections. I was impressed by the variety of energies it reached and
controlled-from simple chthonic forces to sophisticated constructs of High
Magic, from elementals to things that seemed like lobotomized gods. I wondered
why he hadn't been wearing it on the day of the Patternfall battle. If he had,
I'd a feeling he might have been truly invincible. We could all have been
living on Brandenberg is Castle Brand. I wondered, too, why Fiona, in the next
room over, had not felt its presence and come looking for it. On the other
hand, I hadn't. For what it was, it didn't register well at all, beyond a few
feet. It was amazing the treasures this place contained. Was it something about
the private universe effect said to obtain in some of these rooms? The ring was
a beautiful alternative to Pattern Power or Logrus Power, hooked in as it was
with so many sources. It must have taken centuries to empower the thing.
Whatever Brand had wanted it for, it had not been part of a short-range plan. I
decided I could not surrender the thing to Luke-or to anyone with any
familiarity with the Arts. I didn't even think I should trust a nonmagician
with it. And I certainly didn't feel like returning it to the bedpost. What was
that throbbing at my wrist? Oh, yes, Frakir. It had been going on for some
small while, and I'd barely noticed.
Sorry you lost
your voice, old girl, I said, stroking her as I explored the room for threats
both psychic and physical. I can't find a damned thing here that I should be
worried about.
Immediately she
spiraled down from my wrist and tried to remove the ring from my finger.
Stop! I
ordered. I know the ring could be dangerous. But only if you use it wrongly.
I'm a sorcerer, remember? I'm into these matters. There is nothing special about
it for me to fear.
But Frakir
disobeyed my order and continued her attack on the ring, which I could now only
attribute to some form of magical artifact jealousy. I tied her in a tight knot
around the bedpost and left her there, to teach her a lesson.
I began to search
the apartment more diligently. If I were to keep the sword and the ring, it
would be nice to find something else of his father's that I could take to Luke
Merlin! Merlin!
I heard bellowed from somewhere beyond my room.
Rising from a tapping
of the floor and lower walls, where I had been seeking hollow spots, I returned
to my archway and passed through into my own sitting room. I halted then
despite another summons in what I now recognized to be Random's voice. The wall
which faced upon the side corridor was more than half rebuilt since last I had
viewed it-as if an invisible crew of carpenters and plasterers had been
silently at work since I had positioned the dreamstone in the gateway to the
kingdom of Brand. Amazing. I simply stood and stared, hoping for some betraying
bit of business within the damaged area. Then I heard Random mutter, I guess
he's gone, and I called back, Yeah? What is it?
Get your ass up
here quick, he said. I need your advice.
I stepped out
into the corridor through the opening which remained in that wall, and I looked
upward, Immediately I could feel the capabilities in the ring that I wore,
responding like a musical instrument to my most immediate need. The appropriate
line was activated as I assented to the suggestion, and I took the gloves from
behind my belt and drew them on as I was levitated toward the opening in the
ceiling. This, because it had occurred to me that Random might recognize the
ring as having once been Brand's, and that could lead to a complicated
discussion I'd no desire for at the moment.
I held my cloak
close to my side as I came up through the hole into the studio, to keep the
blade under wraps also.
Impressive,
Random said. Glad you're keeping the magical muscle exercised. That's what I
called you for.
I gave him a bow.
Being dressed up made me feel vaguely courtly.
How may I be of
service?'
Cut the crap and
come on, he said, taking hold of my elbow and steering me back toward the
demibedroom. Vialle stood at the door, holding it open.
Merlin? she
said as I brushed by.
Yes? I
answered.
I wasn't
certain, she said.
Of what? I
asked.
That it was
you, she responded.
Oh, it's me, all
right, I said.
It is indeed my
brother, Mandor stated, rising from his chair and approaching us. His arm was
splinted and slung, his face considerably relaxed. If anything about him
strikes you as strange, he continued, it is likely because he has had a
number of traumatic experiences since he left here.
Is that true?
Random asked.
Yes, I replied.
I didn't realize it was all that apparent.
Are you all
right? Random asked.
I seem to be
intact, I said.
Good. Then we'll
save the particulars of your story for another time. As you can see, Coral is
gone and Dworkin is, too. I didn't see them go. I was still in the studio when
it happened.
When what
happened? I asked.
Dwrkin finished
his operation, Mandor said, took the lady by the hand, drew her to her feet,
and transported her away from here. It was most elegantly managed. One moment
they stood at the bedside; the next their afterimages ran through the spectrum
and winked out.
You say that he
transported them. How do you know that they weren't snatched away by Ghostwheel
or one of the Powers? I asked.
Because I
watched his face, he said, and there was no surprise. whatsoever upon it,
only a small smile.
I guess you're
right, I admitted. Then who set your arm, if Random was off in the studio and
Dworkin occupied?
I did, Vialle
said. I've been trained in it.
So you were the
only eyewitness to their vanishment? I said to Mandor.
He nodded.
What I want of
you, Random said, is some idea where they flashed off to. Mandor said he
couldn't tell. Here!
He handed me a
chain, from which a metal setting hung.
What's this? I
asked.
It was the most
important of all the Crown Jewels, he said, the Jewel of Judgment. This is
what they left me. The Jewel part is what they took.
Oh, I said.
Then: It must be secure if it's in Dwotkin's care. He'd said something about
putting it in a safe place, and he knows more about it than anyone else-
He may also have
flipped out again, Random said. I'm not interested in discussing his merits
as its custodian, though. I just want to know where the hell he's gone with the
thing.
I don't believe
he left any tracks, Mandor said.
Where were they
standing? I asked.
Over there, he
said, with a gesture of the good arm, to the right of the bed.
I moved to that
area, feeling through the potencies I ruled after the most appropriate.
A little nearer
the foot.
I nodded, feeling
it would not be all that difficult to look back a small distance through time
within my personal space.
I felt the
rainbow rush and saw their outlines. Freeze.
A power line
moved forth from the ring, attached itself, ran rainbow with them, passed
through the portal which closed with a mild implosion. Raising the back of my
hand to my forehead, I seemed to look down the line
into a large
hall hung with six shields to my left. To my right hung a multitude of flags
and pennons. A fire blazed in an enormous hearth before me...
I see the place
they went to, I said, but I don't recognize it.
Is there some
way you can share the vision? Random asked.
Perhaps, I
replied, realizing there was a way even as I said it. Regard the mirror.
Random turned,
moved nearer the looking glass through which Dworkin had brought me-how long
ago? By the blood of the beast on the pole and the shell that is cracked at
the center of the world, I said, feeling the need to address two of the powers
I controlled, may the sight be cast!
The mirror
frosted over, and when it cleared, my vision of the hall lay within it.
I'll be damned,
Random said. He took her to Kashfa. I wonder why
One day you'll
have to teach me that trick, brother, Mandor commented.
In that I was
about to head for Kashfa, I said, is there anything special I should do?
Do? Random
said. Just find out what's going on and let me know, will you?
Of course, I
said, uncasing my Trumps.
Vialle came up
and took my hand as if in farewell.
Gloves, she
commented.
Trying to look a
little formal, I explained.
There is
something in Kashfa that Coral seems to fear, she whispered. She muttered
about it in her sleep.
Thanks, I said.
I'm ready for anything now.
You may say that
for confidence, she said, but never believe it.
I laughed as I
held a Trump before me and pretended to study it while extending the force of
my being along the line I had sent to Kashfa. I reopened the route Dworkin had
taken and stepped through.
XII
Kashfa.
I stood in the
gray stone hall, flags and shields on the walls, rushes strewn about the
floors, rude furniture about me, a fire before me which did not completely
dispel the dampness of the place, cooking smells heavy on the air. I was the
only person in the room, though I could hear voices from many directions; also
the sounds of musicians tuning and practicing. So I had to be fairly near the
action. The disadvantage of coming in the way I did rather than using a Trump
was that there was no one on the spot to show me around and tell me what was
going on. The advantage was the same-that is, if there were any spying I wanted
to do, now was the time. The ring, a veritable encyclopedia of magics, found me
an invisibility spell in which I quickly cloaked myself:
I spent the next
hour or so exploring. There were four large buildings and a number of smaller
ones within this central walled area. There was another walled sector beyond it
and another beyond that-three roughly concentric zones of ivy-covered
protection. I couldn't see any signs of heavy damage, and I got the feeling
Dalt's troops hadn't met with much resistance. No indications of pillaging or
burning, but then they'd been hired to deliver a property, and I'd a feeling
Jasra had stipulated that it remain relatively intact. The troops occupied all
three rings, and I got the impression from a bit of eavesdropping that they'd
be around till after the coronation. There were quite a few in the large plaza
in the central area, making fun of the local troops in their fancy livery as
they avaited for the coronation procession. None of this was in particular bad
nature, however, possibly because Luke was popular with both groups, though it
did also seem that many individuals on both sides seemed personally acquainted.
The First
Unicornian Church of Kashfa, as one might translate its title, was across the
plaza from the palace proper. The building in which I'd arrived was an
ancillary, all-purpose adjunct, at this time being used to house a number of
hastily summoned guests, along with servants, courtiers, and hangers-on.
I'd no idea
exactly when the coronation was to take place, but I decided I'd better try to
see Luke in a hurry, before he got too swept up into the course of events. He
might even have an idea where Coral had been delivered, and why.
So I found me a
niche with a blank-walled, neutral background even a native probably couldn't
recognize out of context, dropped my invisibility spell, located Luke's Trump,
and gave him a call. I didn't want him to think I was already in town because I
didn't want him to know I possessed the power to drop in the way I had. This
under the theory that you never tell anybody everything.
Merlin! he
announced, studying me. Is the cat out of the sack or what?
Yeah, the
kittens, too, I said. Congratulations on your coronation day
Hey! You're
wearing the school colors!
What the hell.
Why not? You won something, didn't you?
Listen. It's not
as festive a thing as all that. In fact, I was about to call you. I need your
advice before this goes any further. Can you bring me through?
I'm not in
Amber, Luke.
Where are you?
Well...
downstairs, I admitted. I'm on the side street between your palace and the
building next door that's sort of like a hotel at the moment.
That won't do,
he said. I'd get spotted too quick if you bring me down. Go on over to the
Unicorn Temple. If it's relatively empty and there's a dark, quiet corner where
we can talk, call me and bring me through. If there isn't, figure something
else, okay?
Okay.
Hey, how'd you
get here anyway?
Advance scout
for an invasion, I said. One more take-over would be a coup-coup, wouldn't
it?
You're about as
funny as a hangover, he said. Call me.
Break. So I
crossed the plaza, following what seemed marked out as the route of the
procession. I thought I might meet some trouble at the House of the Unicorn and
need a spell to get in, but no one barred my way.
I entered. It was
big and all decked out for the ceremony, with a great variety of pennons on the
walls and flowers all over the place. The only other inhabitant was a muffled
woman up near the front who appeared to be praying. I moved off to the left
into a somewhat darker section.
Luke, I
addressed his Trump. All clear. Do you read me?
I felt his
presence before I caught the image. Okay, he said. Bring me through, and we
clasped hands, and he was there.
He clapped me on
the shoulders.
Well, now, let
me look at you, he said. Wonder whatever became of my letter sweater?
I think you gave
it to Gail.
I think you may
be right.
Brought you a
present, I said, tossing back my cloak and fumbling at the side of my sword
belt. Here. I turned up your father's sword.
You're kidding.
He took it into
his hands, examined the sheath, turned it over many times. Then he drew it
partway, and it hissed again and sparks danced along its tracery and a bit of
smoke drifted upward from it.
It really is!
he said. Werewindle, the Daysword-brother to the Nightblade, Grayswandir!
What's that? I
said. I didn't know there was any connection.
I'd have to
think hard to remember the full story, but they go back a long way. Thank you.
He turned and
took several paces, slapping the weapon against his thigh as he walked.
Abruptly he returned.
I've been had,
he said. That woman has done it again, and I am peeved to the extreme. I don't
know how to handle this.
What? What are
you talking about?
My mother, he
explained. She's done it again. Just when I thought I'd taken the reins and
was riding my own course, she's come along and messed up my life.
How'd she do
that?
She hired Dalt
and his boys to take over here.
Yeah, we sort of
figured that out. By the way, what happened to Arkans?
Oh, he's okay.
I've got him under arrest, of course. But he's in good quarters and he can have
anything he wants. I wouldn't hurt him. I always kind of liked the guy
So what's the
problem? You win. You've got your own kingdom now.
Hell, he said,
then glanced furtively toward the sanctum. I think I was conned, but I'm not
exactly sure. See, I never wanted this job. Dalt told me we were taking over
for Mom. I was coming in with him to establish order, claim the place for the
family again, then welcome her back with a lot of pomp and crap. I figured once
she had her throne back, she'd be off my case for good. I'd hit it out of here
for more congenial turf, and she'd have a whole kingdom to occupy her attention.
Nothing was said about me getting stuck with this lousy job.
I shook my head.
I don't
understand at all, I said. You got it for her. Why not just turn it over to
her and do as you planned?
He gave a
humorless laugh.
Arkans they
liked, he said. Me they like. Mom they're not so fond of. Nobody seems that
enthusiastic about having her back. In fact, there were strong indications that
if she tried it, there would indeed be a coup-coup.
I suppose you
could still step aside and give it to Arkans.
Luke punched the
stone wall.
I don't know
whether she'd be madder at me or at herself for having paid Daft as much as she
did to throw Arkans out. But she'd tell me it's my duty to do it, and I don't
know-maybe it is. 'What do you think?
That's a hard
one to answer, Luke. Who do you think would do a better job, you or Arkans?
I honestly don't
know. He's had a lot of experience in government, but I did grow up here, and I
do know how the place is run and how to get things done. The only thing I'm
sure of is that either of us would be better at it than Mom.
I folded my arms,
and I thought hard.
I can't make
this decision for you, I said. But tell me, what would you most like to do?
He chuckled.
You know I've
always been a salesman. If I were going to stick around and do something for
Kashfa. I'd rather represent her industries abroad, which would be sort of
undignified for a monarch. Probably what I'd be best at, though. I don't know.
It's a problem
and a half, Luke. I don't want the responsibility of telling you which way to
go.
If I'd known it
was going to come to this, I'd have smeared Dalt back in Arden.
You really think
you could take bim?
Believe it, he
said.
Well, that
doesn't solve your present problem.
True. I've a
strong feeling I may have to go through with this.
The woman up
front glanced our way several times. I guess we were talking kind of loud for
the surroundings.
Too bad there
are no other good candidates, I said, lowering my voice.
This must seem
like pretty small beer to someone from Amber.
Hell, it's your
home. You've got a right to take it seriously. I'm just sorry it's doing such a
job on you.
Yeah, most
problems seem to start at home, don't they? Sometimes I just feel like taking a
walk and not coming back.
What would
happen if you did?
Either Mom would
restore herself to the throne with Dalt's gang to back her up, which would
require a mess of executions of people I can think of who'd be against it, or
she'd say the game isn't worth the candle and settle for the Keep. If she
decided to enjoy her retirement, then the coalition which backed him in the
first place would probably spring Arkans and continue things from where they'd
had to leave off
Which course of
action seems most likely to you? I said.
She'd go for it
and there'd be a civil war. Win or lose, it would mess up the country and
doubtless keep us out of the Golden Circle this time around, too. Speaking of
which-
I don't know, I
said quickly. I'm not empowered to talk Golden Circle Treaty with you.
I'd kind of
guessed that, Luke said, and that wasn't what I wanted to ask. I was just
curious whether anyone back in Amber might have said, 'They just blew it,' or
`Maybe we'll give them another crack at it a little farther down the road,' or
`We'll still deal, but they can forget the Eregnor guarantees.
He gave me an
artificial grin, and I returned it.
You can forget
Eregnor, I said.
Figured that,
he said. What about the rest?
I get the
impression it's 'Let's wait and see what happens.
Guessed that
much, too. Give me a good report, even if they don't ask, okay? By the way, I
don't suppose your presence here is technically official?
Personal, I
said, from a diplomatic standpoint.
The lady up front
rose to her feet. Luke sighed.
Wish I could
find my way back to Alice's restaurant. Maybe the Hatter would see something
we're missing, he said. Then: Hey! Where'd he come from? Looks just like you
but-
He was staring
past me, and I could already feel the disturbance. I didn't even bother to
summon the Logrus, though, because I felt ready for anything.
I turned,
smiling.
Are you ready to
die, brother? Jurt asked. He had either managed to regrow his eye or was
wearing an artificial one, and he now had sufficient hair that I could no
longer tell about the ear. His little finger was partly regrown also.
No, but I'm
ready to kill, I said. I'm glad you happened by.
He bowed,
mockingly There was a faint glow about him. I could feel the power that flowed
through and amund his person.
Have you been
back to the Keep for your final treatment? I inquired.
I don't believe
that will be necessary, he said. I am more than adequate for any task I've
set myself, now I've control of these forces.
This is Jurt?
Luke asked.
Yes, I replied.
This is Jurt.
Jurt cast a quick
glance Luke's way. I could feel him focusing on the blade.
Is that a power
object you bear? he inquired. Let me see it!
He extended his
hand, and the weapon jerked within Luke's grip but did not come loose.
No, thanks,
Luke said, and Jurt vanished. A moment later he appeared behind Luke, and his
arm went around Luke's neck in a choke. Luke gripped it with one hand, bowed,
and turned and threw him over his shoulder.
Jurt landed on
his back before him, and Luke made no move to follow up on his action.
Draw that
blade, Jurt said, and let me see it. Then he shook himself like a dog and
rose to his feet. Well? he said.
I see no need
for a weapon in dealing with the likes of you, Luke told him.
Jurt raised both
hands above his head and formed them into fists. They met, remained in contact
for a moment. Then he drew them apart, his right hand somehow drawing a long
blade out of his left.
You ought to
take that show on the road, Luke said, now:
Draw it! Jurt
said.
I don't like the
idea of fighting in a church, Luke told him. You want to step outside?
Very funny,
Jurt replied. I know you've got an army out there. No thanks. I'll even take a
certain pleasure in bloodying a Unicorn shrine.
You ought to
talk to Dalt, Luke said. He gets his kicks in weird ways, too. Can I get you
a horse-or a chicken? Maybe some white mice and aluminum foil?
Jurt lunged. Luke
stepped backward and drew his father's blade. It hissed and crackled and smoked
as he parried lightly and drove it forward. There was a sudden fear on Jurt's
face as he threw himself backward, batting at it, stumbling. As he fell, Luke kicked
him in the stomach and Jurt's blade went flying.
That's
Werewindle! Jurt gasped. How did you come by the sword of Brand?
Brand was my
father, Luke said.
A momentary look
of respect passed over Jurt's face.
I didn't
know... he muttered, and then he vanished.
I waited. I
extended magical feelers all over the place. But there was just Luke, myself
and the lady, who had halted some distance from us, watching, as if afraid to
come any nearer on her way out.
Then Luke
collapsed. Jurt was standing behind him, having just stuck him on the back of
the neck with his elbow. He reached then for Luke's wrist, as if to seize it
and wrench the blade from his hand.
It must be
mine! he said as I reached through the ring and struck him with a bolt of pure
energy which I thought would rupture most of his organs and leave him a
bleeding mass of jelly. Only for an instant had I considered using anything
less than lethal force. I could see that sooner or later one of us was going to
kill the other, and I'd decided to get it over with before he got lucky.
But he was
already lucky. His bath in the Fount must have toughened him even more than I'd
thought. He spun around three times, as if he'd been clipped by a truck, and
was slammed up against the wall. He sagged. He slipped to the floor. Blood came
out of his mouth. He looked as if he were about to pass out. Then his eyes
focused and his hands extended.
A force similar
to the one I'd just thrown at him struck at me. I was surprised by his ability
to regroup and retaliate at that level with that speed. Not so surprised that I
wasn't able to parry it, though. I took a step forward then and tried to set
him afire with a beautiful spell the ring suggested. Rising, he was able to
shield against it within moments of his clothes' beginning to smolder. I kept
coming, and he created a vacuum around me. I pierced it and kept breathing.
Then I a battering ram spell which the ring showed me, even more forceful than
the first working with which I'd hit him.
He vanished
before it hit, and a crack ran up three feet of the stone wall which had been
behind him. I sent sense-tendrils all over and spotted him seconds later,
crouched on a cornice high overhead. He launched himself at me just as I looked
up.
I didn't know
whether it would break my hand or not, but I felt it would be worth it, even
so, as I levitated. I contrived to pass him at about the midway point, and I
hit him with a left, which I hoped broke his neck as well as his jaw.
Unfortunately it also broke my levitation spell, and I tumbled to the floor
along with him.
I heard the lady
cry out as we fell, and she came rushing toward us. We lay stunned for several
heartbeats. Then he rolled over onto his stomach, reached, hunched and fell,
reached again.
His hand fell
upon the haft of Werewindle. He must have felt my gaze as his lingers tightened
about it, for he glanced at me and smiled. I heard Luke mutter a curse and
stir. I threw a deep freeze spell at Jurt, but he trumped out before the cold
front hit.
Then the lady
screamed again, and even before I turned, I knew that the voice had been
Coral's. Reappearing, Jurt half collapsed against her from the rear, finding
her throat with the edge of that bright, smoldering blade.
Nobody, he
gasped, move... or I'll carve her... an extra smile.
I sought after a
quick spell that would finish him without endangering her.
Don't try it,
Merle, he said. I'll feel it ...coming. Just leave me... alone... for half a
minute... and you'll get to live... a little longer. I don't know where you picked
up... those extra tricks... but they won't save you-
He was panting
and covered with sweat. The blood still dripped from his mouth.
Let go of my
wife, Luke said, rising, or there'll never be anyplace you'll be able to
hide.
I don't want you
for an enemy, son of Brand, Jurt said.
Then do as I
say, fella. I've taken out better men than you.
And then Jurt
screamed as if his soul were on fire. Werewindle moved away from Coral's
throat, and Jurt backed off and began jerking, like a puppet whose joints have
seized up but whose strings are still being yanked. Coral turned toward him,
her back to Luke and me. Her right hand rose to her face. After a time Jurt
fell to the floor and curled into a fetal position. A red light seemed to be
playing upon him. He was shaking steadily, and I could even hear his teeth
chattering.
Abruptly, then,
he was gone, trailing rainbows, leaving blood and spittle, bearing Werewindle
with him. I sent a parting bolt after, but I knew that it did not reach him.
I'd felt Julia's presence at the other end of the spectrum, and despite
everything else, I was pleased to know that I had not slain her yet. But Jurt
Jurt was very dangerous now, I realized. For this was the first time we'd
fought that he hadn't left a piece of himself behind, had even taken something
away with him. Something deadly. He was learning, and that did not bode well.
When I turned my
head, I caught sight of the red glow before Coral lowered her eyepatch, and I
realized what had become of the Jewel of Judgment, though not, of course, why.
Wife? I said.
Well, sort of...
Yes, she replied.
Just one of those things, Luke said. Do you two know each
other?